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GLENDALE, AZ – Police have arrested a man accused of pissing on a family of three at a Metallica concert.

A man, his wife, and their 10-year-old daughter were attending a Metallica concert at the University of Phoenix when they “felt warm liquid washing over their backs and legs.”

When the man turned around, he saw 44-year-old Daniel Daddio holding his dick. When he asked why in the hell did he just piss on his family, he told police Daddio simply shrugged.

The man showed a hell of a lot more restraint than I would have, and reported the incident to stadium employees. Police were called to the scene and located an intoxicated Daddio, who denied urinating on the family.

He was taken into custody and charged with indecent exposure and disorderly conduct. When Daddio appeared in court for the first time, the judge was not too pleased with the allegations against him.

“I have to say in the 15 years I’ve been on the bench, this is one of the most disgusting scenarios I’ve ever read… in any event, really inappropriate,” the judge told the court.…

Jeff RubinPORTLAND, OR – Police arrested 27-year-old Jeff Rubin on Friday after he allegedly pissed all over fellow passengers on JetBlue flight.

According to witnesses, Rubin had been sleeping for the majority of the flight from Anchorage, but about 30 minutes before landing, “he stood up and began urinating through the crack of the seat onto the passengers seated in front of him.”

But Rubin wasn’t finished. As he was pissing on the passengers in front of him, Rubin lost his balance and fell backwards and “urinate(d) upwards which got the passengers and seats next to him as well as some other passengers’ personal belongings.”

After the plane landed, Port of Portland Police boarded and found Rubin passed out in his seat. An officer then began interviewing passengers. “At one point, the officer was like, ‘Who got peed on?“‘ said Suzanna Caldwell, who was sitting two rows in front of Rubin.

The way she describes it, no one yelled or screamed after getting pissed on, which turns the entire thing into something hilarious (to me, not the people he pissed on) into something, well, kinda odd.…

Charles WeatherfordEVANSVILLE, IN – Police have arrested 84-year-old Charles Weatherford after he admitted dumping a bowl of piss on the head of a 13-year-old boy.

The incident happened Saturday afternoon, when Weathford called police to report a 13-year-old boy had vandalize his front walkway by smashing some landscaping bricks.

While police were there taking the report, they noted a strong smell of urine but could not determine the source.

The source of that smell would reveal itself after they were called back to the location by the mother of the boy who allegedly vandalized Weatherford’s walkway. She was calling to report Weathford had assaulted her snowflake with urine.

The 13-year-old told police he’d got into an argument with Weatherford, an argument that ended with Weatherford dumping a bowl full of piss on his head from Weatherford’s his second-floor balcony.

Police wrote in their report that while the teen was talking to them, he “had a strong smell of urine emanating from his person.”

That visual is hilarious to me — a sulking teen having to talk to police covered in stinking piss because his mother wouldn’t let him wash it off so there would be proof of the act.…

Nicholas StewartBlackpool, England – Nicholas Stewart, 35, was arrested after he was caught selling imitation bottles of whiskey and vodka that only consisted of watered-down urine and feces.

Stewart mainly targeted tourists at a slot machine complex in Blackpool, charging them $15 a bottle. According to Blackpool Council prosecutor Victoria Cartmell, a lab analysis of the bottles contents showed that the bottles were nothing more than water colored by mother nature’s home-brewed food coloring; shit and piss.

“They were purported to contain whiskey and vodka, but they were water laced with urine and feces — probably to give the so-called whiskey color. They were totally unsuitable for public consumption — they were hazardous and contained dangerous e-coli bacteria.”

Stewart’s ingenuity, he claims, was only an attempt to get money to feed himself. He pled guilty to a charge of fraud and was sentenced to a jail term of 70 days suspended for a 12 month period. He will serve no time behind bars, though he was deemed “a danger to public health.”

Authorities are seeking to get a Criminal Anti-Social Behavior Order that would prevent Stewart from being able to sell anything in Blackpool ever again…including newspapers.…

piss mopMIDDLETOWN, CT – Middletown police have arrested a 22-year-old Charles Stack after they said he emptied a container of urine on a female housemate.

