Competitive Eating Contests Leave Two Dead

April 4, 2017 at 3:03 am by  

CT & CO — Two separate eating competitions, in two different states, have led to the death of two contestants. Yay for twofers?!

In the first story, we focus on a 20-year-old coed named Caitlin Nelson….

Nelson, pictured here, was taking part in a pancake eating competition at Sacred Heart University in Connecticut Thursday, when, after scarfing down about 4 or 5 pancakes, she began choking.

First responders attempted to clear her airway but to no avail. Nelson was transported to the hospital, where she died Sunday.

It was initially believed that Nelson suffered anaphylactic shock, due to several food allergies, but it has since been revealed that food allergies did not contribute to her death.

Meanwhile, in Colorado….

Travis Malouff, 42, was trying to polish off a half pound donut *drools* in under 80 seconds at a competition hosted by Voodoo Doughnut on Sunday, when he began choking.

The Heimlich maneuver was obviously unsuccessful — the Denver Office of the Medical Examiner confirmed Monday that Malouff died from “asphyxia, due to obstruction of the airway.”

Haven’t had your fill?…

westoverPALATKA, FL – Police have charged an 11-year-old boy with battery after they say he choked a 4-year-old child who is currently hospitalized in critical condition.

Police responded to a home at the Westover Mobile Home Park after receiving a 911 call around 4 a.m. regarding a 4-year-old child who was not breathing.

The responding officer performed CPR on the boy until paramedics arrived and transported him to the hospital.

Police noticed the injured child had strangulation marks on his neck, so they began interviewing the 12 people who lived in the home – six adults and six children eleven years old and under – and eventually determined that an 11-year-old boy was responsible for choking the toddler.

Police arrested the boy in the presence of his mother and placed him in a juvenile detention center on a charge of aggravated battery resulting in serious damage.

Capt. Dick Schauland of the Sheriff’s Office said the 11-year-old had only been back in the home a short time after returning from a Miami rehab program.…

Desmond BrownleeDELTONA, FL – We got the woman who choked her husband over a cowboy hat, and now we have 45-year-old Desmond Brownlee, a man accused of choking his wife over some fried chicken.

According to reports, police responding to a 911 call arrived at a home at around 3 a.m. Monday and heard a female inside screaming, “Please, 911, please.” They also heard a male voice inside the home respond, “Shhh, what do you want, us both to go to jail?”

Brownlee and his wife of four years, Shey Alamo, eventually met the officers at the door where Alamo informed them that she and Brownlee got into an argument over Brownlee not having enough fried chicken leftovers and the care of her mother.

The argument escalated, said Alamo, to the point that Brownlee pushed her into their bedroom and onto a bed. She said he then punched her in the face repeatedly before choking her.

“The victim described the feeling of not being able to breath,” reads the police report. …

adco-master675Decatur, IL — A 23-year-old man is being held on a charge of attempted murder after allegedly choking the shit out of his roommate for eating his cookies.

The alleged victim in this cookie caper, an unidentified 49-year-old woman, told police she believed her  roommate, Allen Hall, was joking when he threatened to kill her for eating three of his Chips Ahoy! cookies for breakfast.

The woman told police she was getting dressed in the bathroom Wednesday morning, when Hall started pounding on the bathroom, making death threats and stuff.

She opened the door, she said, and exclaimed, “If you’re going to kill me, then go ahead!”

Probably not the smartest thing to say to an apparently unhinged, cookie-less motherfucker first thing in the morning, ya know.

According to the victim, Hall wrapped his hands around her throat and threw her into the tub, causing her to hit the back of her head on the tile. He then reportedly climbed on top of her and proceeded to choke her until she found it difficult to speak or breathe.…

Dustin Eric GreenKINGMAN, AZ – Dustin Green got himself into some trouble when he got angry over his woman’s inability to serve him a cooked meal within an acceptable time frame, and ended up choking her.

According to the Mohave County Sheriff’s Office, the 27-year-old and his 22-year-old girlfriend got into an argument over her slow cooking that turned physical. After threatening to beat her with a rubber mallet, Green opted to choke her.

The woman told police that she was in fear for her life, but was not going quietly. She grabbed a kitchen knife and stabbed Green in the leg. In response, Green began beating the woman in the back of the head.

Police arrived at the home and found Green had two warrants for violation of probation and failure to pay fines at two different courts. After being treated at the hospital for the stab wound, Green was booked into Mohave County Jail.

Not surprisingly, Green spent a year in jail after being convicted of assault and domestic violence charges back in 2012.…

Roberto FernandezFLORENCE, AZ  – A man approaching his release from prison killed his cellmate so that he would not be sent back to Mexico.

According to a Pinal County Sheriff’s Office spokesman, 43-year-old Roberto Fernandez was serving time after being convicted of  a sex crime. He’s from Mexico, but committed the crime in the U.S and was serving his time in an Arizona prison.

With his release date coming up, Fernandez decided he liked being in prison and did not want to possibly be sent back to Mexico upon his release. To solve that problem, he decided to do something that would ensure he stayed right where he was. He decided he would commit murder.

The person Fernandez chose to kill was his cellmate, 55-year-old Michael McNaughton, who was serving a six year prison sentence after pleading guilty to a child pornography charge.

