Maura FussellReston, VA — An inebriated 26-year-old woman was arrested Saturday evening after allegedly showing up at the Arlington Magistrate’s Office in her birthday suit, hoping to see her recently incarcerated hubby.

It is unclear as to whether Maura Fussell had been clothed at some point before entering the building, or whether she arrived all nekkid. Either way, she was bare. And drunk.

Officers apparently gave her many opportunities to put some damn clothes on, or at least take a cab home, but Fussell reportedly refused.

That refusal earned her an overnight stay at the old Graybar Hotel. She’s been charged with indecent exposure and drunk in public. I’m assuming they released her after she sobered up a bit.

No word on what landed hubby in the slammer.…

Elijah NealeyManassas, VA — A 22-year-old woman was sentenced Monday to 50 years in prison, with all but five years suspended, for the 2012 killing of a toddler left in her care. If it makes ya feel any better, she has been ordered to send a check of at least one dollar to a charity of her choosing on the date of Elijah’s death every year after her release.

Jessica Fraraccio pleaded guilty in October to killing 23-month-old Elijah Nealey because he wouldn’t stop crying.

Needless to say, Elijah’s parents, Mark and Jennifer Nealey, are a bit shocked.

“His (the judge’s) decision shows no respect whatsoever for me, my family, or the life of my son,” said Mark Nealey. “To me, it’s a total failure of our justice system. I want everyone to know what the judge thought my son’s life was worth…which is pretty much nothing, according to him.”

The Nealey’s, who both took the stand at Fraraccio’s sentencing hearing, begged the judge to punish Fraraccio “to the fullest extent the law will allow.”

In response, Judge J.…

dumbassRustburg, VA — Three dumbass adults have been charged with malicious wounding and child abuse after police learned a woman’s two children were tattooed. It gets better… one of the three dumbasses arrested actually attempted to remove the tats with a heated razor blade.

The asshole allegedly responsible for tatting the kids in the first place is 20-year-old Alexander Edwards. The children, both of unknown age at this point, were apparently left in his care on December 22. Police say he gave the kiddos tattoos without their consent or their parent’s consent.

When mom, 35-year-old Melissa Derp, sorry…. Delp, and her boyfriend, 32-year-old Daniel Janney, discovered the ink, Janney had the brilliant idea of removing the tattoos with a hot razor blade, causing further scarring and pain, I’m sure.

In addition to the malicious wounding and child abuse charges, Edwards has also been charged with abduction. No bond amounts or any other information at this time.

Michael Mucklow, co-owner of a tattoo removal shop, has stepped up and offered to have the tats removed safely, using a non-invasive procedure that uses lasers to break down the pigment of a tattoo.…

Tevin Kievelle MonroeNorfolk, VA — A 31-year-old man is facing numerous charges after police say he flashed a handgun in the general direction of a manager at McDonald’s when said manager informed him he must fill out an application for employment online.

According to police, Tevin Monroe walked into a Norfolk McDonald’s last week and asked for a job application. The manager on duty informed Monroe they don’t do paper applications anymore — the application process is handled online. Because fuck doing things the old-fashioned way…. it’s all about cold, hard technology, bitch. Just click “Submit,” cross your fingers and pray an actual human looks at it and has the courtesy to get back in touch, k?

Anyway, Tevin wasn’t buying the whole “we don’t have paper applications” thing and asked again. Nonverbally. Like, with a gun. Tevin didn’t even have to remove the handgun from his waistband, he just flashed it. Then, whaddyaknow? A paper application appeared in the manager’s hands.

Poor, stupid Tevin was sitting down in the restaurant filling out that application when police arrived.…

Carlton Walker JrMIDDLESEX COUNTY, VA – If you ever wanted to know what not to if your daughter comes home past curfew, then I have a story for you. A father in Virginia is facing some very serious charges after his daughter missed curfew and he held two teens in his driveway with a shotgun before shooting their vehicle.

Carlton Walker Jr. was mighty pissed when two of his daughter’s teenage friends brought her back home two hour past her curfew. Walker blocked their car in the driveway with his pickup and confronted the driver while brandishing a shotgun. He told the driver and his girlfriend they weren’t goin’ nowhere and told his wife to call police.

When the two teens tried to pull forward and turn their vehicle around, Walker fired a shot into the back of their car. The teens called 911 and police arrived on the scene where Walker wanted the couple to be arrested for keeping his daughter out all night.

Police arrested Walker instead, seeing as he was the only one committing any crimes that night.…

Keisha HolmesPortsmouth, VA – A mother is facing murder charges after police say she smothered her one-month-old son to death at a Virginia church.

Keisha Holmes is facing first degree murder charges after she took her son to Holy Trinity Church on August 7 and smothered him with a pillow until he stopped breathing.

Afterwards, Holmes called 911 and told a dispatcher what she had done. When police arrived at her home, which was near the church, they found the baby dead in his crib. Paramedics arrived and tried to revive the baby, but were unsuccessful.

“When we got closer we noticed it was a baby. That hurts because we saw a little baby laying in the front yard trying to be revived,” said one of Holmes’ neighbors. “When they lifted that baby up the baby was still limp. It just tore me up. It really broke me up.”

Holmes gave a full confession to police and was arrested at the scene.

Church members said that Holmes was not a regular member of the church and had just started attending within the few weeks before she murdered her son.…

Jay RileyWOODBRIDGE, VA – A complete tool was arrested after he went to a police station and asked if he had any warrants for possessing child pornography with a computer that contained child pornography.

