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Jesus BlowobEVERETT, PA – A 14-year-old boy is facing two years in jail after he simulated oral sex from a Jesus statue that, honestly, looked like it was made for something exactly like this.

The teen got himself in trouble after simulating the sex act with a statue that belongs to the Christian organization, Love in the Name of Christ. A friend of his snapped the photo in late July and then posted it on Facebook where it quickly went viral.

On Tuesday, police arrested the kid and charged him with, get this, desecrating a venerated object — a rarely used 1972 law. If he’s convicted, he could be looking at two years in juvenile jail. In case you are wondering, like I was, Pennsylvania law defines “desecration” as:

“Defacing, damaging, polluting or otherwise, physically mistreating in a way that the actor knows will outrage the sensibilities of persons likely to observe or discover the action.”

In other words, the teen hasn’t been been charged with damaging anything, he’s been charged for possibly offending a religious person by putting his crotch in the face of a Jesus statue.

I underlined that part because had the teen took the following picture, which could be deemed offensive to some, he would not have been charged as Ronald McDonald, surprisingly, is not considered a venerated object under the law.

This is hilarious because vandalism in Pennsylvania only carries a possible one year sentence. To put this in perspective, had the teen spray painted “Jesus Blows Toddlers” on the side of the local police station, he would have faced less time.

I could understand charging the kid had he damaged the stupid statue in some way, but charging him because he simulated a sex act with it? Absolutely ridiculous. It’s a waste of court time and taxpayer money.

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