...but the other 12 involved foreign bodies introduced into the urethra."
LOL. Time for me to retell my "Lightning Rods" story for you newbies.
I worked at a video store in Chicago that was in the second largest "gay" neighborhood and catered primarily to the local gay community. It was a regular video store, but specialized in foreign/art/indie films with a focus on LGBT-interest films, that also had a porn section in the back, split between about 90% gay porn and 10% straight porn.
There was so much gay porn back there, none of it underperforming, that the manager took all the fetish titles off the shelves, collapsed the boxes, stuck 'em in plastic sleeves, and just threw them all in a giant bin, so he could make room for
even more gay porn. We kept the tapes behind the counter, and used little tags with inventory numbers on them for customers to pull and bring up to rent. So returning movies meant we had to run out onto the floor and put the rental tags back in the pouches on the display cases - relatively easy for the rest of the store, but of course the fetish bin never stay alphabetized for longer than a couple hours at best, which made returning the tags a time-consuming and revolting task, as you'd have to look through pretty much
all the fetish boxes to find the one film you were trying to put the tag back for. The result: most of the employees just left all the returned tags for those films sitting in a pile on the counter until there were so many that someone finally caved and put them all away (usually the manager, lol.)
It became an initiation rite amongst the staff to tell new hires on their first day that someone had called the store and asked us to put a title called "Lightning Rods" on reserve for them. This would require us to go out and pull the tag so someone else didn't try to rent it (and get disappointed when we can't find the tape - as it's been moved to the reservations shelf.) The senior staff would explain to the new employee that they needed to go looking through the fetish bin to find the tag for this title - the point being, the new employee would have to look at pretty much all of the most graphic and disgusting gay porn we have to offer, wasting 15-20 minutes sorting through it all to find the title/tag, only to come up with the tag and have the other staff laugh at them and explain it was all a joke.
I didn't find it particularly amusing on my first day - but I certainly enjoyed putting others through it.
Lightning Rods? Features a couple of extremely well-muscled, oiled-up dudes ramming thick metal rods into their cocks, right on the cover, complete with expressions of agony/ecstasy on their faces. Most fucked up thing I ever had to look at in that store. Still cannot imagine how anyone could possibly enjoy doing that. On the upside, I guess catheters are no big deal to them when they're older and get prostate cancer operated on.
...
Anyways, don't be vacuuming your dicks, guys.