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Disney Cruise Line Worker Accused Of Molesting 13-Year-Old Passenger Amber Alert Issued For Teen After Alleged Kidnapper Calls To Taunt FamilyMostly Nekkid Lady Goes On Rampage Inside McD's; Breaks Stuff, Eats Ice CreamRapper Andre Johnson Cut Off His Penis Before Jumping From BuildingMegan Huntsman Accused Of Using Garage To Store Her Murdered BabiesWoman Finds Decomposing Homeless Man Under Deck During Easter Egg HuntTeen Gets Swatted After Beating Someone At Call Of DutyHolly Morrison Accused Of Allowing Boyfriend To Sexually Assault Child RelativePolice Officer's Son Charged With Stabbing Death Of Five Students At PartyDemetrio Campbell Accused Of Breaking Into Home, Raping 4-Year-Old Girl

Insane Cat Attacks Baby, Traps Family In BedroomPortland, OR — An evil feline with a history of violence now stands accused of attacking a 7-month-old child and forcing the child’s entire family, including their pussy dog, to hole up in a bedroom and call 911.

Lux, apparently unsatisfied with slowly sucking the child’s breath out of his body, reportedly attacked the child Sunday, scratching the kid on the face. This led to the child’s father putting a boot up the 22 pound pussy’s ass. Needless to say, that ass tap didn’t go over well.

The Himalayan flew into a rage, eventually chasing the family into a bedroom.

The cat’s owner informed the 911 dispatcher the cat “went over the edge,” and was charging at them every time they opened the door. The man also claimed the cat had a history of being an asshole — he was just a little more assholish on that particular day.

“He’s trying to attack us,” the man said as the cat screeched and hissed in the background. “He’s very, very, very, very hostile.”

After it was determined the child didn’t require medical assistance, the dispatcher dispatched officers to the couple’s home.…

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Teens Accused Of Torturing Classmate, Carving Swastika In His ForeheadPORTLAND, OR – Four teens are looking at some serious charges after being accused of kidnapping and torturing one of their classmates.

Police say during a snowstorm on February 10, Jenna Montgomery, 15, lured 16-year-old Dustin Murrain into a shed behind a house. Murrain told police he had met Montgomery earlier that day at David Douglas High School, where they both attended school.

According to Murrain’s account, once he walked into the shed he encountered three teen boys and realized he had fallen for one of the oldest tricks in the book.

First he was struck in the head with a crowbar before being ordered to take off his shirt. Then 15-year-old Blue Kalmbach allegedly shot Murrain in the chest, groin and index finger with a BB gun. Kalmbach then carved a swastika into Murrain’s forehead with a box-cutter and forced Murrain to eat cat shit.

After having his iPod stolen, Murrain escaped the shed and fled to a nearby auto service shop for help. Police were called and Murrain was taken to OHSU Hospital for treatment.…

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Home Invader Knocked Out After Hes Tossed Down Flight Of StairsPORTLAND, OR – A man armed with a shotgun got a bit more than he bargained for after he broke into an apartment during an attempt to rob the people inside.

After 38-year-old Joshua McCoy successfully broke down the front door of the residence, while wielding a pistol-grip shotgun , he demanded money from the residents.

But a quick thinking 20-year-old foiled McCoy’s robbery attempt after he grabbed the shotgun from McCoy and then pushed his ass down a flight of stairs. McCoy ended up hitting his head on the way down and was knocked unconscious.

The 20-year-old and his mother’s boyfriend called police and stood watch over McCoy until law enforcement arrived and took McCoy into custody. After a quick trip to the hospital, McCoy was taken to jail and charged with first-degree robbery, second-degree robbery and first-degree burglary.…

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Couple Arrested After Tipping Their Waitress With MethSeaside, OR – A couple of morons are facing charges after they allegedly tipped a waitress with an envelope filled with meth last week.

Ryan Bensen, 40, and Erica Manley, 37, were getting their drink on at the Twisted Fish in Seaside late Friday evening, and when it came time to make good on their bill, they apparently showed their waitress their appreciation by slipping her some go fast with the cash.

We seriously need an “Are you fucking stupid” tag here at the Demon.