Police said Stack and the woman live in the same building and that Stack went to the woman’s room last week with a container full of urine.

When the woman opened her door, Stack emptied the container o’ piss on her, covering her clothing, body, face and room.

Sounds like Stack had been saving up for this occasion, and possibly doubling down on the asparagus intake, because police reported the room was covered with an “extremely large quantity” of urine that had an “extremely strong odor.”

The woman told police that Stack has never liked her and often curses at her. She also said Stack once threatened to kick her in the head. Police tried to talk to Stack, but he’d locked himself in his bedroom.

After the landlord unlocked the door, police found Stack on his bed with a sheet pulled up over his head.…

John PoseyParagould, AR — A 65-year-old man was jailed last weekend after he allegedly walked into a Radio Shack and started pissing all over the place.

When police made contact with the alleged pisser, John Posey, he appeared to be intoxicated. His eyes were bloodshot, he was unsteady on his feet, and he apparently reeked of booze. Oh yeah, and his fly was unzipped. Dead giveaway….

Posey initially told police he was just doing a little shopping and denied urinating on stuff. The officer called bullshit after being directed to a large, stinky wet spot on the carpet.

Posey eventually ‘fessed. When questioned as to why he didn’t just use the friggin’ restroom, Posey reportedly stated that “stores usually won’t let you, so I didn’t ask.” And well, he had to “pee bad.” Logic.

A Radio Shack employee told police that Posey caused about $800 in damages – his urine landed on some boxes containing televisions and various audio equipment. In addition to that, some carpet tiles are going to need replacing….…

Harlem HospitalNew York, NY – A 45-year-old patient at Harlem Hospital Center was sexually assaulted and urinated on by another patient after she fell asleep in the emergency room.

The woman was at the hospital Friday for a hurt foot and dozed off after being administered some painkillers. She awoke to find 49-year-old Tyrone Brown in a hospital gown “rubbing his penis on her mouth,” said the woman’s niece.

When the woman tried to get out of the bed she felt “a hot splash” and realized Brown was now pissing on her. Alerted to the woman’s screams, hospital staff rushed over and subdued Brown, who was at the hospital for an unknown injury.

As Brown was being led away, he reportedly flicked his tongue at his victim. Tyrone Brown has been charged with committing a criminal sex act and taken to Bellevue Hospital for a psychiatric evaluation. Brown has an arrest record stretching back to 1981, including grand larceny, criminal possession of stolen property.

“This incident will be fully investigated,” said a hospital spokeswoman.…

coffeeST. JOSEPH, MO – A 16-year-old Central High School student was charged in juvenile court with third degree assault, after taking a piss in a coffee pot used by school faculty.

The incident happened in March, when some teachers who drank the coffee reported that the coffee tasted funny.

“A report was made that it tasted like chemical or cleaner – I’m not sure what the word was,” said St. Joseph Superintendent of Schools Dr. Melody Smith.  “There seemed like this personal coffee pot in a storage room, that the coffee tasted strange.”

An internal investigation was launched that included reviewing footage, frame by frame, from a hidden surveillance camera in the faculty room. Three weeks later, school staff were finally able to find the 16-year-old student responsible for tainting the coffee, and exactly what they’d tainted it with.

After notifying police, the teen was arrested and charged with third degree assault. If he’s convicted in juvenile court, he’s facing anywhere from probation, to being removed from his home and placed in a residential facility.…

St. Croix County, WI – Two sisters in Wisconsin have been charged after a man accused them of sexually assaulting him with pliers and forcing him to drink their urine. Does this sound odd to you? If not, it means that you are ideally suited to sort this one out.

Court documents say that an 18-year-old male was at a Wisconsin residence with Valerie M. Bartkey, 24, and Amanda L. Johnson, 17. Whatever fun they were having reportedly ended when the sisters – who had reportedly imbibed some weed – began punching and kicking him, and then – gasp – putting one of the man’s shoes in the toilet and soaking the other in a sink.

According to court records, the man said the sister’s funfest continued when they later brought him a cup of liquid claiming that was lemonade and ‘forced’ him to drink it. It reportedly turned out to be a cup of the sisters’ urine.

