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P. Simon JamrozikUpper Darby, PA — An Upper Darby man is behind bars for allegedly luring a 12-year-old boy into his home and tickling the child’s feet. Among other weird stuff…

According to police, the boy was walking home from school Monday, when the alleged tickler, 63-year-old P. “Pat” Simon Jamrozik, told the boy to go inside the home he shared with his sister.

Once inside the home, Jamrozik reportedly demanded the boy remove his socks and shoes and lay on the couch. He then sprayed the boy’s feet with some sort of anti-fungal crap and started in with the rubbin’ and the tickling. This, police say, was done as Jamrozik massaged his own package.

After he’d had his fill of that nasty business, Jamrozik directed the boy to lay down on the kitchen table and lift his shirt so he could perform an ear, nose and throat exam.

“He started feeling the boy’s back, chest and stomach with his hand and used a stethoscope to listen to his heart,” reported Police Superintendent Michael Chitwood. …

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