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Clayton County, Georgia A couple of teachers have found themselves in a bit of hot water.  I guess it’s not such a good idea to post a love letter to your boyfriend’s Facebook when he works in the same building as you…along with his girlfriend. But that’s what happened at Rex Mill Middle School. Ebony sent her man a letter, it was intercepted by Chaka, and all hell broke loose in the hallway Monday during school. They yelled, smacks were thrown about, and the 7th and 8th graders in that school got a quick lesson from their family and consumer science teacher on the fine art of expressing one’s self. The school authorities were not enthused and once the officers were brought in, the brawling teachers were promptly arrested. …

Mountain Home, Arkansas Armed with a face only a mother could love, a criminal past, and an axe, Jason Marshall pretty much fucked up his parole. Monday, police received a couple of distressed phone calls regarding a domestic disturbance, the second of which the victim stated she and her children were able to escape their abuser but needed medical attention. An ambulance was dispatched to intercept the patients, Elizabeth Marshall (41) and her 9-year-old son at an intersection and they were transported to a nearby hospital.…

Richmond, California The homecoming dance took a horrible turn for a 15-year-old girl just prior to midnight Friday evening. When police drove up to Richmond High School about an hour after the dance had ended, they observed several young men fleeing the scene. Upon investigation, they found their 15-year-old victim unconscious and suffering from “different injuries indicating she had been assaulted.” The “assault” is believed to have been a gang rape that lasted for 2 hours. And if that isn’t bad enough, police say there is a high probability of there being video of the assault shot from cell phones. Those images were captured by a group of observers who refused to intervene in any way.…

Joseph Lemaster’s Eventful Evening

October 22, 2009 at 2:54 am by  

Long Bottom, Ohio Joseph Lemaster, 33-years old, must have decided upon a different approach to bonding with his 16-year-old daughter who visits him (rather visited him) on weekends. Instead of opting for catching a movie, chit-chatting across the kitchen table, or playing board games on the living room floor, Joseph allegedly got drunk and set the evening’s events in motion. According to police reports, his daughter attempted to leave his mobile home in a family car after an argument broke out. Daddy grabbed a .22-caliber rifle, shot her dog, then shot through the vehicle and struck her in the head.…

Memphis, TennesseeWitnessing neighbors state that when the fire broke out in the home of Melanie Dunn on Monday afternoon, they heard screams coming from the house. Those screams belonged to 2-year-old Catareon Dunn and 3-year-old Ladereon Dunn. A rescue attempt was made by gaining entrance from the back door but the flames kept them at bay. When firefighters arrived on scene and pulled the children from the inferno, onlookers described the children as being limp and looking like “rag dolls”. But Melanie was not at home as she and the boys’ aunt, Marilyn Wilson, had left them alone that  afternoon to go shopping.  …

James Tait Knows How to Handle a Horse

October 20, 2009 at 5:23 am by  

Maury County, Tennessee It’s hard to say if James Tait was looking to be in the limelight again, if he was just so incredibly horny, or just plain stupid. I mention “limelight” because this is not the first time James’ name has gleaned attention. The first time was 4 years ago when he aimed his camera on his buddy, Kenneth Pinyan, as a horse was screwing the life out of him…literally. Kenneth died from a perforated colon. You’d think James would learn from those lessons but I suppose there’s just something so seductive about forcing a horse’s…hell, you get the picture.…

Maiden, North Carolina Aaron Burke’s wife left her home Monday evening to help a friend move some furniture when she realized she had forgotten her driver’s license at home. Upon her return an hour later, she walked into the house and into her bedroom closet to retrieve her purse when she noticed a light on in the adjacent room, her daughter’s clothes on the floor, and splashing sounds coming from the bathroom. Sounds fun, right? It wasn’t quite the playful bath time one might expect to find. She allegedly walked in on her disabled husband holding her 23-month-old daughter under water while she was struggling against his grip.…

