Bungling Burglar Calls 911 After Locking Self Inside Dollar Tree
February 1, 2013 at 12:53 pm by Jaded
North Bend, OR — According to North Bend Police, a 45-year-old woman (45? Really?) called 911 to report she was locked inside a Dollar Tree store.
The call came in just after 3:00 Tuesday morning, police say.
When officers arrived at the store located in the Pony Village Mall, they say they found Darlene Huntley, yes… 45, locked inside.
No word on how she entered the store or why she didn’t just break a damn window to get out.
After a thorough investigation, Huntley was arrested and charged with second degree burglary and second degree criminal trespass, among other charges.
Huntley was transported to the Coos County Jail. No information on the bond/bail amount.
Even worse, they brought the ban hammer down. Hard. Huntley has been banned from the Pony Village Mall for LIFE! *insert echo here*
This, of course, brings to mind another Dollar Tree story we covered.
Back in 2011, we featured Shane Chavis – a man accused of holing up in the bathroom of an Arizona Dollar Tree.…
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Augusta, Ga – While I hate obnoxious drunks, I do love them when they are on fire because at least then they are as entertaining as they think they are. So I’d have loved to gave been at Allie Katz Bar Friday night where a drunk, 36-year-old William Bonner, talked his friends into pouring Bacardi 151 on his head and then set him on fire.
You can watch the video below and hopefully you will get as much laughter out of it as I did when the flames turn Bonner into Ghost Rider and can be seen stumbling into a table while his friends toss drinks into his face. At this point I would’ve helped toss some things in Bonner’s face as well, starting with the darts. You know, for the comedic value.
Bonner was rushed to the hospital in critical condition but released on Sunday. Police got involved because his friends called them saying that Bonner had gotten into a fight at the bar and his assailants had set the man on fire. Of course the surveillance footage shows the truth, and a metric ton of stupidity.…
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PHOENIX, AZ – A mother was arrested Saturday night after she drove drunk and crashed her vehicle with two children inside, leaving one of them behind when she fled from the scene.
Carla Flanagan, 34, allegedly drove drunk with her 5-year-old daughter and a friend’s 8-year-old son in the car when she collided with another vehicle Saturday night.
The accident injured the boy and left Flanagan with a bloody face, but that didn’t stop her from grabbing her daughter and take off running, leaving the 8-year-old behind.
Officers said they found Flanagan hiding under an apartment complex stairwell. She admitted to drinking four beers before she got behind the wheel with the two children.
Flanagan was booked into jail for aggravated DUI, aggravated DUI with a passenger under 15, failure to stay, and endangerment. She’s unable to post the $7,500 bond. To top things off, she wasn’t supposed to be driving even had she not been drinking, as she was driving on a suspended license.
Her sister spoke to reporters about the incident, saying that there is no excuse for what her sister did, but that the blame should go to the person who gave her sister the keys.…
Continue ReadingTwo Men Arrested After Trying To Rob Sheriff In Bogus Craigslist Sale
September 20, 2010 at 2:02 pm by Morbid
BOISE, Idaho — Two men accused of using Craigslist to rob a man earlier in the month have been apprehended after attempting to pull the stunt on a County Sheriff. Dominic Hinton, 20, and Roman Nazarko, 19, have been accused of robbing a man who thought he was meeting the pair to buy an iPad they had advertised on Craigslist. Instead, after showing up at the designated meeting spot, he was robbed of his money at gunpoint. The duo tried a second time, this time advertising an Apple laptop for sale. Too bad for them that Sheriff Gary Raney was in the market for one. Raney became suspicious after the seller tried to change their meeting spot from a gated community to a darkened parking lot. He called police and notified them that he may be getting robbed. When he arrived at the new address, he saw the seller sitting on a rock dressed like an evil ninja. Police were there in no time, and the seller attempted to flee the scene, but he and his accomplice were apprehended.…
Continue ReadingMan Charged With Raping Teen Now Charged With Hiring Fellow Inmate To Kill Her
September 18, 2010 at 12:54 pm by Morbid
MILWAUKEE, Wisonsin – A man waiting in jail on sex assault charges just added a couple more felonies under his belt after trying to hire another inmate to kill his victim so they could not testify. Sunil Singh was accused of getting a 14-year-old drunk back in March before raping and beating her in the basement of an apartment building. While awaiting trial, police say that Singh enlisted the help of another prisoner in an effort to win his case — by killing the teen victim. Investigators have recordings of Singh telling the other inmate to “kill her, throw her in the garbage.” He explains that without the witness to testify against him, “I win my case.” As payment, Singh gave the man the combination to a safe located in the gas station where he used to work. Singh now adds two more felony charges under his belt and the possible addition of 18 years in prison.…
