BERKELEY COUNTY, SC – Police stop man in possession of six types of drugs and meth hidden in his ass.

Some people just want to catch a buzz, and simply will not be stopped.

Laws, common sense, the physical constraints of anatomy – none of these matter to the true buzz-hound, and a bona-fide Party Master will have a varied supply of stupefacients on hand at all times.

Case in point: Dwayne Gernard Wigfall. He has a black belt in Throwin’ The Fuck Down and packs the goods to prove it.

Wigfall was cruising down College Park Road in Berkeley County, SC a bit after midnight on a hot Tuesday night in June.

He was huffin’ on a blunt in a “spray painted 2002 Volvo” when he ran afoul of local law enforcement and pulled over for an unspecified moving violation.

Since cops can actually smell marijuana smoke (little known fact, but they can), things quickly went downhill, starting with the fact that Wigfall was driving on a suspended license.

A subsequent search of the vehicle would make any dragon-chaser drool: amphetamine, dexamphetamine, oxycodone, Clonazepam, MDMA, weed, and two powders that the cops couldn’t even identify.

Looking for that special house blend of pharmaceuticals to lullaby your ass off to the shores of the River Lethe? Wigfall’s got you.

It wasn’t until deputies booked Wigfall that they discovered his Master of Fun-Jitsu status, however.

Anyone who has ever made a habit of substance-juggling will tell you that a proper nightcap is the key to not going completely off the rails, and Wigfall had a master-grade pick-me-up plan: a prison-wallet full of meth.

While performing a routine booking search, buzz-kill staff at the Hill Finklea Detention Center would find a black bag in Wigfall’s ass, and nestled in that bag like a perverse set of Russian nesting dolls, were three other bags containing Wigfall’s ounce-and-a-quarter of wacky-dust.

And what’s worse than having the cops find your ass-stash? Well, not much, especially after they take it away and tack on charges.

When it was all said and done, Wigfall had six fresh new charges, including trafficking meth and possession of contraband by a prisoner. The infamous black bag can clearly be seen in the evidence photo at the link, along with an unexplained and vaguely disturbing Pez dispenser.

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