Marina del Rey, California 75-year-old Mostafa Zayed provided his neighborhood with an extra special Halloween display. I think you must be very careful when constructing an arrangement, only include things that might not spoil in the heat that Marina del Rey has this time of year. It was with this lack of foresight that triggered extra attention to Zayed’s 3rd story apartment balcony. I think that little presentation started to smell like something distinct…like a rotting corpse. That’s right. The clever little display neighbors had be either admiring or ignoring was none other than Mostafa Zayed with a hole shot through his eye, in plain view. Neighbors thought it was some sort of a gorey Halloween dummy slumped over a chair that had been up there since Monday and that’s why authorities weren’t called. Well, they weren’t too far off. Coroner’s officials were called to the apartment complex at 6:42 Thursday evening and a cause of death has not been announced. I’m betting it will include the hole through his head but I’m no expert.…

Lakeland, Florida A little after 3 pm on Monday, firefighters responded to a car fire on the Sunshine Skyway Bridge in Tampa, Florida. They had no way of knowing that they were about to drive up on an arson, a homicide, and a suicide. Court records show that Robert Laird and his wife, Sheryl, were divorced and she was granted an injunction keeping him from having contact with her. All who had contact with Sheryl describe her as being a positive woman despite the past marital problems and despite having to share her daughter with the man she feared. None of that matters now. Robert drove to the top of that bridge, doused the car with gasoline and turned it into a torch with his dead wife in the trunk, and lept from the bridge as the firefighters worked to extinguish the flames. And at 6 pm, their 7-year-old daughter was still sitting patiently waiting to be picked up from Happy Days School.…

Houston, Texas I hung out with some pretty heavy drinkers in my younger days. It was always quite a treat walking into a bar with someone who had obviously had a tremendous time the night – or even week – before. No sooner than we’d walk into the establishment, my buddy would be greeted with, “Oh man, do you remember when you_____?”  (Fill in the blank and those fill-ins were never flattering.)  Watching the happy-go-lucky face turn to complete horror was always amusing – mainly because it didn’t involve me. If I had my druthers, I’d much rather be informed by friends or acquaintances and I’d much rather hear the news when I was fully functioning than to be awakened by the police telling strange accounts of where I ended up and with whom.…

John Hawley Failed at Flying and Fleeing

October 12, 2009 at 3:06 am by  

Burlington, Vermont How many of you dreamt of flying when you were younger? Even better, how many of you actually tried to fly? I think the fantasy was always fueled by cartoons (in my day) and stuntmen with my children. Hollywood always makes things look so easy and always manage to trick the mind. Unless you’ve seen the making of a movie, you never see the landing platforms below. You just see some idiot jumping from the top of a building, landing smoothly, and walking away as though it were as natural as breathing in and out. It’s not, I can tell you that for sure. Even with a belly full of booze, jumping out of a high window is never really a cool idea – I tried it in college. But the alcohol and the fit of laughter kind of made our legs a bit unstable so it was nothing for them to revolt mid air and say “fuck you” as we were plummeting to the ground. But what happens when you’re all tense and you “need” to get away from say…the police?…

Lititz, Pennsylvania Facebook, the social networking site, started as a spin-off of Harvard University‘s Facemash. The creator, a little buzzed and a little bummed about being dumped by some chick, set out to divert his attention from her to something a bit more entertaining. What started as a prank has grown into the most widely used social site on the internet. The only requirements for signing up are to be at least 13 years old and have a valid email address. Being a little hesitant in jumping into the Facebook pool, I finally gave in when a friend urged me to sign up. It’s a quick and relatively painless way to keep up with family and friends. I can recall reading the status of one of my contacts that said: “My father has joined Facebook!” That’s sweet, but it’s not always that thrilling to have your parents create an account and “friend” you. Take it from a certain 13-year-old. Her father found her on Facebook after having no contact with her for 10 years and then found himself faced with a couple of charges, one being criminal attempted incest.…


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