Arlington, Washington - On Monday Keira Earhart,38, pulled into his driveway to witness someone running from his house. He went inside to find his wife’s jewelry missing and called 911. Police arrived but after a search, were unable to find the burglar. A second 911 call was made a few hours later, Earhart telling police that the burglar was back in the area and that he had ran into a field near his house. Police arrived a second time, finding Earhart in the field, but once again they were not able to find the burglar. On Wednesday morning a neighbor called police saying he had found the body of a man in a creek near Monday’s burglary. The body was of a 25-year-old who had been shot to death. After a little investigating, police learn neighbors heard shots on Monday, before the second 911 call was placed. One reported Earhart told them he had taken “warning shots” at the burglar. Earhart was booked into jail facing second-degree murder charges. The dead man did have the stolen property in his possession.  Not sure if the Castle Doctrine applies in Washington, but even if it did I am pretty sure it doesn’t cover shooting a fleeing burglar in a field near your house three hours after the crime was committed. [Read more...]

SPOKANE, Washington – Caroline Francis was sitting at a light after leaving the YMCA last week when a large van with three men pulled up beside her and asked her to roll down her window. The passenger began asking for directions to a particular street. She tried giving them instructions, but started getting suspicious when they kept asking her questions. Their true intent became apparent when the light turned green. That’s when the passenger leaned out of his window and poured a 20-ounce bottle full of piss in her face. “I know this is really gross but I thought it was water and then I could smell it and it was all over me and I was freaking out shaking,” Carolinecaroline reviews said. “It got all over me, in my eye, in my mouth, all over my car.” Um. GAG. [Read more...]

WASHINGTON, Pennsylvania - A mother and daughter had just left the Jessop Employees Club in Washington after organizing a night of Bingo. The mother was carrying a briefcase full of the money the event had raised. Whatever amount of money was in that briefcase is unknown, but someone sure wanted it. Badly. They drove a white pickup truck on to the sidewalk, hitting the daughter. The person then got out of the truck, took the briefcase from the mother and drove off. “It should be safe to walk out of a place and have money . . . and not get run over by a vehicle coming down Jefferson Avenue,” said Jeff Savage, the victim’s brother. Indeed, Jeff Savage, indeed. Washington Mayor Anthony Spossey said the victims may have known the person who was driving the truck. [Read more...]

Spokane, Washington Situations like this next story are a prime example of the problems I have with the “insanity” plea. Instead of landing their sentence doing hard time in prison, those that are found to fit some state’s criteria of insane end up in a state run mental institution with many more liberties than are already afforded in our penile system today. And that’s saying a lot. Prisoners today don’t have it too bad. Those landed in the loony bin have it better. Plus, they don’t have to fuck for their drugs, the nurses just like give it to them. I think anyone that commits a crime punishable by time in jail has to be a little off their rocker thus rendering the “insanity” plea moot. But Phillip Paul’s performance was stellar and he was sentenced to a mental institution years ago yet he was totally in charge of his faculties enough to escape. [Read more...]

Washington, PA - Foreplay do – when in the mood, sweet nothings in his ear, a sly glance, and a fluttering of the eyelashes may relay to the object of your desire that you are in the mood for some nookie. Foreplay don’t – informing the object of your desire that if he doesn’t do you right now, you will cut his dick open and watch him bleed to death, right before you slap him across the face. While that may ‘do it’ for some men, *coughMorbidcough* one dude in particular had a problem with Samantha Harvey’s approach. On August 20, Samantha allegedly approached the 20-year-old male as he was getting ready for bed. After delivering her awesome come-on line, Samantha forced the man into her bedroom (I’m assuming the two are roommates), and ordered him to perform. To further entice him, she allegedly clipped a hot curling iron on to his ear.  [Read more...]

BATTLE GROUND, Washington -Another story of a loser jackass trying to abduct a teen girl off a public street and failing miserably. A 15-year-old girl was jogging when a man pulled up beside her in a silver pickup truck and accosted her at gunpoint, telling her to get into the vehicle. She decided she’s rather not and began screaming alerting a neighbor nearby. She broke free and the witness called police, giving a very detailed description of the vehicle and the man who sped off in it. Within minutes the truck was spotted and the driver, Matthew Ortiz, was arrested. [Read more...]

Lake Forest Park, WA- On July 21, a 15-year old girl met with 18-year old Victor Casarez Jr., who was a friend of hers from school, and they went to Casarez’s home where he lived with his father. During the visit, the girl drank a glass of juice and then the world went black. Hours later, she regained consciousness and found herself on a bed with her friend’s hairy pot-bellied 60-year old father, Victor Casarez Sr., on top of her. Her clothes had been removed and the old fart was busy taking lots of photographs while he raped her. The girl repeatedly begged Casarez Sr. about 20 times to get off of her, but he refused. After the assault, the elder Casarez threatened to post the photos and a video on the Internet if the girl told anyone about the incident. [Read more...]

