TACOMA, WA – A couple in Washington have been accused of killing a man so they could live in his home.

Meth leads to some strange problem-solving strategies.

Like when Jeremy and Lorena Shaw needed a new place to live. Shaw just picked out a nice house and killed Homeowner Dude, then moved right in.

Problem solved.

Authorities allege that Shaw used a sham petition as an excuse to case Steven Morphis’ secluded seven-acre property, and to obtain a copy of his signature.

On September 19th, Shaw returned and subdued Morphis by pepper-spraying him, then bludgeoned him repeatedly and cut his throat. After hiding the body, he brought his beloved wife Lorena to their “new home,” warning her not to go into the shed.

And he would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn’t’ve been for those damned handymen.

As is usual when the ingestion of lots of meth is involved, things went a bit awry for the couple on the evening of September 20th, when two handymen found Morphis’ body in a shed, bound hand and foot and wrapped in a tarp and a comforter.…

CAYCE, SC – A man in South Carolina called police to his home to help him find his missing bag of meth.

I always thought Officer Friendly was a myth- some fairy tale they told you in elementary school, like Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny, or the Honest Politician.

Turns out Officer Friendly is real. A meth-head in Cayce, SC met him.

When the unnamed 24 year-old, who is a strong contender for Dumbest Criminal of 2018, went to indulge in his favorite narcotic this past Sunday, he was mortified to find that his meth was missing.

He could have taken this development as a warning from the Good Lord Above not to speed on Sunday, but he didn’t.

He could have run amok and gotten all stabby with the other denizens of his lair (the most popular response to missing meth), but he didn’t.

He could have even gone out and bought more meth. Nope.

You’d never guess what he did in a million years if the headline didn’t give it away.…

SEYMOUR, IN – Police have arrested a man after he failed to call 911 after his 8-year-old son accidentally ate a large quantity of meth.

On the morning of June 21, Curtis Collman III was in the custody of his father, 41-year-old Gilbert Collman.

The boy decided to eat some cereal he found on a plate at his father’s house, unaware that the cereal was actually meth. Several grams of it.

Before Curtis realized he was not eating cereal, police say he’d eaten enough to kill a grown man.

When his father found his son in medical distress, he did not call 911. Instead, he decided to call a friend to come over and help.

The friend told Gilbert he needed to call 911, but Gilbert wasn’t having it and took the woman’s cellphone to prevent her from calling. According to police, he also held a gun to the woman and threatened her life.

Still unwilling to get his son medical help, Gilbert loaded the boy up and drove him to his parents’ house.…

COLUMBIA, SC – A man in South Carolina has pleaded guilty to charges he was using Facebook to trade meth for sex from troubled teens.

Busted People love Facebook.

You can do so many things with it: keep up with those annoying neighbors who finally moved away, say ‘Happy Birthday!’ to people you don’t give two shits about without leaving the couch, or make your friends jealous of that expensive vacation that just broke the bank.

And if you have some extra meth laying around that you want to trade for underage sex, you can use Facebook to make a love connection. Just ask 38-year-old Jeremy Bowen of Columbia, SC.

He just pled guilty in U.S. District Court to a raft of charges centered around just such a brilliant scheme.

All you need is a cellphone, Facebook Messenger, a conveniently-located “alternative school” (read: School of Last Resort) and meth. Lots of meth.

Getting lots of meth was probably pretty easy for Bowen, as he had unlocked the “Blown Up in a Mobile Home Meth Lab” achievement in 2014 in a Stooge-esque incident that ended with him and the Missus dropping Burned Up Buddy at the hospital and running wildly as far as Alabama before being caught.…

BERKELEY COUNTY, SC – Police stop man in possession of six types of drugs and meth hidden in his ass.

Some people just want to catch a buzz, and simply will not be stopped.

Laws, common sense, the physical constraints of anatomy – none of these matter to the true buzz-hound, and a bona-fide Party Master will have a varied supply of stupefacients on hand at all times.

Case in point: Dwayne Gernard Wigfall. He has a black belt in Throwin’ The Fuck Down and packs the goods to prove it.

Wigfall was cruising down College Park Road in Berkeley County, SC a bit after midnight on a hot Tuesday night in June.

He was huffin’ on a blunt in a “spray painted 2002 Volvo” when he ran afoul of local law enforcement and pulled over for an unspecified moving violation.

Since cops can actually smell marijuana smoke (little known fact, but they can), things quickly went downhill, starting with the fact that Wigfall was driving on a suspended license.

A subsequent search of the vehicle would make any dragon-chaser drool: amphetamine, dexamphetamine, oxycodone, Clonazepam, MDMA, weed, and two powders that the cops couldn’t even identify.…

KANSAS CITY, MO – Police have charged a woman with letting men repeatedly rape her two-year-old daughter while she watched.

Police began investigating 25-year-old Azzie Watson after her two children were brought to a hospital by a foster parent in June.

Watson’s children, ages 1 and 2, were living with the foster parent as she was dealing with a pesky charge of felony drug distribution and failing to show up to court.

The foster parent said she took the children to the hospital because of what the 2-year-old girl did as she changed her diaper.

“Daddy hurt me,” the girl reportedly cried. “Daddy, stop being mean. Daddy, it hurts.”

Hospital staff would find that the girl had been repeatedly raped and had meth in her system. Even worse, she had contracted an STD.

Watson’s boyfriend, Charles Green, was arrested that same day on unrelated drug charges and provided police with a recording.

In the recording, Watson can be heard saying she took her daughter to a house at least 10 times and had watched as two men sexually assaulted her.…

Bellingham, WA — A 29-year-old man told police he stabbed his mother to death because he’s a werewolf and she’s a vampire. Why, yes….. drugs may have played a part. How’d ya guess?