But simply killing the man wouldn’t do, figured Fernandez. To ensure he received the stiffest penalty possible, he needed to make sure the murder was brutal enough that he was charged with nothing less than first-degree murder.…

Shan Marie McDonaldPhoenix, AZ – A daycare owner has been arrested after she admitted to choking a 6-year-old girl in her care, and possibly abusing a baby with pillows.

According to the probable cause statement, when a mom arrived at 36-year-old Shan Marie McDonald’s daycare to pick up her two daughters, ages 1 and 5, she found her baby on the couch with a busted lip and unable to open her eyes. The baby was taken to the hospital where she was treated for various injuries, including bruises on her neck, shoulders, face and thighs.

When the 5-year-old was interviewed, she said she didn’t know what happened to her baby sister but did know what happened to a 6-year-old girl who was also at the daycare. According to her, she saw McDonald choke the girl because she couldn’t find her shoes.

The mother of the 6-year-old had also noticed her daughter was sporting injuries when she picked her up and had taken some pictures of marks on her throat and scratches on her forehead. …

Judge Dean MattoonWATERLOO, NY – A judge in upstate New York was assaulted Friday night, beaten and choked with the lid from a discarded toilet, authorities say.

Judge Dean Mattoon told WSTM that Judge Roger Barto was assaulted as he locked up the court right around 10:00 pm. Waterloo police say Barto was attacked from behind by an assailant who used a toilet tank lid from a nearby garbage container. The toilet had recently been removed during building renovations. Bet inmates in Seneca County are having a field day with that particular tid bit.

Police officers found the judge lying near the front door of the entrance to the courtroom. Barto was transported to Rochester and treated at Strong Memorial Hospital, where he remained on Wednesday, five days after the attack. According to police, he’s listed in guarded condition. It wasn’t immediately known if there were any witnesses to the crime, but if you see a guy running around carrying half a shitter, Waterloo Police would like to hear from you.

Authorities say that Barto had been presiding over an arraignment concerning serious traffic violations, but they aren’t saying that the arraignment is linked to the beating.…

Daniel VillasenorCommerce, CA — U.S. postal worker Daniel Villasenor, 55, was arrested after allegedly choking an 11-year-old girl who laughed at him for mistakenly entering the women’s restroom at a local park Monday.

While in uniform and driving a U.S. Postal Service vehicle, police say, Villasenor arrived at Bristow Park that evening and asked the girl where the bathrooms were located.

It was then that Villasenor apparently wandered into the woman’s room, causing the child and her friend to erupt with laughter.

A presumably red-faced Villasenor quickly visited the men’s room, and when he exited, found the girl was still tittering.

According to the L.A. County District Attorney’s Office, Villasenor then chased the girl into the women’s room, and began choking her inside a supply room adjacent to the restroom before two city workers told him to stop.

“He got angry and pushed the 11-year-old child, and then grabbed her by the neck and the collar in what appeared to be a choking motion to the witnesses,” said L.A. County Sheriff’s Sgt.…

Faron ThompsonOrlando, FL — A man in Florida has been arrested after police say he assaulted his fiancee and tried forcing her engagement ring down her throat.

On Sunday, police responded to a Florida Walmart after a woman there called to report she had been physically assaulted by her boyfriend of four years.

The woman told police that her boyfriend, 29-year-old Faron Thompson, got into an argument after she informed him she wanted to move out. In response, Thompson allegedly grabbed his girlfriend’s engagement ring and tried shoving it down her throat.

She also said that he shoved her against a wall as she held their 1-year-old baby and covered her face with his hands to keep her from breathing. When he threatened to burn down the house, she called him a psycho and he shoved her and their baby out the front door. That’s when she called police and arranged to meet a deputy at a nearby Walmart.

Police located Thompson and charged him with battery via strangulation and child neglect.…

CLEVELAND, OH —  Police have arrested a man, accusing him of shoving a baby wipe down his infant’s throat.

Joshua Rains, 25, was arrested Wednesday at the MetroHealth Medical Center and charged with felony child endangerment after his eight-week-old son had to have a baby wipe surgically removed from his throat.

Rains told police that while changing the child’s diaper he wiped his son’s mouth with a baby wipe only to notice the wipe had disappeared. Once he figured out his little shop-vac had swallowed the wipe, he said he tried to pull it out, but only succeeded in jamming it further down the baby’s throat.

Police are calling bullshit and say his description of events doesn’t jive with the baby’s injuries. The baby’s current condition is unknown, but he was on life support on Saturday. Interesting to note, this isn’t the infant’s first visit to the hospital for an injury. At five days old he was treated for a detached eye lens, and I just shuddered while typing that.…

BAKER, LA — A teacher in Louisiana lost it the other day and is now in jail after reportedly choking a 6-year-old student.

The incident happened on the campus playground of an unnamed school where a 6-year-old girl was doing something that really got under 65-year-old Mildred Russ’ skin and had her losing any semblance of patience or control.

First she wrapped her legs around the girl to keep her from moving then tied the girl’s sweater around her neck, squeezing it every time she tried. Russ finally dragged the girl to the principal’s office, pulling her out of her shoes in the process.

For her actions, Russ was arrested on a charge of cruelty to a juvenile and booked into the East Baton Rouge Parish Prison. I know some will come in here and back this teacher in some fashion, citing disrespectful kids, lack of parenting, etc, etc. But I don’t choke disrespectful kids in the grocery store or in my neighborhood, whether they deserved it or not. If I ever do, I would deserve to be in jail just like Mrs.…


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