ARMSTRONG, Iowa — A man with a 40-lb jar of mercury walks into a bar. Sounds like the beginning of a bad joke, right? Well it actually happened the other day in Iowa and ended with more than a dozen people, , including four children, being monitored for mercury poisoning

It all started when a construction worker remodeling a home found a plastic bottle in the basement that contained 40 pounds of liquid mercury. The man decided to take the mercury to a bar so he could show it off to his friends.

While there, someone knocked over the container, spilling half of the mercury on the floor. The bar owner attempted to clean the spill with a shop-vac and a broom. Wanna guess the worst way to clean up a mercury spill aside from lapping it up with your tongue? Not only are the broom and vacuum now contaminated, the heat from the vacuum cleaner’s motor creates even more mercury vapor in the air.

Now that around a dozen bar patrons have been exposed to the mercury, the man decided he’d had his fun and took the  remaining 25 pounds of mercury back to the house–and hid it in a sandbox.…

Shandong, China – Giving new meaning to the phrase “rode hard and put away wet,” eighteen of China’s finest came to the aid of a woman who’d reportedly submerged into one of the province’s rivers–only to find that the  “damsel in distress” was a female sex doll.

The crew had worked frantically for nearly an hour to rescue the “woman” after police responded to a call of a female possibly drowning in the river.  After realizing they had just rescued someone’s blow-up lover, they held it up to the crowd of approximately 1,000 who had gathered to watch the rescue efforts who shielded their children’s eyes and dispersed.

No telling how the sex doll got in the river in the first place, but the Times of India reports that Shandong is a large producer of sex toys and supplies them across the globe.

This is the second story out of China in about a month detailing a sex toy being mistaken for something else. I don’t know if you caught it or not, but one Chinese television station sent out a young female reporter, Ye Yunfeng, to a remote village where a strange mushroom had been discovered.…

Moscow — A Russian fisherman stumbled upon a quite horrific sight Sunday night when he found four plastic barrels that contained 248 fetuses left in a forest in Russia’s Ural Mountains .

“A friend called at night and said he went fishing and wanted to get some wood for his fire. He ran into some water canisters and wanted to take them home, but when he came closer he saw little baby bodies,” local resident Sergei Tveritinov told state television.

Photographs from the site showed fetuses with tags with numbers and inscriptions that Russian media said were the names of families.

Police say that the fetuses were preserved in formaldehyde and kept in barrels marked with surnames and numbers. Depending on which article you read, it is believed that the remains are from three or four local hospitals.

“It seems the company responsible for disposal of the bio-medical waste did not carry out its duties,” the deputy head of the regional government, Vladimir Vlasov, said on state television. The fetuses have since been placed in a local morgue.…

Park City, UT — Last month, a 4-year-old girl in North Carolina was killed after a tombstone fell on top of her while she played in a graveyard. Last week, a 4-year-old boy in Utah died after a headstone fell on top of him while he also played in a graveyard.

Carson Dean Cheney, pictured to the left moments before he was killed, was with his family at a private cemetery taking pictures. The 4-year-old was trying to make other children laugh by pretending to be a leprechaun and poking his head from around one of the tombstones in the 900 grave cemetery.

While Cheney was holding on to it, the metal that attaches the tombstone to its pedestal broke, and the several hundred pound tombstone toppled on to Cheney’s chest and head.

He was pinned there until family members were able to lift the tombstone off Cheney and began administering aid until emergency workers arrived. Cheney was rushed to the hospital but he would die from injuries to his head, chest and abdomen.…

Florida Teen Lost Game Of Russian Roulette

July 2, 2012 at 12:22 pm by  

LARGO, FL —A 17-year-old in Florida has died after losing the game of Russian Roulette he was playing with several of his friends.

According to Bay 9 News, Thorin Montgomery was with some friends on the back porch of his home playing Russian Roulette with a .38-caliber handgun. Thorin was the first to go, and much to the relief of everyone else playing, Darwin stopped by for a visit.

The gun discharged, the bullet striking Thorin in the head. He didn’t die right away, but would do so later after being airlifted by helicopter to Bayfront Medical Center in very critical condition.

The other morons playing the game with Thorin – ages 19, 18 and 16 – have not been identified.

“I’m shocked to find out they’re stupid enough to play that game,” said one neighbor, who obviously does not read D’D . “Kids nowadays, with them playing with guns the way they do, there’s no reason for that.”

An autopsy has been scheduled to determine the exact cause of Thorin’s death.…

ROCKLAND, Maine — A 5-year-old boy is in the hospital today as doctors try to reattach the hand he had severed in a freak jump rope accident.

The boy was in the back seat of his grandmother’s car Tuesday evening and found something to do with a jump rope that was worse than the restraining methods I use them for–from a personal safety standpoint, that is.

The boy had one end of a jump rope wrapped around his wrist while the other end was hanging outside the car window. As they sat at an intersection, the rope got tangled in a car that had pulled up alongside them. When that car drove off, the rope was pulled, and the boy’s hand was yanked off.

A passerby stopped to assist the boy and provided aid until EMS workers arrived. The boy was taken to Pen Bay Medical Center in Rockport and the driven to Mass General by ambulance after poor weather conditions prevented the LifeFlight aircraft from being used.

