LAS VEGAS, NV – Forget the WWE, forget MMA… if you want to see no-rules, no-hold-barred brutality, you don’t have to go further than the nearest Mickey D’s.

The customer isn’t always right. Sometimes you have to put them in their place. Sometimes you have to beat the shit out of them. At least that’s the operant management theory at this particular restaurant.

It all starts routinely enough: people are gorging themselves on McFoodProduct that is slowly killing them, disaffected employees are waiting for the school bell to ring, and a not-very-smart, too-cheap-for-her-own-good bit of fluff, Sabrinah Fontelar (pictured), is trying to pull the old “I just want a water cup so I can fill it with soda” routine.

The manager, Erika Chavolla, is wise to that old schtick, and shuts her down quick via the brilliant tactic of turning the soda machine right the hell off. That’s when the sparks start to fly, and that’s when our video starts.

Buffy Von Short-Shorts’ response is to go into a rage, hurling invectives, abuse, a McFry, and finally a McShake at the counter dwellers. The shake-flinging is where all hell breaks loose.

Lumbering like a moose bent on destruction, the Hulk (or his female counterpart) wades from behind the counter to do a little hands-on customer relations work.

Realizing that she done fucked up, Little Miss Thing whacks the Hulk right upside the head with a metal tray, which the Hulk shrugs off like a slap from a toddler. That’s about the last productive thing that Princess does.

The Hulk grabs her and begins beating her mercilessly, She lands a dozen of good whacks that have the woman’s titty pop out of her shirt, then throws her over a nearby table to get a better angle as other staff members struggle futilely to take the Hulk’s ragdoll away from her.

Chavolla’s boyfriend, who can be seen trying to calm her down, explained why he didn’t do more to stop the fight.

“I was not trying to stop it,” he said. “You don’t stop a big woman like that.

A smaller Hulk finally succeeds in pulling the punching bag away and gives her some really solid advice: “Stop!”

Miss Tube Top, brilliant tactician that she is, repays her rescuer with an elbow, whereupon she is beaten by the second employee and then tossed back into the waiting embrace of the Hulk for more attitude adjustment.

More beating and another table-slam later, the Hulk releases the now-vanquished wannabe soda-thief, admonishing her to “respect my momma.”

Always having to get in the last word, Stupid does the lion-tamer routine, picking up a chair and menacing the Hulk with it, only to have it taken away from her like a lollipop from a two-year-old.

Victorious and done with it, the Hulk returns the chair to its proper place, turns and saunters away, with Stupid following her like a yappy little dog that wants one last kick, and is determined to get it.

The curtain falls on the scene, leaving us to wonder what will become of them all, and how we will live with the uncertainty. All that said, no description can do the video itself justice.

Watch it, and bask in the glory of Superhero Justice. You deserve a break today.

The owner of the restaurant released a statement in which he says he and his team are investigating the incident, but as last week, Chavolla is still employed at the restaurant.

As for Fontelar, a spokeswoman for the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department confirmed she was issued a citation for misdemeanor battery.

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