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HOLT, MI – A physicist at MCU has been charged with sodomizing a basset hound “with his hands and penis.”

In a press release, the Attorney General’s office said Joseph Hattey, 51, was charged with two counts of committing a crime against nature.

Reportedly, Hattey penetrated the animal with his hand and his penis.

The animal is currently in custody of Ingham County Animal Control. Officials say the incident did not happen on campus and the animal involved was not owned by the university.

Hattey worked as a radiation-safety technologist at the school for over four years before working as a physicist for the last two.

Hattey has not pleaded guilty to the charges and his lawyer says his client will explain the incident at his June 21st court hearing.

I absolutely cannot wait to hear his explanation.

MSU is still recovering from a previous sex-scandal involving Dr. Larry Nassar (who seemingly molested the entire Olympic gymnastics team under their watch).

So it’s understandable they issued the following statement to let everyone know how quickly they acted:

Michigan State University was informed by the MSU Police Department on April 17 of a criminal investigation against Joseph Hattey, a health physicist with the Environmental Health and Safety Unit (note this position does not work with students, patients or animals). Hattey was immediately put on administrative suspension, pending the investigation. The university has been and will continue to cooperate with law enforcement officials on this matter. MSUPD is providing digital forensic support in the investigation.

-Emily Guerrant, MSU Spokesperson

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