After getting a good look at her “tip,” the waitress called police. Though the envelope has been sent to the lab to be analyzed, the responding officer pretty much knew what it was on sight. It’s Oregon, after all…

Benson and Manley were taken into custody at the scene. A quick search revealed more meth in Manley’s purse. After procuring a warrant to search the couple’s car, even more meth was discovered. And a search of the couple’s motel room revealed meth and the tools necessary to produce more meth.…

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Crazy Half Nekkid Lady Accused Of Beating Up Disabled VehicleCorvallis, OR — The not-so-hot mess to the left is 24-year-old Dawn Lohmann — she was arrested on numerous charges after allegedly going all neanderthal and beating the crap out of a disabled vehicle on I-5 Sunday, as the driver and passenger watched in horror.

The vehicle’s passengers, a 53 and 61-year-old woman, were out doing whatever it is women that age do on a Sunday morning, when their car ran out of gas on the highway. As the two woman dialed for help, Lohmann, barefoot, approached the car.

The two women wisely rolled up the windows and locked the doors. In response, Lohmann reportedly dropped her pants, exposing her lady bits to the women. And then it got weird…..

After dropping trou, Lohmann, barefoot and presumably pantless(?), took off across the highway.

She reappeared just moments later and jumped on the hood of the car. She then began jumping up and down, the women later told police. No word on whether any grunting, growling was involved. Also unknown, whether the words HULK or SMASH was used at any point.…

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Romanian Princess Accused Of Running Illegal Cockfighting Ring In OregonGRANTS PASS, OR – Federal law enforcement agents swooped in and busted a group of Oregonians Thursday, including a Romanian princess and her husband, for allegedly running a cockfighting ring. It isn’t every day you get to write up a story about a Romanian Princess and cockfighting unless you’re in porn, let me tell you.

Indictments unsealed in U.S. District Court in Portland charge Irina Walker, 60, and her husband, John Wesley Walker, 67, a former sheriff’s deputy, with hosting cockfights and illegal gambling at their ranch just outside Irrigon, in Morrow County. Prosecutors are seeking forfeiture of the couples’ ranch, which does business under the name Stokes Landing Sport Horses. Guess they got away with it for so long by not using the name Stokes Landing Sport Cocks.

The Walkers were scheduled to be arraigned in federal court in Portland Friday on charges of operating an illegal gambling business, along with four other people from Irrigon and Hermiston. According to court records, no lawyer was listed for either the Walkers or any of the other defendants. …

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Woman, 35, Accused Of Having Sexual Relationship With 11 Year Old BoySALEM, OR  - The Marion County Sheriff’s Office have charged 35-year-old Sarah Beth Hopkins with multiple counts of sex abuse and rape after they say she was having a sexual relationship with an 11-year-old boy.

She got busted after the boy’s mother became suspicious of her one-time neighbor’s close relationship with her son and confronted him about it. The boy ‘fessed up and told his mom that he’d been cleaning Hopkins’ mud flaps for the last eight months.

The boy’s mother confronted Hopkins with what her son had told her and Hopkins admitted that it was true. She said she’d been having sex with the boy since February; playing find-the-wet-spot with him in her apartment and in public places when they went on walks together.

When police interviewed Hopkins, she told them she never forced the boy for sex or gave him anything in return. Hopkins was arrested and charged with 20 counts of rape and sodomy. Her bail has been set at $1 million and she’ll be back in Aug.…

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Oregon Woman Wanted For Fatal DUI Crash Found In Canada 16 Years Later After Bragging In BarLINN COUNTY, OR – A woman wanted for a DUI related death in 1997 was found in Canada after she bragged about getting away with murder inside a bar.

Police said in 1997, a then 38-year-old Jean Keating was driving drunk when she sideswiped a car driven by 65-year-old Jewel Anderson, causing her cross the center median and collide with another vehicle. Anderson was pronounced dead at the scene. Keating, as is usually the case with drunks, was not hurt.

Keating was charged with manslaughter, DUII, reckless driving and recklessly endangering another person. But while awaiting trial in March 1998, Keating’s attorney informed authorities he was concerned his client had “flown the coop.”. The Linn County Circuit Court issued a bench warrant for Keating’s arrest and she hasn’t been heard from since. Well, until now.

