WALDORF, MD – A 5-year-old girl is recovering from some horrendous injuries she received after being attacked by two dogs in her backyard.
Police said the 5-year-old was at the home with her mother’s boyfriend when she wandered into the backyard where three dogs, an English bulldog and two Presa Canarios, were being kept in a kennel. The dog’s were not owned by the family, according to reports.
“We’re hearing that the dogs may have just been dropped off at the house to be watched after by the homeowners, so we’re still trying to verify that,” said Diane Richardson of the Charles County Sheriff’s Office.
It’s not clear how or why two of the dogs were not in their kennel, but the English Bulldog and one of the Pres Canarios viciously attacked the girl for reasons unknown.
“It’s not clear if she let the dogs out of the kennel,” says Diane Richardson, spokesperson for the Charles County Sheriff’s Department. “It’s not clear if they were even in the kennel… at this point there are no obvious signs of neglect or anything like that.”
When the boyfriend found Savanna, she was in the fetal position, unconscious, with the two dogs near her body.…Continue Reading
Here, Now – Thanks everyone who stopped by and chatted while we conducted another Pulpit of Doom podcast last night. I unintentionally got drunk before we went on, and got increasingly drunker as the show progressed. I was feeling pre-tay good.
As usual, we discussed the top 10 stories circulating on the site for the last week, including attack of the baby mamas, selling your kids for fun and profit, April Fool’s pranks and the psycho girlfriends who play them, murder- suicide on the green, getting slap-happy with other people’s kids, evil pit bulls and the babies they eat, and the dangers of muddin’ while drunk. We also talked about corporal punishment, and the racist comments that show up on the site (and why some are allowed).
After we went off the air, Athena and myself talked a bit about firearms, and how much fun they are to shoot. We also answer a caller who had listened to the entire show via their phone, and let her express her fanatical adoration for me and my writing.…Continue Reading
Daly City, CA – Back in 2011, we reported on 39-year-old Jesusa Tatad, the woman who poured boiling water on her sleeping ex-husband and then whacked him with a baseball bat. On Wednesday, Tatad pleaded guilty to second-degree murder after the man died from his injuries.
Tatad and her ex-husband, 36-year-old Ronnie Tatad, were still living together in 2011 after their divorce three years prior. Tatad said Ronnie had promised to re-marry her and bring their two daughters, aged 9 and 14, back from the Philippines to live with them.
But the years passed and Ronnie never re-married her and he never brought their children home. To add insult to injury, Ronnie had gotten himself a girlfriend. In retaliation, Tatad waited for Ronnie to fall asleep, then dumped a pot of boiling water on him. When Ronnie jumped up and ran to the bathroom, Tatad whacked him in the head with a baseball bat.
Ronnie ran from the apartment half-naked, and was found hiding behind a car by a maintenance worker who called 911.…Continue Reading
Sante Fe, NM – Back in February, we reported on 27-year-old Daniel Anaya, the Dillard’s shoe salesman accused of attacking his ex-girlfriend and trying to chew off her big toe. He’s now been arrested again, charged with doing the exact same thing.
Anaya first made the news after he broke into his ex girlfriend’s apartment, held her down and proceeded to take bites out of her toenail and toe flesh with “a blank look on his face.” Anaya was facing charges of burglary, false imprisonment, interference with communications and aggravated battery against a household member.
That case was was dismissed because a witness or prosecutor didn’t show up to court. I’m going to go out on a limb and bet that the ex-girlfriend didn’t show up, and that she is now regretting that decision.
After filing a restraining order against Anaya, the victim moved from Santa Fe to Albuquerque. This did little to deter Anaya, who tracked her down and walked into the woman’s residence on April 1st. His ex informed him that he he needed to get out and that he was violating a restraining order.…Continue Reading
St-Louis, MO - Police say 2-year-old Mason Gorse died on Monday after he got caught in the cord of window blinds in his bedroom.
Apparently, Gorse was in his bedroom when he climbed on to his window sill and got caught in the nylon cord of the blinds. His mother found him hanging from his neck, several feet off the ground. A family member performed CPR on Gorse until paramedics arrived, but the boy was pronounced dead at Cardinal Glennon Children’s Medical Center.
Homicide detectives investigated, but said the death appears to be a tragic accident.
For any of you not aware, the American Academy of Pediatrics says that since 1991, more than 175 infants and children have died after accidentally strangling in window blind cords. According to Parents for Window Blind Safety, 546 children have been strangled by window blind cords since 1983.
Look, I was far from the perfect parent, and I seriously doubt you could completely prep your home to the point that a 2-year-old couldn’t find some way to accidentally kill themselves.…Continue Reading
BATAVIA, IA – Two children were killed on Monday after their mother, Tara Lewman, drove her minivan around lowered track arms and was struck by a train.