Sheaen Smith called 911 at about 2 p.m. Sunday, ranting about werewolves and vampires. When officers arrived at the home Smith shared with his mother, they found 57-year-old Aurora Lee Buol-Smith dead from multiple stab wounds. (Multiple = approximately 20). Several of those cuts, police say, were defensive wounds.

Officers made contact with Sheaen inside the home, and he apparently confessed to killing his mother…. in between delusional rants about werewolves and vampires and whatever else lives in a tweaker’s head. He was promptly arrested on suspicion of second-degree murder while armed with a deadly weapon.

Based on certain statements from Sheaen, investigators have reason to believe the motive, besides the whole vampire thing, was sexual in nature. Authorities have mentioned that it’s not clear if those statements were more delusions or actual facts, and they are waiting on the results of the autopsy.…

ALBUQUERQUE, NM — Medical investigators say 10-year-old Victoria Martens died from strangulation and was suffering from an STD from previous sexual abuse.

For those of you who may have missed this horrible story from August, Victoria Martens was killed on her 10th birthday and her dismembered remains were found wrapped in a smoldering blanket inside her family’s apartment.

Investigators would learn that Victoria’s mother, 35-year-old Michelle Martens, would solicit men to have sex with her daughter for her own sexual gratification. These men would include co-workers and men she met online.

One of these men she met online, 32-year-old Fabian Gonzales, raped Victoria before he strangled her to death as Martens watched. Gonzales and his cousin, 32-year-old Jessica Kelley, would try to dispose of Victoria’s body by dismembering it in a bathtub before wrapping it in a blanket and setting it on fire.

Martens, Gonzales and Kelley were all arrested and are in jail on a myriad of charges. Their trials are scheduled for October. You can read more about the initial reports of Victoria’s murder by clicking here.…

ADA, OK – Police have arrested a couple after they were so high on meth that they failed to get their severely burned infant medical attention.

According to reports, a 16-year-old girl was babysitting a two week old infant when she accidentally burned her.

While giving the infant a bath in the sink under running water, she accidentally turned off the cold water instead of the hot water.

The girl’s mother called the infant’s parents, 25-year-old Patric Eddy and 26-year-old Candace Mercedes, to inform them of what happened.

The couple arrived and took the child home, telling them they were too high on meth to take the child to the hospital right away.

The mother of the babysitter visited the couple’s home the following day to check on the baby and found the infant crying in the bed next to her sleeping parents.

The woman told police the baby was suffering from an “awful” burn on her abdomen and had a diaper full of urine and feces.

The woman woke up Matthews who agreed to let her take the baby to the hospital.…

methheadPOTTAWATOMIE COUNTY, OK – This crusty botch of nature has been arrested for attempting to entice a man with explicit pictures of her infant in exchange for methamphetamine.

According to authorities, Carmita O’Bryant, 22, and James Smith, 31, had a conversation on Facebook in which O’Bryant told Smith that she would do anything for some meth.

Smith replied that he wanted a picture, asking if “she remembered what he had wanted before.”

“Show me you are serious,” he said. “Use your dirty mind and send me a pic, and then I can see what I can get you.”

O’Bryant responded by sending him three pictures of her 5-month-old daughter’s genitals. He then asked her if she was ready to “give that up.”

Police would also learn during their interview with O’Bryant that she had previously performed sexually assault on an 18-month-old child while Smith watched and masturbated.

The couple have had an off and on relationship for several years and share other children together. If convicted they both face charges that include sex trafficking of children, child porn, and the buying or selling of children.…

victoria-martensALBUQUERQUE, NM – Just when you think the story about Victoria Martens’ death couldn’t any worse, it does. Turns out her mother regularly brought men over to have sex with her 10-year-old daughter just so she could watch.

For those of you who may have missed the earlier story, Victoria died hours before her birthday after her mother and two others drugged her to have sex with her before the little girl was strangled, stabbed, dismembered and set on fire.

The girl’s mother, Michelle Martens, told officers that she and her boyfriend, 31-year-old Fabian Gonzales, along with 31-year-old Jessica Kelley, gave Victoria meth orally for her to swallow.

Martens admitted she watched Kelley hold Victoria down while Gonzales raped and strangled her. Kelley then stabbed her, and she and Gonzales dismembered her body and set her on fire in the bathtub.

Now reports are saying that this was not the first time Victoria had been raped. Michelle Martens admitted she had allowed other men to come over and sexually assault her daughter.…

Michelle MartensALBUQUERQUE, NM – Police say a woman participated with three other people in the drugging, rape and murder of her 10-year-old daughter, just hours before the girl’s birthday party.

Police were called to an apartment complex Wednesday morning on a report of a domestic disturbance. When they arrived, they found the dead body of 10-year-old Victoria MArtens.

According to police, the girl’s mother, 35-year-old Michelle Martens; Martens’ boyfriend, 31-year-old Fabian Gonzales; and 31-year-old Jessica Kelley, injected the girl with meth so they could sexually assault her.

According to the criminal complaint (WARNING: Very graphic), Gonzales drugged the girl so he could have sex with her. After Gonzalez choked the girl, Kelley held her hand over Victoria’s mouth and stabbed her in the stomach.

Once she was dead, the three tried to dispose of Victoria’s body by dismembering it and setting it on fire. When police arrived at the apartment, one officer found the girl’s body in a bathtub, rolled up in a blanket that had been set on fire.…


  • The Pulpit of Doom Podcast





  • Recent Comments

  • Prophets of Doom

    Be sure to pick up the DD crApp for Android. Coming to iTunes soon.