No word on if the surgery was successful or how the boy is doing.…

MAINE TOWNSHIP, Ill. — Reports are that last week an 18-month-old girl in Illinois lost a fingertip to the family’s pet piranha.

The girl’s mother said she heard her daughter crying and found her with a bleeding finger that was missing the tip. At first she thought the family’s pit bull may have been the culprit, because you know, it’s a pit bull.She would learn this was not the case after 911 was called and the girl was rushed to the hospital.

The doctor who examined the girl said her injury could not have come from the 65-pound dog, but the culprit could have been one of the two piranhas swimming in a tank near where the girl had been playing. Authorities called the girl’s father, who was still at home, and informed them of their suspicions.

Without hesitation, the father plunged his hand in the tank, snagged one of the fish and cut it open. There, inside the piranha, was his daughter’s missing fingertip. The upset father delivered the piece to the doctors, who attempted to re-attach it to his daughter.…

Miami, FL — Another story in the news today that includes an x-ray of an object piercing straight through someone’s skull.

In this incident, 16-year-old Yasser Lopez was preparing to go fishing with a friend when a spear gun his friend was packing accidentally discharged. The three-foot spear entered above Lopez’s left eye and lodged in his head–after passing completely through his brain.

“It was about one inch above his right eye straight through,” said trauma surgeon Dr. George Garcia. “You could feel the tip under the skin on the posterior part of the skull.”

The miraculous thing is that Lopez did not die immediately, but somehow the spear missed every major blood vessel in his brain. The teen also got lucky in that the spear went through the right side of the brain, the side that does not control speech.

But surviving a spear to the brain without dying is only part of the issue. the other part is doctor’s being able to remove the damn thing without killing Yasser or causing him more serious injuries.…

LORAIN, Ohio — A judge in Ohio threw a man in jail for three days because he showed up in his courtroom wearing sagging britches.

I could easily fill this article making fun of the people I see on a daily basis wearing their pants below their ass waddling down the sidewalk with their boxers showing. I don’t get it, but I grew up in the ’80s and didn’t get why men wore things like this, this and this.

But no matter what style of the times is being lauded as another sign of societal decline, there are just certain times when common sense says you just should not wear them. A funeral, a job interview or standing in front of a judge are just a few examples. One man found that out the other day after he chose to go inside Lorain Municipal Court Judge Mark Mihok’s courtroom with his pants on the ground and his underwear showing.

Durrell Brooks was in Mihok’s courtroom last Thursday, accompanying a woman facing a traffic violation, to tell the judge that he had insurance on the car the woman had been driving when she got into an accident.…

DEEP GAP, N.C. — Here’s a tragic story out of North Carolina where a 4-year-old girl was killed last Friday after a tombstone fell on top of her.

While waiting on Vacation Bible School classes to begin, Peyton Elizabeth Townsend and her older sister were with several other children playing in the backyard of Mt. Paran Baptist Church. The church’s backyard doubles as a small cemetery where about two dozen people are buried.

As the children were running around the graves, a stone cross–estimated to weigh anywhere from 1,000 to 1,200 pounds–somehow fell off a tombstone and landed on top of Peyton’s chest.

Peyton’s parents where there at the time of the freak accident. Her father is a paramedic, her mother a nurse, and both of them frantically tried saving their daughter’s life after moving Peyton from underneath the stone slab. Peyton was airlifted to Johnson City Medical Center in Tennessee where she later died.

Seth Miller, a member of the church, said the grave belonged to his cousin.

“There’s no more smiling or thinking of good things after this,” said Miller.…

POPLAR BLUFF, MO — Two years ago we reported on someone in North Carolina who was killed by a train while investigating a ghost train. Now we have two teenage girls in Missouri who were also trying to catch a glimpse of a ghost train, and were killed when a very real train smashed into the vehicle they were sitting in.

“They were playing a stupid game called ‘Ghost Train,’ and the object is to get scared, kind of like telling stories on Halloween,” Butler County Coroner Jim Akers said. “The game was to park on the tracks, let the windows fog up inside and let your mind play tricks on you.”

As Aikers stated, and as detailed in a post at, the game consists of stopping your vehicle on a particular stretch of tracks on Wilcox Road and turning it off. As you sit there with the rolled up windows becoming increasingly foggy, legend says you may see the lights of a train that crashed in the 1900s.…

JOPPATOWNE, MD — We went through a period of time where our cannibalism category remained relatively unpopulated with stories, but wow, how that has changed within the last month.

Aside from the psycho who ate another man’s face and the gay porn actor who likely ate a chunk of a dead man’s ass, we now have a 21-year-old man in Maryland who admitted to killing a man and then eating the victim’s heart and portions of his brain.

Police say 37-year-old Kujoe Bonsafo Agyei-Kodie had been reported missing a week ago, having disappeared from the home he shared with Antony Kinyua and Kinyua’s two sons. Detectives were unable to find any evidence of foul play or his possible location, so on Monday they asked for the public’s help in finding the man.

The following night, Antony called police to report that his son had found a head and two hands inside two metal tins in the basement. When his son confronted his brother, 21-year-old Alexander Kinyua, about the body parts, Alexander explained they were just animal remains.…

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