Miller County, MO – Meet Aaron Fisher, admitted baby raper. All hot and bothered after watching a porno last Wednesday, this monster decided to work out his sexual frustration on his 5-month-old baby girl. That baby girl is now listed in critical condition at the hospital, suffering from internal bleeding, a fractured skull, and several broken bones. According to court documents, the child showed signs of both physical and sexual abuse. He not only raped the child, he beat the shit out of her. In a statement given to the Miller County Sheriff’s Department on Oct. 29, Aaron described, in detail, exactly what he had done to the child. This guy needs to be lobotomized with a rusty spoon – asap. It is reported that Aaron, along with the mother of the infant and a 2-year-old child, were living in his mother’s home. His mother, however, recently fled the home and the state after Aaron allegedly assaulted her. OMFG. Why is this deranged pile of human excrement still breathing? Aaron Michael Fisher, 21, is being held without bond on two counts of sodomy. The infant and her 2-year-old sibling have been placed in protective custody while the investigation continues. [Read more...]

ST. MARTINS, Missouri – Here we go, another little girl has vanished while walking home. Maybe this will end differently than the Somer Thompson disappearance. At 6:15 p.m. Wednesday, 9-year-old Elizabeth Olten was walking the quarter mile home from a friend’s house in the 600 block of Route D south of St. Martins. She never arrived at her home. The Cole County Sheriff’s Department has issued an Endangered Person Advisory. Olten is a white, 9-year-old female. She is 5′ 2″ and 108 lbs. with brown hair, brown eyes and a fair complexion with physical marks. She was last seen wearing a pink scarf, pink shirt and pink sweater and blue jeans with white sneakers. She was also carrying a cell phone. The sheriff’s department contacted the cell phone provider, AT&T, who “pinged” the cell phone to triangulate its location. AT&T put the cell phone’s location deep in the woods near Elizabeth’sElizabeth reviews home. The girl’s family members said she is afraid of the woods and the dark. [Read more...]

Arnold, MO – Just the other day, my 14-year-old daughter and I were talking about boys. While we don’t see eye-to-eye on many aspects of that particular subject, we do agree on one thing – teenage boys are annoying, gross, and they smell funny. (I was trying to get the point across that many boys never get past that stinky gross phase). Why on earth would any grown woman want anything to do with a smelly adolescent that they didn’t have to be around? What is it about teenage boys that some women find so damn attractive? I just don’t get it. Take Christie Bradley, for instance. Her lovely mug is gracing the front page of the Dreamin’ Demon because she wanted to get a little sumpin’ sumpin’ from a 13-year-old boy. While some boys would jump at the chance to bed an older woman, the boy in this instance wasn’t feeling quite so froggy. [Read more...]

Imperial, MO - James Looney used to be a grouchy old fart. Neighbors said the 40-year-old man always kept to himself and, at times, would scream at kids for daring to step on his lawn. All of that changed when he met his girlfriend, Kim Thompson, about a month ago. He moved her into his home and agreed to raise her 2-week-old son as his own. Shortly after setting up house together, Looney accepted a job as an over the road trucker – a job that would keep him away from his new family two to three nights a week. Concerned about his ready-made family’s safety while he was out on the road, Looney decided to school Kim on the importance of gun safety. Now, I couldn’t tell you much about guns and safety and all that happy crap – I’m more of a Louisville Slugger type of gal. But, right off the top of my head, I can name three rules of gun safety. #1. Always assume a gun is loaded. #2. If you’re gonna point the damn thing, your intent better be to injure or kill your target. #3. Guns, stupidity, and alcohol don’t fucking mix. A combination of the three can be lethal. I wish I could tell you that Looney practiced what he preached and adhered to those three very important rules, taught his girlfriend well, and the two donned superhero capes and saved all of mankind with their trigger fingers. I also wish I could tell you I won the fucking lottery. [Read more...]

St. Charles, Missouri - Evan Hassan Wormley, aka EV THA TV, had a bad morning yesterday.   So did his two-year-old son, Ev Junior.  So did Random Casino Bystander Guy, who was just trying to scratch a gambling itch at a St. Louis-area casino.  At 4:30 a.m. Tuesday, aspiring hip-hop artist Wormley, 21, showed up at the Ameristar casino in St. Charles.  That’s not weird, right?  People gamble at all hours.  But Ev was (a) drunk, and (b) had his kid with him, and the baby was wearing nothing but a dirty diaper.  That probably should have been Sign #1 that things weren’t going to go well for either Evan.  [Read more...]

