SELMA, NC – A woman is facing animal cruelty charges after she drank a potentially lethal amount of alcohol before getting behind the wheel of her vehicle.

The not-so-nice lady with the “rode hard and put away wet” look is Gloria Denise Mitchell, and, believe it or not, she is only 45.

How do you get that rough-looking in just 45 years? Techniques vary from harridan to harridan; Gloria’s time-tested technique is alcohol, and lots of it.

She exceeded even her own usual excess on the evening of July 5th at an upper-crust lodging facility known as the Knights Inn (please keep your sexual innuendos to yourselves).

It was there she swilled enough booze to clock in at an impressive 0.347% BAC, just one one-hundredth of a percentage point away from .357, which is the exact diameter of the high-powered pistol bullet that she probably deserves.

After impressing her fellow sophisticates with her alcoholic acumen, she decided to show off her similarly sharp driving skills by driving her pickup truck across the Knights Inn’s parking lot in reverse like a Heimlich-launched wad of gristly, overcooked meat from the throat of a choking, whore-spawned degenerate.…

Colleen LoughmanFORT LAUDERDALE, FL – Dashcam footage of 43-year-old Colleen Loughman’s drunk driving arrest shows that Dean Vernon Wormer was right; fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life – especially when you have a 2-year-old child.

According to reports, Loughman had driven several miles down I-95 without a tire before stopping in the emergency lane.

When a trooper stopped to see if she needed assistance, he noted her breath smelled of alcohol, her speech was slurred, and her eyes looked like to freshly fucked assholes.

Inside her vehicle, the trooper found Loughman’s 2-year-old sleeping in his car seat in a vehicle littered with paperwork, open food containers and spilled yogurt.

At first Loughman treats the entire encounter as a joke, even waving at the officer’s dashcam. But her demeanor quickly changes after she fails the officer’s sobriety check and is told she is being arrested for drunk driving.

“Please don’t arrest me! Please!” Loughman can be heard screaming as police try putting her in handcuffs. “I’m going to call CNN!

Kisha YoungCROWLEY, TX – A 12-year-old girl is dead after a woman had her ride on top of her car because she didn’t want the girl’s wet bathing suit messing up the car’s upholstery.

Kisha Young, 38, spent June 17 getting drunk at the Creekside Community Pool with the victim’s mother and their six children between the ages of 8 and 14.

When the group left the pool, Young had the kids ride on top of her Chevy Malibu because their bathing suits were wet.

While taking the 1-minute drive home, four of the children fell off the car as Young drove around a corner. Neither Young or the victim’s mother were aware their load had lightened until some teenagers flagged down their car at the end of the street.

Three of the children were treated at the hospital and later released, but 12-year-old Octavia Watkins was admitted with severe head injuries. She never regained consciousness and was removed from life support last Wednesday.

“She was totally unconscious the whole time, so that was my main concern,” said Albert Garcia who found Watkins in the street.…

Nathan StumlerLOUISVILLE, KY – I missed this when it was reported on last week, but I just couldn’t pass up the mugshot.

Nathan Stumler has been accused of getting into an accident while driving drunk, then leaving his 7-year-old child crying in the road after he fled the scene.

Officers responding to a report of an intoxicated driver found Stumler’s daughter screaming in the street. They also found Stumler’s still-running vehicle with some fresh damage to the front end.

When officers calmed down the frightened but uninjured girl, she told them that her father had struck something with his vehicle and ran over the curb before parking the car and running away on foot.

She also pointed out the direction her drunk dad had ran, and police were able to locate the 25-year-old a short time later. Police reported that when he was found, Stumler was unsteady on his feet, had slurred speech and smelled like alcohol.

For his attempt at getting out of a DUI charge, Stumler was taken into custody and charged with operating a vehicle under the influence of alcohol or drugs and first-degree wanton endangerment.…

Juan GonzalezDavie, FL — A grieving father, angry over the death of his son in an alleged drunk driving accident, was arrested at the courthouse Monday after attempting to knock the stupid out of the man accused in the boy’s death.