Police say that the man went on to say that the sisters then ‘forced him to undress,’ with the intent of Bartkey having sex with him.…

Fredericksburg, VA – Daryl Haynes, 31, got himself in a bit of trouble after deciding to take a piss in the corner of a yard this past week. Seems innocent enough…

It all began at about 10:50AM on Thursday when – according to a police spokesperson – an off-duty Fredericksburg Police Deputy observed Haynes urinating in the back corner of a neighbor’s yard.

The deputy, Officer Billy Reyes, said that he had just finished mowing his lawn and, at first, decided to ignore the public urination. Then he reportedly saw Haynes shaking his penis while talking loudly to some people across the street from him. Not good. The deputy said that Haynes behavior upset him, in part, because “there are children in the neighborhood.”

Officer Reyes said he confronted the Haynes. Haynes – clearly an expert at diffusing awkward situations – responded by swearing at Reyes and threatening bodily harm. Officer Reyes then reportedly informed Haynes he was a law enforcement officer. Haynes responded by throwing several unlanded punches at Officer Reyes.…

Columbus, OH – Alan D. Patton, a 59-year-old drinker of young boy’s piss, is back in custody after violating his probation.  He is accused of repeatedly calling, harassing and threatening his probation officer.

Patton also reportedly tested positive for methamphetamine use.  For this, Municipal Judge David P. Sunderman has ordered him back to the Delaware County jail where he is being held without bail.

The probation that Patton is serving is part of a sentence in February when Patton was accused of collecting young boys’ urine in a Burger King toilet with the intent to drink it.

Have it your way, Alan…

Patton has a long and distiguished history with Ohio Law Enforcement – with a criminal record dating to 1978.  His charges include voyeurism, public indecency, criminal mischief and rape – all apparently related to an admitted urine fetish.

Highlights include:

In 1993, Patton was arrested for fondling boys while trying to collect urine at the Magic Mountain Fun Center. He was designated a sex offender when convicted in that case and served nearly five years in prison.…

An 18-year-old member of the U.S. Ski Team got himself into a little trouble the other day after he drunkenly pissed on the leg of an 11-year-old passenger during a JetBlue flight to New York.

Witnesses say that during a red-eye flight from Oregon, Robert Vietze, of Warren, Vt.,  got up and staggered five rows behind him before pulling out his junk and pissing on a young girl’s leg.

Vietze had to be separated from the child’s father, a Stage 4 cancer patient, who had left the girl alone while he correctly used the bathroom and returned to find Vietze pissing on his daughter’s leg.

“F- -k that kid. I don’t want him near my family!” the understandably enraged man reportedly yelled.

Vietze admitted to law-enforcement authorities that he had consumed more than eight alcoholic beverages before he relieved himself on the girl and that he didn’t realize what he was doing.

Vietze was initially issued a federal summons for indecent exposure, but federal prosecutors dropped the case, possibly because the girl’s father refused to let her be interviewed by cops.…

Jupiter, FL — Angela Henderson, 35, was taken into custody last week after police learned she had been denying her three children access to the toilet and forcing them to urinate in bowls.

The children’s father called police after he reportedly received numerous phone calls and text messages from his children complaining that they weren’t allowed to use the restroom.

According to the police report, Henderson turned off the toilet water valves, and the children said she forced them to drink Gatorade so they would have to urinate more. Police believe Henderson may have been collecting the urine for a drug test.

She denied collecting the urine for a drug test, further stating that she didn’t even need to be tested. When asked why she had shut off the water to the two toilets in the home, Henderson replied that both were clogged. But both toilets operated as the should have once the deputies turned the valves back on.

A search of the residence turned up an unknown amount of marijuana, drug paraphernalia and two bottles of orange Gatorade.…

Rock Hill, SC — Police have arrested a 35-year-old man after they say after beating a woman, he pissed on her.

On Friday morning, police were called to a couple’s home and once there, heard a female inside yelling for help. When officers went inside the home, they found a woman with wet hair yelling “He pee’d on me!!” according to the police report.

