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SCOOP: Woman Caught In Car The Day After It Was Xandalized #ReturnToTheScene (Mug Alert)

Sugar Cookie

Sugar Cookie

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36-year-old Crystal Johnson was charged with vehicle burglary, theft of property, and vandalism when a man found her in his vehicle. The victim was in the process of filing a report because the vehicle had been broken into the day prior.

On May 4th, a prowler was reported at the Deluxe Inn by Courtney Beard. According to the affidavit, Beard told officers that the day prior his vehicle’s window had been smashed and a $1,200 global positioning unit had been stolen.

The thief cleaned up their mess but had left behind a green hat. When officers investigated on the 4th, they discovered Crystal Johnson and Hector Miranda in the vehicle.

Crystal Johnson was later released on her own recognizance.
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www.scoopmemphis.com

Woman caught in car the day after it was vandalized #returntothescene

36-year-old Crystal Johnson was charged with vehicle burglary, theft of property, and vandalism when a man found her in his vehicle. The victim was in the process of filing a report because the vehicle had been broken into the day prior.
www.scoopmemphis.com www.scoopmemphis.com
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Xandalism? Is that what those dang kids these days are into?

Crystal Meth Johnson seems so strung out and reckless that a new word literally has to be invented to address what she's been up to!

Oh this is it:

Xandalism /ZAN duh lis um/ (noun) An act of maliciously damaging, defacing, or destroying property or belongings, particularly possessed or maintained by the public or others, while in an altered state facilitated by ingestible means such as Xanax, Ecstasy, or other drugs or medicines

DISCLAIMER: Neither article states that Crystal Johnson was drunk or high during or contemporary to her alleged crimes. The preceding post does not take an active role in assuming, with neither evidence nor merit, that she was, in fact, not sober at the time; nor does this post directly state as fact a lack of sobriety regarding the defendant. This post is not to be held responsible for damages or misinterpretations regarding the public perceptions or reporting of the incidents, nor does it assume guilt or innocence in regard to the defendant. This fine print makes this post look more official. Officially official. Here's another sentence. And a sentence fragment. I feel serious right now. And official.
 
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