In early 2013 a police officer in Manitoba, Canada had followed up on a tip about a woman telling people in a bar how she had gotten away with the deadly crash in the United States.…

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Man Tried Raping Wife In Front Of Kids Before Killing LambEAGLE POINT, OR – This happened earlier this month, but someone sent it to us and I couldn’t pass it up. Leland Kinkey has been accused of trying to rape his wife twice before killing a lamb with his bare hands.

Jackson County Sheriff deputies responding to a physical domestic dispute call arrived at a home to find 46-year-old Leland Kinkey running around his property naked and screaming. Kinkey allegedly told the deputies that he had killed a lamb by slamming it into a car, breaking its neck, because “he was trying to be a man.”

After detaining Kinkey, they got more details from witnesses at the scene. Deputies learned Kinkey had gotten angry an hour earlier earlier because of mechanical issues with a vehicle. Enraged, he went inside the home and tried to rape his wife. She was able to run out of the home, along with her two children, and jump into a van.

While trying to leave the property, Kinkey dragged her out of the van by her hair and began beating her.…

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Andrew Barnett Gets 5 More Years For Mailing Phony Anthrax, Throwing PoopSalem, OR – Andrew Barnett, 32, received an extra five years in prison for a string of evil shenanigans he’s perpetrated from behind bars.

U.S. District Judge Marco A. Hernandez, who sent Barnett back to the Oregon State Penitentiary with the extra time, feels Barnett  “…has significant personality issues that remain unresolved.” Assistant U.S. Attorney John N. Parmley, a prosecutor called in from San Diego after the previous prosecutor fell victim to Barnett’s mischief, said of Barnett “The longer he stays in a controlled environment, the safer society will be.”

So what kind of douche-devilry draws such dire damnation? What manner of malevolence manifests such maligning? Threatening letters, anthrax hoaxes and poop… not necessarily in that order. Oh, and there’s even a torrid love affair with a not-really-hot-white-supremacist-spree-killer in there for you women folk.

Barnett’s streak starts back in 2008. Barnett, already in jail, mailed threatening letters to Washington County Sheriff Rob Gordon and three of his deputies. In August 2011, Barnett was moved to Portland’s Justice Center Jail, where he allegedly hurled a mixture of urine and feces at the face of Multnomah County Sheriff’s Deputy Brett S.…

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Jared Walter (aka The TriMet Barber) Back In Jail, This Time For Splooging In A Womans HairMilwaukie, OR – Who says you can’t teach an old perv new tricks? Jared Walter, also known as the TriMet Barber, has found himself back in jail after being caught jacking off into a woman’s hair.

TriMet transit police arrested the 26-year-old Monday afternoon as he waited for a bus in downtown Portland. Earlier that day, a woman reported that Walter had shot his wad into a woman hair while inside a TriMet bus. Video from a surveillance camera inside the bus even caught him in the act.

Police believe Walter has done the same thing to at least two other women in the same way in the last three weeks. “At the time of those first two reports, the victims were unsure as to what had transpired, and the seriousness of the offense was not understood,” Sgt. Pete Simpson said in a news release.

Jared Walter was charged with third-degree sexual abuse, public indecency, harassment and interfering with public transportation. He is being held on $22,000 bail, but still faces an accusation of violating post-prison supervision in Clackamas County.…

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Hugo Avalos Chanon Died Inside Mechanical Meat BlenderClackamas, OR - Hugo Avalos-Chanon died a horrible death other day after the 41-=year-old cleaning contractor fell into a mechanical blender at a meat-processing plant.

Avalos-Chanon worked for DCS Sanitation Management Inc., which performs daily cleaning of equipment at Interstate Meat Distributors. Shortly before midnight Friday, emergency crews were called to the plant after Avalos-Chanon was found entangled in a mechanical blender that regulates the fat content of ground meat.

Another worker hit the emergency stop button, but it was way too late for Avalos Chanon. The poor guy was pronounced dead at the scene, but his body could not be removed from the machine until it was dismantled the following day.

Dr. Cliff Young, a deputy state medical examiner, said Avalos-Chanon died from “blunt-force injuries and chopping wounds.