She informed them that after Anthony Sharif Sanders, the father of her two kids, punched and kicked her, he then turned her into a piss mop with a healthy stream of urine to her face. After noting the woman had swelling under her right eye and forehead to go along with her wet hair and face, they arrested Sanders.

Sanders was charged with aggravated assault/criminal domestic violence and possession of marijuana after admitting to owning the five grams of weed police found in the home.

Seeing this happened in Rock Hill, SC I’m surprised the father of her two kids was actually in the home. However, seeing this happened in Rock Hill, SC, I’m not surprised that the woman with wet hair and smelling of piss had to specifically point out to police that she’d been urinated on.…

Batavia, NY — Dan Sumeriski, 25, of Batavia was jailed after the manner in which he handled a disagreement with his girlfriend caused a probable revocation to his parole.

Sumeriski, who goes by the Myspace handle “iputtheFUinfun,” was reportedly engaged in a dispute with his girlfriend during which he shoved her. She may have been willing to overlook that transgression, but he then reportedly took her cell phone and urinated on the interior of her car – prompting her to file a police report.

Sumeriski is charged with petit larceny, second-degree harassment and third-degree criminal tampering. Because he was out on parole after being jailed for a past DWI offense, this peeing-in-a-car stunt may give Sumeriski more than he bargained for. To start that ball rolling, he was held at the Genesee County Jail on a parole warrant. Girlfriend: 1, Sumeriski: 0.

Sumeriski is schedule to appear June 13 in Batavia Town Court.…

Las Vegas, NV — If you happen to know where Herman Lolong is, hide your drink and call the cops.

In 2008, Lolong worked for Jackpot Sanitation – a port-a-john supplier in the Las Vegas area. Amber Estrada reported to Lolong while working for Jackpot as a sales representative. Estrada claims that her troubles began after she complained of having to endure a hostile work environment with Lolong as her chief harasser.

Astonishingly, according to court records, Jackpot Sanitation upper management responded to Estrada’s complaints by reassigning her in 2009 to an isolated office with one other coworker and Lolong as their boss.

“I don’t understand why I have to be over there. I’m uncomfortable. You guys know how I feel about him.” Estrada recalled saying. She described their response as telling her to “just make the best of it.”

Not long after the reassignment, Estrada noticed that the drinks she kept in her personal office refrigerator had a peculiar odor and taste, court documents state.

“It happened so many times that, when it happened to my water, it was undeniable because water has no taste.…

Middletown Township, PA — A Jack & Jill ice cream truck was pulled over Friday evening, and not because the officer had a sudden craving for a Choco Taco, but because police had received phone calls about its erratic operation. The driver, an independent contractor, was found to be drunk. What was subsequently discovered, though, is what will undoubtedly give you pause the next time you dig into a nice cup of lemon-flavored Italian Ice.

Yassir Hassan, 46 years old and classy as hell, had several boxes of wine – which still makes as much sense to me as the idea of french fries served in a shoe – on board his truck. Also uncovered were three bottles of urine – which now makes as much sense to me as the idea of wine in a box – one of which was found frozen in the same freezer as actual food. One thing they say Hassan didn’t have was any sort of hand-washing facility on board.

Despite a preliminary DUI hearing in his future, as of now there’s not a damn thing stopping Hassan from grabbing his truck and selling ice cream.…

Sanford, FL — Authorities are asking for the public’s help in identifying the slob pictured to the left. You see, the police would like to talk to said slob about a recent incident involving his urine and 100+ packages of cough drops.

Police say the man entered a Walgreens late Thursday night and headed directly to the aisle where the cough drops are kept. As is apparent in the attached video, the nasty pig glances around, unzips his fly and pisses on about 110 packages of cough drops.

Police say the man then walked back to the pharmacy and tried to have a prescription filled but didn’t have the proper documents. Denied, he and his empty bladder then exited the store.

Police were called after an employee stocking shelves in that particular aisle smelled urine and discovered the puddle. The estimated damage to the cough drops is about $300.

“He went to the pharmacy and tries to get a prescription but doesn’t have the right paperwork. That’s OK, at times you won’t have the right things, but he does not appear to be drunk or intoxicated,” said Sgt.…

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