Verdae Blom, who works for Vision Ag, which is located by the tracks where the accident occurred, said he heard a loud noise around 4 p.m. Monday, and then saw a large plume of dust.
“It was a mess,” said Blom, describing the aftermath as being like nothing he’d ever seen before. When he went to the crossing to get a better look, he saw that two young children had been
thrown from a Dodge Caravan, which landed nose-down in a ditch.
“It was a tangled-up mess,” said Blom. “The whole back of it, on the passenger side from the front seat, the whole thing was wiped out. It was terrible.”
According to Iowa State Patrol’s initial crash report, Tara Lewman, the childrens’ mother, allegedly drove around a lowered railroad crossing gate at around 4 p.m. when her vehicle was hit by a westbound Burlington Northern Santa Fe freight train.…Continue Reading
Sacramento, CA - Craig Fugate, a 30-year-old graffiti artist, accidentally asphyxiated himself while allegedly attempting to graffiti a Sacramento high-rise.
Apparently, Fugate entered the 1201 K Tower on Sunday, got onto the roof, and then used rope left by window washers to crudely fashion a harness to lower himself off a 17th floor landing on the east side of the office building. The rope ended up looped around his chest and legs, squeezing him into a fetal position as the rope cinched around him.
Police and fire responded to a call for help at 7:44 am Monday morning, when Fugate’s body was discovered dangling from the building. Emergency crews rappelled down the building and confirmed Fugate was dead and, since is body wasn’t retrieved until around 9 am, a lot of people got to see a dead body hanging 160 feet in the air. Markers, glass etching tools, spray paint and a stencil were also found at the scene.
Fugate’s uncle, Joseph Fugate, stated, “I have never known for him to do that before. He is an artist. I know that.” Craig Fugate had been living in Vancouver, WA and had told his uncle he was planning on moving to Sacramento.…Continue Reading
HUDSON, WI – Last week, Aaron Schaffhausen admitted that on July 10, 2012, he slit the throats of his three daughters, 11-year-old Amara, 8-year-old Sophie and 5-year-old Cecilia.
He is currently on trial as his attorneys try to convince a jury that he was insane at the time of the murders and not just a vindictive asshole out to hurt his ex-wife in the worst way possible.
Aaron and Jessica Schaffhausen were divorced in January 2012. Aaron relocated to North Dakota, but on the morning of the murders, Aaron texted Jessica asking if he could see his daughters. Jessica agreed, but told him she wanted him gone before she arrived home from work.
Within two hours of arriving at the home and greeting his daughters, he had slit their throats and placed each of them in their beds. He then called his ex-wife at work and informed her he’d just killed their daughters before walking into a police station covered in blood. The recording of Jessica’s 911 call was played in court.…Continue Reading
According to the police report, one woman pushed a child aside so her own child could get their hands on one of Lucifer’s brightly colored testicles. The mother of the child who was cast aside confronted the other mom and the two began fighting.
Other people at the egg hunt had to separate the women three or four times before they finally disengaged. By time police arrived on the scene, only one mother was there. She was sporting a bloody nose, but refused to press charges against her attacker.
I’m tempted to contact the police officer who responded to the scene and see if he’d like to write for the site. Officer Jonah Spangenthal-Lee used four terrible, egg- related puns inside the following report:
“Police were called to the Woodland Park Zoo on Sunday after an Easter egg hunt turned rotten (groan).
The hard-boiled tale began around 1 pm, when one woman reportedly pushed a child aside as her own child was scrambling toward some brightly colored eggs.
The shoving sparked a confrontation between the first woman (the supposed shover) and the second child’s mother, who began fighting and had to be separated three or four times.…Continue Reading
Wagoner County, OK – Police have arrested 18-year-old Tori Wheeler after they say she played an April Fool’s prank on her boyfriend before cutting his throat.
On April 1st, Wheeler decided to play a prank on her boyfriend, Derek Bauer, by telling him she was pregnant. Bauer did not take the news very well and became agitated at the thought of fathering a child with Wheeler.
Wheeler then became angry at her boyfriend’s negative response and responded by pulling out a knife and threatening Bauer with it. Wheeler later told police that the “threatening upset boyfriend with a knife” was also part of her hilarious April Fool’s prank
Bauer didn’t find any of this funny at all and threatened to call police on Wheeler. That’s when Wheeler lost her goddamn marbles and attacked Bauer, cutting his throat with the knife and biting him twice.