According to police, 21-year-old Jay Matthew Riley walked into the Garfield District Station in Woodbridge after receiving an “FBI Warning message” on his computer while watching porn. For those of you not aware, this is an old “ransomware” virus that displays a message to the user to pay a fine or be subject to a criminal investigation.

Thinking that this message may be true, Riley took his computer down to the police station to find out. The good news was that Riley did not have any warrants out for possessing child porn. The bad news is he soon would be arrested for possessing child porn.

Turns out that when police searched his computer he had brought them, they found inappropriate messages and photos of underage girls as young as 13-years-old. With this information, police searched Riley’s home and seized more computers and other electronic devices.…

Joseph M. RiveraAlexandria, VA – A DJ in Las Vegas known as Joey Flash has been arrested and charged with filming the rape of various women in the Virginia area, all of whom seem to be unconscious.

Police were first alerted to 34-year-old Joseph M. Rivera’s alleged activities after one of his victim’s reported he’d sexually assaulted her in May. During their investigation, police learned that Rivera had been sexually assaulting unconscious women over a period of several years.

“All the victims appeared unconscious and to this day are unaware of the videos and photographs,” said Detective Brian J. Byerson

Police were able to identify some of the women who told investigators that they never consented to the sex acts or to appearing in  Rivera’s videos. Other women featured in the videos have not been identified and probably have no idea they have been sexually assaulted. Which brings up an interesting question… if you didn’t know you had been raped, would you want to?

Legalities and justice aside, I imagine having an all around good day ruined by a phone call from a cop that goes something like this:

Morbid: “Hello”
Cop:  “Is this Mr.…

Not His Bike Just A Stock PhotoSpotsylvania, VA – I know it’s late, but there has been a possible abduction in Virginia I just read about and thought I would get something posted about it. A witness told police they watched a man grab a kicking, screaming boy and forced him into a van before taking off at a high rate of speed.

It happened in Spotsylvania, Virginia at around 1:45 p.m. near the intersection of Smith Station Road and Holleybrooke Drive. A resident called police to report seeing a man force the boy inside the van and sped off, running stop signs to get away. The boy was reportedly fighting to get away, screaming for help and biting the suspect. Investigators on the scene found an abandoned gray BMX bicycle the boy was believed to be riding before the van approached him.

The boy is described as a 10-12 year old white male, 5 feet tall, slim build with brown hair that extends to the middle of his neck. He was wearing a red and white horizontal striped pullover shirt with dark colored cargo shorts.…

Shavaughn RobinsonRichmond, VA – Shavaughn Robinson has been accused of giving birth to a baby girl while at work, and then tossing the infant into a dumpster “like common household trash.”

Robinson was working in the Lee Medical Building as a massage therapist last week when she went into the bathroom and gave birth to a baby girl.  Robinson put her daughter in a bathroom trash can, covered her with paper towels, tied the trash bag closed and tossed it in a dumpster behind the building.

A cleaning crew says they saw the 27-year-old cleaning up blood in the bathroom, but say Robinson told them she was having stomach problems. Police were not called until later that evening, after a janitor found the dead baby in the dumpster.

The medical examiner has ruled that the baby died of asphyxiation, and police have classified the baby’s death as a homicide. Robinson has only been charged with concealment of a dead body at this point, but more charges are likely. While in court the other day, Assistant Commonwealth’s Attorney Janae Craddock asked the judge that Robinson be held without bond as she was considered a flight risk.…

Adan Quiroz ‘Manuel’ RodriguezCovington, VA – Police have arrested 30-year-old Adan “Manuel” Rodriguez after they say he murdered his wife and buried her body in a Virginia cemetery where he worked as a gravedigger.

Rodriguez’ wife, 24-year-old Ashley Kimberlin Rodriguez, was reported missing on May 13 when the mother of four didn’t show up for work at a local nursing home. Alleghany County Sheriff Kevin Hall said they spoke with her husband that morning, but when they tried contacting him later that day, he had already fled the area.

Police wanted to talk to him again because late Monday night investigators received information that led them to Alleghany Memorial Park, where Rodriguez worked as a gravedigger. In the cemetery, in a remote portion of the cemetery accessible only to employees, Ashley had been found. Her body was found partially buried with a single gunshot wound to her head.

The sheriff’s office issued a warrant for Rodriguez on first-degree murder charges the next day but would not locate him until last Thursday. He was finally tracked down to a home in Pineville, NC where he was hiding inside a closet and suffering from a minor, self-inflicted wound to the neck.…

Carl Michael Cottee JrNewport News, VA – Carl Cottee Jr., 23,  has been charged with the murder of his girlfriend’s 4-year-old daughter, according to police.

Police were called to a home where Cottee had been caring for Madyson Van Cleave Hook while her mother was out. There they found the girl in a bedroom not breathing and showing signs of  trauma to her body, according to police spokesperson Holly McPherson.

The child was taken to a local hospital where she was pronounced dead from blunt head trauma. Madyson’s grandmother was initially told the girl’s death was an accident, and that Madyson got dizzy after taking a bath, passed out and then hit her head.

But that does not explain the bruises and multiple skull fractures the family would later learn the girl had suffered. “It’s horrible I just can’t imagine her going through that pain,” her grandmother said. “I can hear her saying, ‘I love my Nan Nan.'”

Want to hear something infuriating? Madyson’s grandmother also said there was suspicion the girl was being abused after Madyson complained of being locked in a dresser and being left alone.…

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