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South Windsor, Conn. – A lot of people are already aware of this, but from my experiences, anyone who is middle-aged and still abusing drugs are a sad lot. They usually operate at a fraction of their potential as they try to hang on to days gone by or follow the vicious circle of abusing drugs and alcohol just to cope with their life corrupted because of drugs and alcohol. But on top of all that, they are usually pretty stupid. Case in point, 43-year-old Kendl Murphy. After a weekend of partying, she made a stop at her local bank’s drive-up teller to make a deposit. What she didn’t realize was that she had forgot to remove the cocaine filled baggie from the deposit envelope she gave them. Bank staff asked Murphy to wait for her transaction, then called police. Murphy was charged with possession of narcotics and released on a $1,000 bond. Police Sgt. Scott Custer said when Murphy was questioned, she admitted the cocaine was hers and that she had forgot it was in the envelope.…
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UNIONTOWN, Pa. — The father of a Menallen Elementary kindergarten student is in jail after police say he went to his son’s school to retrieve four ounces of pot he had stashed in his son’s Elmo backpack. It all started when Ronald Washington, 33, called the school to check if his son had arrived their safely. He then called back a second time and said he was on his way to retrieve something from his kid’s backpack. The school administration became suspicious and decided to check inside the bag themselves, and there along with the boy’s homework, was a couple sacks of weed. By time Washington got to the school, police were already there waiting for him and he was arrested. His sister states this is all a big mistake. “I’m taken back by it,” she said. “I believe it was a mistake. He’s raising two kids by himself and he does pretty well as a father, single parent. So I think it was a mistake, I don’t think it was his and that’s the truth.…
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Cudjoe Key, Florida - I have always wanted to use that headline. Never really thought I would get to, but thanks to 37-year-old Megan Mariah Barnes I get to cross something off my list. Police say that she was driving to meet her boyfriend and wanted to make sure her vagina didn’t look like a panting dog, so she got her former husband to hold the steering wheel while she shaved her bikini line. This resulted in the pair running into the back of a pickup truck whose two passengers receiving minor injuries. Barnes was charged with driving with a revoked license, reckless driving, driving with no insurance, and of leaving the scene of a wreck with injuries. Yes, a revoked license. See, the day before Barnes had lost her license for five years because of drunk driving. She faces up to a year in jail. Traffic cop Gary Dunick said: “If I wasn’t there, I wouldn’t have believed it. Nothing will ever beat this.”
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Here we are at the end of another day and believe it or not, I actually got out of my recliner to accomplish something. No, I didn’t front page an article. I ran around town buying up all the vienna sausages to horde in preparation for the Swine Flu outbreak. I hate vienna sausages, but Morbid loves them. I figured that if I was going to die, I would die doing what I love the best, making Morbid suffer. For you, today’s Daily Bite is full of stupid and fail. Have a chuckle at other people’s expense while I bury these hundreds of cans of disgusting meat sticks.…
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I’m in the mood to write up some stories today, so gleaning the headlines for anything interesting to me (because really, does anyone else actually matter?) here is one that I felt worth noting.
LATROBE, Pa. - On Saturday, at around 2 in the afternoon, 17-year-old Wesley Kimmick was messing with something that blew him the fuck up. Surprisingly, he is currently alive and in the hospital. Officials have not officially released what they explosive item may have been, but whatever it was, Kimmick has now lost a right hand and his left leg. …
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Mary Deoleo (Myspace) and Brianna
Hazleton, PA – Mary Deoleo, 21, is a young single mother to three-year-old Brianna. And sometimes young mothers do stupid things, especially if there isn’t a lot going on upstairs to begin with. But letting your baby walk around for a week with a burn that covered her entire right butt cheek? Not taking the child to the doctor? Waiting until the burn stuck to Brianna’s clothes and broke open every time she moved? Not even giving your baby a Tylenol to help with the pain?
That’s not stupidity, denizens. That’s some serious bullshit parenting, right there. And the Hazleton Police Department agrees with me. …
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Salem, OR - Vincent Gallagher, 47, was trippin’ on shrooms and hittin’ the bong last week. No big thing, right? Just a cool old biker hippie dude, hanging out, telling recovery to bite his ass. Except that he had a bad trip and became paranoid. Within the confines of his brain, Gallagher decided that his smokin’ buddy, whose name has not been released, was a cop. …
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