Interstate Meat was cited in October after inspectors found machinery in the meat-grounding room were not properly locked down during cleaning, and could result in “unexpected start-up of the machine.”  But OSHA says it’s too early to tell if that’s connected to Avalos-Chanon’s death.…

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Shayla Shonneker, 9, Died After Joseph Wolters Shot Her In Head While Practicing With GunOREGON CITY, OR – Shayla Shonneker died after her mother’s live-in boyfriend, 32-year-old Joseph Wolters, accidentally shot her has he practiced holstering his loaded gun.

Oregon City police say 9-year-old Shayla Shonneker was playing in her backyard while Wolters was inside the home practicing with his firearm, having recently been hired as an armed security guard with an armored transport company.

As Wolters was holstering and un-holstering his loaded gun, it went off. Out of all the paths this bullet could have traversed, this one traveled through a wall of the home, and into Shonneker’s face 50 yards away.

A LifeFlight helicopter rushed Shonneker to Oregon Health & Science University Hospital, where she died. Wolters, a decorated Iraq War veteran, cooperated with police during an interview with detectives. No word on if he will be facing criminal charges.

Gladstone School District Superintendent Bob Stewart said the district has activated its crisis-response team and has established a safe room for both adults and students at John Wetten Elementary School, where Shayla had been a student since kindergarten.…

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Gerardo Chavarria Sentenced For Killing Toddler By Pounding Boys Head Into Floor After Spilling His BeerKeizer, OR - Gerardo Chavarria, 24, was sentenced to 25 years in prison after admitting he got angry with his girlfriend’s 4-year-old son for spilling his beer, and killed the boy by pounded his head into the floor.

In 2011, Chavarria took his girlfriend’s son, Sebastian Iturbetook, to the hospital claiming that he was watching the boy when Sebastian fell down the stairs leading to the basement. Sebastion was transferred to Oregon Health and Science University where he died of blunt force trauma to the head on Nov. 6, 2011.

A medical examination would later show that the boy’s injuries did not coincide with Chavarria’s explanation of events. Chavarria would change his story, saying he’d accidentally pushed the child with a child carrier, causing Sebastion to fall down the flight of stairs. This explanation still did not explain the boy’s injuries, and Chavarria was charged with murder.

Chavarria continued to proclaim his innocence, never admitting to willfully abusing the boy, or intentionally causing his death. But that changed on Tuesday, two weeks before he was to go to trial, when Chavarria waived his right to a trial and told the court what actually happened on the morning of Sebastion’s death.…

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Naked, Bloody Tweaker Accused Of Trashing The Rage SalonCorvallis, Oregon – The wide eyed beauty you see here is Miss Jelena Monique Taylor, 44. She likes to party Carrie style. She also apparently enjoys the recreational use of meth and getting her hair and nails did. Oh, and she enjoys getting naked.

Sadly, meth and time do not combine very well. You see, Jelena reportedl went to the salon “The Rage” extra early to make sure she got in. So early, in fact, she literally had to break in. As in the door. With a body part of hers, which made her bleed. But it seems that since meth gives those on it superpowers, Miss Jelena went all Hulk on equipment at the salon and smashed it while bleeding all over everything.

“There were broken vases, and a broken dryer. … The toilet, the shower, everything was covered in blood. It looked like a murder scene,” said salon owner Kayley Kampfer.

Oh, and she did all of this bare assed. I agree with the part where she thought: “fuck my pants” and dropped them.…

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Bungling Burglar Calls 911 After Locking Self Inside Dollar TreeNorth Bend, OR — According to North Bend Police, a 45-year-old woman (45? Really?) called 911 to report she was locked inside a Dollar Tree store.

The call came in just after 3:00 Tuesday morning, police say.

When officers arrived at the store located in the Pony Village Mall, they say they found Darlene Huntley, yes… 45, locked inside.

No word on how she entered the store or why she didn’t just break a damn window to get out.

After a thorough investigation, Huntley was arrested and charged with second degree burglary and second degree criminal trespass, among other charges.

Huntley was transported to the Coos County Jail. No information on the bond/bail amount.

