Good day, sickos. I want to thank all of you for your calls and emails inquiring about my well-being and offering sex at various public parks. But fear not, I am just on a much-deserved, much-needed vacation. Although I am off this week, I will be writing up some stuff off and on while finally being able to focus on some DD house cleaning. I'll also have time to respond to some of you interested in writing. In the meantime, be sure to check out the forums for the latest in terrible news.

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Konrad Peters Accused Of Throwing Dildos At Young GirlsMom Gave Kid Away To Heroin User To Live Life Of Normal Teenager Man Arrested For Making Sweet, Sweet Love To Toy Horse At WalmartBoy, 9, Has Arm Ripped Off After Trying To Feed Bear At ZooJonnie Boggess Accused Of Having 'Gentle Sexual Intercourse' With PigletTeen With Pre-existing Health Issues Dies Inside Haunted House AttractionMan Goes To Hospital After Chewing On Rat's Head Found In Golden Corral ChiliGenoveva Nunez-Figueroa Charged After Getting Stuck In Chimney Of Man She Met OnlineBrittany Ruck Accused Of Separating Young Daughter's Scalp From Her Skull

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