Model Marine Beats A Priest With A Tire Iron

Tampa, Florida – A Greek Orthodox priest, Alexios Marakis, 29, was visiting St. Nicholas Greek Cathedral in Tarpon Spings. He was in Tampa to visit a fellow priest but got lost downtown. So he pulled into an apartment complex and approached a young man to ask for directions. Sadly, he asked a complete tool named Jasen D. Bruce – a Marine reservist. Instead of directions, Marakis got Bruce’s tire iron upside his head. Bruce then chased Marakis for three blocks while Bruce called 911 saying that he was trying to apprehend a terrorist. When police arrived on the scene they say Bruce told them he heard the man say “Allahu Akbar” and then added “That’s what they say before they blow you up.” Classic. When he was informed that the man he had beaten was a priest, Bruce started crying. Jasen Bruce was charged with aggravated battery with a deadly weapon. [Read more...]

Amer Ejak And Christopher Cox Are Show-Offs

TAMPA, FL -  Got a couple of geniuses for you in a story from out of Florida. Amer Ejak, 16, and Christopher Cox, 22, were inside the apartment of 34-year-old Thomas Johannesen’s apartment on Thursday or FridayFriday reviews. Cox instructed Ejak to hit Johannesen over the head with a whiskey bottle, which he did. Johannesen fell to the floor and then moved to the couch by the two men. Ejak then put a plastic bag over Johannesen’s head and tied a belt around his neck. After murdering Johannesen, they moved his body into a closet. When they left, they took Johannesen’s cell phone, sneakers, and house keys. These two idiots couldn’t contain themselves and a short time later started asking people if they had ever seen a dead body before. They brought two people to the apartment and showed them Johannesen’s corpse.  One of those people told a third person, who then called the cops. [Read more...]

Stormy Daniels For US Senate 2010!

Tampa, Florida – A lot of men out there already know the name, but for you women, Stormy Daniels (Stephanie Gregory Clifford) is the award-winning adult film star who has starred in such classics as Space Nutz, Camp Cuddly Pines and one of my personal favorites, Titsicle. Recently, a group of fans are attempting to recruit Daniels to run against Republican Senator David Vitter in Louisiana in 2010. The official website for this movement states that Daniels is “A champion of entrepreneurism, a fighter for decency and the embodiment of pure libertarianism. Stormy Daniels will be a tireless champion for the forthright values of common sense and do-it-yourself individualism.” She’sShe reviews a fighter alright. On July 25th, Daniels was arrested for beating her spouse in a fit of rage. [Read more...]

Things Not Looking Good For Christopher Coleman

COLUMBIA, Illinois - Christopher Coleman is the man whose family was found dead in their home on May 5th. Coleman claimed to have been at a local gym when he called for a wellness check after not being able to contact his wife. Police found Sheri Coleman, 31 dead along with her two boys, Garett, 11, and Gavin, 9. They had all been strangled to death. Since then, it has come to light that Coleman had some trim on the side and now he has given his fingerprints to police.Anyone want to take a guess on when they charge this guy? [Read more...]