Even worse, they brought the ban hammer down. Hard. Huntley has been banned from the Pony Village Mall for LIFE! *insert echo here*

This, of course, brings to mind another Dollar Tree story we covered.

Back in 2011, we featured Shane Chavis – a man accused of holing up in the bathroom of an Arizona Dollar Tree.…

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Gay Teen Clings To Life After Hanging Himself In School PlaygroundPortland, OR – A 15-year-old boy is still clinging to life after hanging himself from some playground equipment at Central Elementary School.

Last Saturday, Jadin Bell was found by a passerby after the teen had climbed on top of a play structure and hanged himself. The person who found Bell tried rescuing the teen who was taken to Doernbecher Children’s Hospital where he remains on life support.

Reports are that Bell is an openly gay student at LHS where he is also a cheerleader. Even though he has a supportive family and large network of friends, Bell has been the target of bullying, reportedly in person and online.

School administrators confirmed that Bell had recently spoken with a school counselor and that they were investigating “a name calling incident.” In light of Bell’s attempted suicide, they’e also concerned about the other teen who was involved. Friends say that Bell had complained about bullying before, but that they have a hard time believing that this is what lead to Bell trying to take his own life.…

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Man Arrested After Punching Dog, Sticking It In Hot OvenLyons, OR — Does this guy look like the kind of douche that would punch a tiny dog in the face and toss it in the oven? Apparently.

Police in Lyons arrested 20-year-old Kevin Parrish earlier this week after doing just that.

Parrish was watching the 9-pound Chihuahua-Pinscher mix for his grandmother, who was out of state.

Parrish told police he had just heated up the oven to 350 and was preparing to make enchiladas, when the dog, Kudo, nipped at him.

Enraged, Parrish started punching the pint-sized pooch in the head and may even have strangled him a little.

Parrish then tossed the dog in the heated oven, police say, and was prepared to roast the little beast when he heard his brother enter the home.

Parrish’s brother and father rescued Kudo and rushed him to the vet, where was treated for cuts and bruises. He also had some singed fur, but is expected to fully recover.

Parrish’s father was the one to phone police, and is now caring for Kudo.…

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Man Accused Of Choking Girlfriend With His DreadlocksPortland, OR — There is certainly no shortage of domestic assault stories here at the Dreamin’ Demon, and while domestic violence is no laughing matter, the “weapons” some of the alleged abusers use make me giggle. A little.

Caleb “Damn, he’d be really fucking hot if he lost some of that excess hair” Grotberg, 32, was recently booked on a laundry list of charges after allegedly strangling his girlfriend with his dreadlocks.

Police were called to the couple’s home early Monday morning, where they learned from the girlfriend that Grotberg had assaulted her and attempted to strangle her with his hair after the two argued.

Grotberg was not at the scene when officers arrived, but was quickly picked up after the victim described his ‘do.

He’s now behind bars, facing domestic violence-related charges that include kidnapping, attempted assault, assault, menacing and strangulation.

The woman was taken to a Portland hospital for treatment to numerous injuries, none of which were considered life-threatening.

Speaking of weird-ass things people use to abuse their significant other – just to name a few – we have a change jar, a pet python, prosthetic leg, key lime pie, and my favorite….…

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Woman Charged With Attempted Murder After Running Down Husband With Ford F 150Salem, OR – A 47-year-old woman in Oregon has been charged with attempted murder after she used her Ford F-150 to run down her husband.

Shirley Nunez suspected that her husband, Kenneth, was having an affair with a woman who lived nearby. So on Monday night, Shirley broke into the home of her husband’s alleged mistress and confronted the woman, pointing a gun at her in the process.

No details on what was discussed, but Shirley did not physically injure the woman and left the residence in her 2003 Ford F-150. Kenneth was not nearly as lucky. When Shirley got back home, she saw her husband walking to his motorcycle parked in front of their house and decided to give him a kiss with her truck’s grill.

Bill Deconcini said he and his wife woke up after hearing screaming and the two came outside to find Kenneth unconscious in the grass after Shirley had ran him down with her truck. He was transported to Salem Hospital in critical condition while Shirley was taken to the hospital for a medical evaluation before being booked into the Marion County Jail.…

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