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Naked Drunk Serenades Cops, Masturbates

January 30, 2013 at 4:36 am by  

Osmar HernandezGretna, LA — A 33-year-old New Orleans man is facing charges of obscenity and public intoxication after allegedly serenading police officers, while nude, and masturbating in their presence.

An obviously offended resident put in a call to 911 at about 9:30 Friday night to complain about a butt-nekkid pedestrian who appeared to be masturbating.

Officers caught up with the alleged wanker, identified as Osmar Hernandez,  in the 1500 block of Huey P. Long (tee-hee).

Police say Osmar was nekkid from the waist down and holding his shorts in his hand.

When asked if he would kindly re-clothe himself, Osmar reportedly ignored their commands. Instead, police say, he began singing and squeezin’ – his pud, that is.

Got my fingers crossed that the dash-cam video of this particular incident finds it’s way to national television.

Gretna Assistant Police Chief Anthony Christiana said officers did not recognize the tune.

Osmar eventually redressed and was promptly carted off to jail. Officers noted he had trouble keeping his balance and smelled of alcohol.

I wish the arresting officers had been able to pick up the tune… the curiosity is killing me.

Personally, I always sing this song while fappin’.

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