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Ocala, FL – Carlos Romero, 31, was arrested on Monday for allegedly having sex with 21-month old Doodle, his miniature donkey.  The charge is cruelty to animals.

Romero owns up to having “never been a people person,” and preferring animals, particularly horses, in almost every regard.  His reasons are simple.  People “stab you in the back, give you diseases, lie to you” and are “promiscuous,” whereas animals “are usually there for you” and “do not seek other pleasures.”  Their feelings, he said, are “100 percent honest.”

Sounds to me like Mr. Romero may be a bit of a selfish lover, or maybe he has a dream of fathering a centaur.

Romero purchased the aptly named Doodle from a man in Lake City several months ago, and though he admits to masturbating while the animal was in the room, claims to have never had intercourse with it, citing the fact that she is merely “blooming into maturity.”  So, you know, he’s claiming not to be bestial pedophile, which is a huge relief.

Romero’s assertion of restraint runs contrary to the Marion County Sheriff’s Office Deputy Edward Graham’s claim that he was lucky enough to witness Romero’s donkey-dipping schween doing its thing inside Doodle’s hoo-hah.

Romero calls Graham a “peeping tom” who should be arrested for invading his privacy.  Graham had the privilege of the coital exchange because he was investigating a claim by Gerald Joseph James, who rents a farm and says he saw Romero behind his donkey with his pants down on August 15th.

Romero was born and raised in Florida, but has worked at several racetracks around the country.  He says he’s thought an awful lot about sexing the horses he has encountered in his line of work, but that he hasn’t because he “didn’t want to have sex with the athlete that would suddenly be gone.”

In a jailhouse interview, he said he has had sex with horses since he was 18 and likes their “feminine shape, behavior and raw power.”  So, I can only guess that he’s been dunking his manwood in the non-athletic fillies, perhaps because they have softer, more supple curves.

“I’m not harming the animal or other people,” Romero, who is being held on $2,000 bail, said.

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