Cape Girardeau, Missouri is a town of a little over 37,000 stretched along the banks of the muddy Mississippi River. One would think, with the town’s dynamics:  for 100 women there are 86.9 males, men really wouldn’t have to fight for females! I mean seriously…unless there is an abundance of ugly ones out there. And what is with the 86.9 figure? I’ve never quite understood how they arrive at that, until now. I suppose, when someone looses a body part, that’s taken into account? And if that’s so, the ratio should now reflect something like 100 : 86.8  after some poor dude lost his ear lobe due to a little jealousy! [Read more...]

Joplin, Missouri – Drinking is such a social event in almost every culture. Fridays after work, a group of employees will often meet up at a local bar and have a few cocktails to celebrate making it through yet another week without killing each other, their boss, or the one person they can’t stand in the office. CollegeCollege reviews weekends were spent in Fraternity/Sorority Houses drinking with classmates and having a fine time. It was the college influence that introduced drinking games into the homes of thousands of people. Back in my day, “Bob” was sure to get you drunk off your ass in just a thirty minute span of time while watching the “Bob Newhart Show” (every time “Bob” was said, every one would drink) Quarters was another drinking game that was used to entertain AND intoxicate. Even though there is widespread participation of underage individuals playing these games, I don’t ever recall playing with an 11 year-old and certainly not to the point of him dying. [Read more...]

St. John, MO – If ever there were a perfect tool for parenting, it’s the pacifier. On one hand, I can’t tell you how many hours of much needed sleep I can attribute to the beloved binky…with a couple of my own children, and later, my grandson. On the other hand, binkies can be a real pain in the ass – especially if the kid really doesn’t want to be corked. My son, who never was a fan of the pacifier, was a world class binky spitter…he could pop that thing out of his mouth and across the room in the blink of an eye, without a break in the screaming. I did what many parents do, let him scream until he wore himself out or walk the floor with him until he fell asleep. It never crossed my mind to tie a blanket around his little face to keep that cork in his mouth. Authorities believe that is exactly what Stacey Johnson did to her 2-month-old son, Tyler. [Read more...]

Lake Ozark, MO- Spousal abuse is never funny. When I hear stories like this one, the first thing that comes to mind is how much I’d like to rip the perp a new one. Then I have to sit back and calmly sip the coffee SoJaded pours while I watch thinkgoat poke her finger in each doughnut to find the freshest one, and try to come up with an interesting twist to the article. It gets difficult sometimes, especially with a dictator like Morbid, who refuses to unlock our staff room door until everyone in his harem has produced something of quality that will entice your senses and get you to leave a comment or two. The power he has over us is strange, and may need to be investigated, but I will say that if you saw us foxy bitches in real life, you would consider him to be one helluva lucky bastard. So, here is the story. Let’s hope he lets me out of this crazy room before Unamused and RottenApple get bored and start photocopying their nether regions on the copier again. [Read more...]

Carter County, MO - This here’s a story about love, betrayal, and bloodshed. The setting is Carter County, Missouri nestled in the Ozark foothills in the Southeastern part of the state. Census reports state a little over half of the residents there have at least graduated from High School. I’ve been through that area, it’s beautiful – “God’s” country.  And the one thing that’s generally coupled with unspoiled land is unrefined inhabitants. By “unrefined” I mean hillbillies. The movie DeliveranceDeliverance reviews could very well have been filmed in Carter County had Georgia been struck with some sort of plague. [Read more...]

Oakville, Missouri–I don’t know much about Arlee Hayes, but I know one thing for certain…he is one cold-hearted piece of shit. After killing his girlfriend’s 22-month-old daughter, Sophia “Baby” Sanchez, he managed to strap the dead child into her car seat, take the dead child along for the ride to pick up her mother from work, return home and put the dead child to bed…all while acting as if everything was just fine and dandy. [Read more...]

Clayton, MO-Seems like we’ve had quite a few vile and sneaky cockroaches playing boogieman this month. They silently creep into homes in the middle of the night to prey on innocent children and, sometimes, they succeed.  William J. McLaughlin, 34, is another one of those wretched insects that needs to be squashed from our misery. [Read more...]

William Marks

Fulton, Missouri–Foreplay can be a little tricky–different women have different desires and needs. Meaningful conversation, kissing, snuggling, gentle caressing, automobiles, and jewelry? That’s doing it right. Knives, threats of bodily harm to offspring, and attempted rape? That’s doing it wrong.

[Read more...]

Robert Michael Black

Liberty, Missouri–Robert Michael Black, 40, is a pastor at the New Home Baptist Church in St. Joesph, MO. His parishioners have nothing but good things to say about him; ‘He’s a good man.’ ‘He’s a good friend.’ ‘He has a wife and three children.’ You know, the usual spiel. Police say he has a darker side, a pervy side, if you will. Robert Black was just stung in an internet sex sting. [Read more...]