Columbus, Ohio – I so tried to get this story up on FridayFriday reviews, but shit just didn’t work out that way. But man, oh man, just when you think you have heard it all on this site you come across a story about an elderly man punching random kids at a Wal-mart.  Sixty-eight-year-old Ralph Conone was arrested at a Columbus Walmart Wednesday after a mother busted him popping her kid in the back of the head when she wasn’t looking. After her crying son told her what Conone had done, she followed him outside and brought him back into the store. Police were called, surveillance footage reviewed and sure enough, Conone could be seen punching multiple kids in the back of the head when their guardians were not looking. To make matters worse, he would punch them with keys protruding between his fingers. [Read more...]

Houston, Texas – Portia Thompson, 20, is fighting for her life in a Memorial Hermann Hospital after being run over in a Walmart parking lot on the day before Thanksgiving. Police are looking for the driver of a Dodge Durango who was fighting with Thompson over a parking space before the driver of the SUV ran over her. Her brother, who was in the car with her at the time, states that, “He tells my little sister to get out of the car.  She didn’t get out of the car, so they get out with blades. They’re waving their knives.” After she eventually got out of the car, “the SUV pulls around and rams her,” said her brother. Continue on to watch 30 minutes of raw video that shows a memorial held at the Wal-Mart parking lot as well as her brother giving a detailed description of what happened that day. Deservedly or not, the race card is thrown on the table as well. On a more personal note, if I am ever killed in a Walmart parking lot, do NOT hold a memorial service there. If you need to hold some type of memorial service, pick a nice park that has those grills you can use to cook hamburgers and shit.
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WESTMINSTER, Colorado – On September 19th, witnesses inside a Walmart in Westminster say they saw Kevin Salyers sexually assault a young girl, pick her up and try to flee the store. I say “try” because Kevin never made it out of the store. This was due to 22-year-old Cameron Aulner, who was working the Comcast table at the front of the store. He heard people yelling for someone to stop 34-year-old Salyers, but since no one was doing so, he tackled Salyers himself and helped hold him there until police arrived. Oh, forgot to mention, Aulner is in a wheelchair. “It was something that happened so fast, I didn’t even think about it,” Aulner said Tuesday. “I’m not a hero. I just did what you’re supposed to do.” Yeah man, you really did. Read on to check out some video.
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Elizabethton, TN – Megan Cullop was planning on doing some redecorating – so, on Monday afternoon, she loaded up her kid and headed for the nearest WalMart. After filling her shopping cart with the must-haves, she made a beeline for the door – completely bypassing the cash registers. Alert security personnel caught up with Megan at the door, took away her shopping cart, more than likely lectured her on the evils of shoplifting, and let her go. Now, if Megan had even half a brain cell bumping around in her vacant little noggin, she would have realized how lucky she was that the cops weren’t called in and chalked it up as a lesson learned. But, seeing as how she is gracing the pages of the Dreamin’ Demon, you know that wasn’t the case. [Read more...]

Monticello, NY On Saturdays around the county, Walmart parking lots are buzzing with cars circling to get the closest space to one of the many entrances. People come crowding in to spend their hard earned money on the “Always Low Prices” but unfortunately SaturdaySaturday reviews, in Monticello, NY, shoppers arriving for the afternoon bargains were turned away – the store had unexpectedly closed for several hours. What a bummer for Cory Clarke, a father who had his two children for his first paternal visitation. He put his 7 month-old daughter Brook and 18 month-old son (?) Charley in a double stroller and trekked roughly 3 miles to the spend some quality time in Walmart with his children. One problem, after he finished with the checkout line, his load was approximately 17 pounds lighter, little Brook was gone. [Read more...]

Marietta, GA- Shortly after midnight on June 6, Lashaundra Cooper, 23, went to her local Wal-Mart to do some shopping. Actually, she went to do some shoplifting, but that is not the reason this ignorant bitch is gracing our front page. When Wal-Mart security caught Cooper trying to leave the store with about $25 in new duds for herself, they immediately called the police. After the officers arrived and placed the thieving twit under arrest for her unsuccessful five-finger discount, she informed them that she had left her two sons alone in her car. [Read more...]