On June 12, 2011, Juan Gonzalez Jr. was riding his motorcycle when he slammed into a Jeep Cherokee driven by John Powers. Police allege Powers was attempting to make a u-turn from northbound State Road 7 at Orange Drive. Gonzalez, who was traveling south, slammed on his brakes to avoid hitting the Jeep. The motorcycle skidded, slid on its side, and slammed into the Jeep. Gonzalez died from his injuries the next day.

A Davie police officer noticed the smell of alcohol on Powers’ breath, and several empty beer cans were found in his vehicle. He blew a 0.15, which is nearly twice the legal limit.

Powers was ultimately charged with DUI manslaughter and manslaughter with an unlawful blood alcohol level. He pleaded not guilty Monday. The Gonzalez family was in attendance at that hearing.…

Ethan CouchFORT WORTH, TX — A juvenile court judge has gotten some people upset after she sentenced 16-year-old Ethan Couch to 10 years’ probation for the drunk driving crash that killed four people.

Back in June, Breanna Mitchell’s SUV had a flat tire so she pulled over to the side of the road. Hollie Boyles, 52, and her daughter, Shelby Boyles, 21, lived nearby and had came out to help Mitchell. Brian Jennings, 41, was driving by and also stopped to see if he could lend a hand.

Unfortunately for all of them, 16-year-old Ethan Couch was also on the road, driving drunk. He and some of his seven passengers had stolen some beer from a Walmart hours earlier and were speeding when Couch lost control of his truck, left the road and struck Breanna’s SUV.

Breanna, Hollie, Shelby and Brian were not in the road when the collision occurred, but they were all killed on impact and thrown 50 to 60 yards away. One of Couch’s passengers suffered serious injuries while another remains paralyzed and only able to communicate by blinking his eyes.…

Thomas MerendaLauderhill, FL – Two police officers turned themselves in last week amid allegations that they pressured two female DUI suspects into giving them sexual favors in return for not arresting them.  One officer allegedly ordered one of the women to punch him in the nuts because it turned him on.

Police officer Thomas Merenda, 34, and his partner, Franklin Hartley, 33, pulled over two intoxicated women around 4 am at a Taco Bell.  The women allege that Hartley told them he could arrest them, but then told them to drive behind a strip mall where Merenda was waiting.

Hartley followed them and once there, began to “kiss and touch” the passenger’s breasts “while reminding her she could be arrested.”  Then he reportedly ordered her to have sex with him, which she did.

At the same time, Merenda gave the other female a very thorough “pat down” and then asked her to punch him in the “nuts” and “reassured her that this was ok and this turned him on.”  His ever-helpful partner encouraged the woman to do so by saying that he “really enjoys this” and the woman kicked Merenda in the balls.…

Owen GilmanSTONINGTON, CT – A 10-year-old boy in the backseat of his father’s car called 911 to report his dad was driving drunk moments before his father crashed.

Rhode Island State Police received a 911 call from the boy who said he and his 12-year-old sister were passengers in a Mercedes driven by their father, Owen Gilman. The boy said he was in fear for his life because his old man was drunk and driving erratically.

The boy told them he was so scared that he was contemplating jumping from the moving vehicle because that would be better than crashing at the speeds his father was currently driving. The boy didn’t have time to test his theory, because moments later his father rear-ended a Jeep Grand Cherokee.

Gilman hit the Jeep so hard that he sent it 50 feet off the shoulder of the interstate and down an embankment where it overturned. The driver of the Jeep was taken to the hospital to be treated for blunt force trauma and lacerations and was last listed in fair condition. …

Jean KeatingLINN COUNTY, OR – A woman wanted for a DUI related death in 1997 was found in Canada after she bragged about getting away with murder inside a bar.