Bremerton, Washington – It’s always humorous watching a child take the first steps, all wobbly and uncertain. And as adults we encourage this progress with claps of joy and cheering…not quite realizing what is around the corner. Once a baby becomes mobile, a household is never the same. The terrible twos. They’re only terrible because parents fail to understand the grinning faces quickly turn into 30 pounds of wrecking machinery. They leave no stone unturned, nothing untasted, and nothing left in drawers and cabinets they can open. “Baby proofing” devices are measures that keeps babies safe and drive adults insane. But the safety far out-weighs the frustration of keeping your treasure from getting hurt (your children) and your trinkets from being invaded. And any parent understands children do “surprise” easily when you venture in, catching them in the act, but they don’t startle to the point of sustaining injuries that would cause brain death. [Read more...]

Spanaway, WA - Back in February, Jeffrey Smiley was arrested on charges of first-degree child molestation. See, his mother believes that Smiley sexually assaulted his two adoptive sisters between September 2006 and June 2007 – the girls were 5 and 9 at the time. The allegations of abuse came to light when the younger girl told her mother that while Smiley was babysitting for them one evening, he exposed himself to her, fondled her, and took naked pictures of her. However, when the girl, who is said to be developmentally delayed, was interviewed by police, she clammed up and failed to disclose any abuse. Nothing more was done at the time. A month later, the child repeated the allegations against Smiley. This time, her older sister piped in with her own story of sexual abuse. She broke down in tears, admitting that she, too, had been molested by her adoptive brother. Investigators felt they had enough to charge Smiley, so they did. Unfortunately, Smiley was released on a PR bond – he was free to go on a couple of conditions: he was instructed to have no contact with minor children and to stay away from school grounds and/or playgrounds. Well, wouldn’t you know it? Smiley don’t follow directions. [Read more...]

Puyallup, Washington–On May 16, a couple of 12-year-old boys were sitting on a bench outside of a Safeway store, grubbin’ on some candy, when they were approached by 3 grown men. The men asked the two boys if they would perhaps part with some of the sugar-coated sweets. The boys obliged, and handed over a share of their delectable confectioneries. Sated, the older men walked away leaving the boys to continue with the snarfing of their bountiful banquet. Perhaps the men were worried the youngsters would ruin their dinner with all of that yummy goodness, because they returned about 15-minutes later and demanded that the boys hand over all the candy. And all of the contents of their pockets. And their cell phones. [Read more...]

McCleary, WA–McCleary, with a population of 1,550, is a town where most residents feel comfortable allowing their children to play outside until dark. In a town that size, everybody knows everybody and there are very few secrets between neighbors. Needless to say, residents in that tiny town are in shock over the disappearance of 10-year-old Lindsey Baum. Lindsey was visiting a friend’s home FridayFriday reviews evening… her friend’s father, Scott Williams, said he asked Lindsey to go home before it got too dark. “She was here 10, 15 minutes, and then, you know, we said, ‘You should probably get going before it gets dark,’ and that was the last we heard of her,” he said. She was last seen at about 9:15 p.m., as she set off to walk the four blocks to her home…a 10-minute walk. Lindsey never made it home. [Read more...]

Black Diamond, WA –  Christopher Wise, 41, was a lazy son who didn’t have a job and lived with his mother.  That alone isn’t a crime, but allowing Ruby Wise, 88, to slowly starve to death is.  He lived downstairs while his mother was confined to the upstairs of their home.  Out of sight doesn’t always mean out of mind. Wise’s mother began to wail and moan in pain.  He bought himself a pair of earplugs.  Her cries of pain and anguish went on for hours, for days, neighbors were disturbed. [Read more...]

Gig Harbor, WA- The wife of 37-year old Bonifacio Velarde says he was beginning to have increasing attacks of rage and would break things like chairs and glasses. On May 18, Velarde allowed his terrible temper to get the best of him when he took his anger out on the couple’s 3-week-old baby daughter. [Read more...]

Federal Way, Washington–I must admit, I have a very vivid imagination. Too vivid. When I come across stories like this, they play out in my head, over and over, in high def…whether I want them to or not. It’s a curse. Shit like this keeps me up at night, my brain buzzing with questions. My biggest question, in this case, is…Timothy, do you take your little show on the road? I’d pay handsomely if you would show up at my upcoming family reunion. [Read more...]