Police said in 1997, a then 38-year-old Jean Keating was driving drunk when she sideswiped a car driven by 65-year-old Jewel Anderson, causing her cross the center median and collide with another vehicle. Anderson was pronounced dead at the scene. Keating, as is usually the case with drunks, was not hurt.

Keating was charged with manslaughter, DUII, reckless driving and recklessly endangering another person. But while awaiting trial in March 1998, Keating’s attorney informed authorities he was concerned his client had “flown the coop.”. The Linn County Circuit Court issued a bench warrant for Keating’s arrest and she hasn’t been heard from since. Well, until now.

In early 2013 a police officer in Manitoba, Canada had followed up on a tip about a woman telling people in a bar how she had gotten away with the deadly crash in the United States.…

Luis BrionesALBUQUERQUE, NM – Police in New Mexico have arrested 25-year-old Luis Briones after they say he was having sex with a woman while driving drunk when he crashed his vehicle.

“Mr. Briones was observed to be having sexual intercourse with the passenger and sped off… at a high rate of speed,” the police officer wrote in a criminal complaint. “Their activities presented a danger to others in the roadway as exhibited by the accident.”

Police said that after Briones sped off, he crashed his 2006 Ford Explorer into another car after running a red light. The resulting collision ejected his female passenger from the vehicle. She was found on the ground, naked, and suffering from deep cuts to her face and hands.

Witnesses stated Briones was obviously drunk when he exited his vehicle and eventually tried to drive away from the scene, leaving the naked woman behind. When one of the witnesses took the keys from the ignition, Briones ran off and hid behind a nearby cactus wearing one shoe and with his shorts on inside-out.…

Todd HarrellNashville, TN – Todd Harrell, the bassist for that horrible band responsible for the horrible song “Kryptonite,” has been charged with vehicular homicide after he drunkenly hit a pickup truck with his car, killing the driver.

The incident happened Friday night in Nashville, where police say Harrell was speeding in his car when he clipped a pickup truck driven by Paul Howard Shoulders. The truck was sent careening down an embankment and Shoulders was killed after being ejected from his truck. Harrell suffered minor injuries.

Police said 41-year-old Harrell showed signs of impairment at the scene and admitted he’d consumed hard cider along with some Lortab and Xanax. After being taken to jail, deputies found Harrell was hiding a bag in his sock that contained 8 Xanax pills, 24 oxycodone pills and 4 oxymorphone pills.

Todd Harrell is currently in jail on $100,000 bond on charges of vehicular homicide and bringing controlled substances into the jail.

harrell had gotten into similar trouble last year in D’Iberville, MI, after crashing his black Cadillac into the rear of a pickup truck while intoxicated.…

Samantha Gail RhinehartGAFFNEY, S.C. — Samantha Rhinehart was sentenced to 20 years in prison after the 28-year-old admitted to being under the influence of meth when she caused a wreck that claimed the life of her 8-year-old daughter and injured two others.

Back in January, Rhinehart was driving a 2001 Ford truck with seven passengers, including her 8-year-old daughter, Anna Marie Rhinehart. She was doing around 62 mph in a 45 mph zone when she lost control of the truck and ended up slamming into a tree. Rhinehart’s daughter was thrown from the truck on impact and died from multiple head injuries.

Rhinehart, who was driving with a suspended driver’s license and admitted she’d used meth sometime before the crash, was arrested and charged with felony driving under the influence with a death, and two counts of felony driving under the influence with great bodily injury.

The charges were upgraded to reckless homicide, two counts of first-degree assault and battery, and child endangerment after tests revealed the that meth was in her urine, and not in her blood, meaning she’d taken the drug shortly before getting behind the wheel of a vehicle with seven passengers.…


  • The Pulpit of Doom Podcast





  • Recent Comments

  • Prophets of Doom

    Be sure to pick up the DD crApp for Android. Coming to iTunes soon.