After calling police to report Wheeler, Bauer was taken to the hospital for non-life-threatening injuries and later released. For her prank, Tori Wheeler was taken to jail on a charge of assault with a deadly weapon.…Continue Reading
EGG HARBOR TWP., NJ – Police in New Jersey have accused Amy Ochetto of intentionally setting her home on fire while her 12-year-old daughter was still inside.
Sometime around 12:24 a.m. Tuesday, police and fire crews responded to a house fire call on Windwood Drive in the Cardiff section of the township. They would find Ochetto’s home on fire and helped get the woman’s daughter out of the home without injury, along with 41-year-old Yeser Bekete.
The Cardiff and Bargaintown fire companies were able to extinguish the blaze and later determined that the fire had been intentionally set. Detectives got involved and would accuse Amy Ochetto of using a flammable liquid to intentionally set the fire while her daughter and Bekete were still inside the house.
Ochetto was arrested and charged with aggravated arson, two counts of aggravated assault, and endangering the welfare of a child. She is being held on $100,000 cash bail. Police have not revealed why they believe Ochetto set fire to the house.
Some have wondered why Ochetto was not charged with attempted murder if she set the fire knowing there were occupants in the house.…Continue Reading
PALM BAY, FL – Police say a homeless woman was arrested and has been charged with burglary and criminal mischief after she was found in a Palm Bay homeowner’s pool, using it to take a bath.
According to a police report, officers were called to a home on the 1300 block of Knecht Road after the homeowner said he saw a strange woman enter his back yard. The man said he used his surveillance system to see what the woman was doing when she walked behind his house and promptly dropped a deuce on his lawn.
The sea-nymph, later identified as 35-year-old Cheryl Beauchamp, wasn’t finished. Unable to enter the pool area, she used a rock to cut the screen to gain access, stripped naked, and sans Calgon, hopped in for a little rub-a-dub-dub. No word in the report whether or not she wiped, first.
When police confronted Beauchamp, she told them she wanted to take a bath, and broke the screen because the door was locked. She also told them that she was on her way to Washington, D.C., where she was headed so she could yell at President Obama.…Continue Reading
ST. PAUL, MN — Autopsy results reveal 35-year-old Stephanie Shields drowned her two children, 7-year-old Nolan and 6-year-old Josephine, before killing herself.
A family member called 911 on Easter morning to report they had found Shields and her two children dead inside their home.
Shields’s husband, National Guard member Sergeant 1st Class Mark Shields, is the father of both kids and had just recently moved out of the home.
Both children attended Zimmerman Elementary School where Principal Susan Johnston said “Josephine Shields and her brother Nolan were part of our Zimmerman Elementary School family and we are deeply saddened.”
I know there is a likelihood that Shield suffers from some kind of mental illness, as normal people just do not up and drown their kids. But whenever I hear about cases like this, I’ve always felt it was an act of vindictive spite, not an act derived from a mental breakdown.
Admittedly, my opinion is based off of ignorance as I know absolutely nothing about this woman aside from her recent actions. For all we know, she may have displayed signs of mental illness all her life.…Continue Reading
HARRISBURG, NC - On Friday, Anthony Hardy shot and killed his neighbors on either side of his home before killing himself after a police standoff.
Police say they received a 911 call from the wife of 42-year-old Daniel Thomas Kirchner, who I was informed I may have went to high school with, stating Hardy was shooting at her husband in the backyard.
“He came into my backyard and started shooting at my husband and my other neighbor,” she tells the 911 operator.
When asked what prompted the shooting, she says she does not know. She says her husband was outside working in the backyard when Hardy walked over and started shooting, hitting both her husband and another neighbor, 64-year-old Gary Wade Stocks.
When she realizes Hardy has left, she tried to perform CPR on her husband, noticing he had been shot in the stomach, but it is too late. Both he and Stocks were pronounced dead at the scene.
When police arrived, they found Hardy was back inside his home and refused to come out, leading to a police standoff in which gunfire was reportedly exchanged. When Cabarrus County SWAT team members finally made entry into Hardy’s home hours later, they found him dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.…Continue Reading
Australia - A woman in Australia was arrested after she poured super glue into a man’s eyes during an argument.
Police say the 58-year-old woman got into an argument with her 64-year-old roommate on Easter Sunday that turned particularly violent.
Senior Sergeant Paul Kinna said the woman allegedly tried to strangle the man and poured superglue into his eyes and one ear, then tried to set the man on fire before beating him with her prosthetic leg. Aristocrats!
The man was taken to Ballarat Base Hospital, before being transferred to Melbourne’s Eye and Ear Hospital in a stable condition. The woman has been charged with three offenses, including one count of reckless conduct endangering life.
The man got lucky as getting super glur into your eyes isn’t really as bad as it sounds. I mean, it sucks, but that was actually the one thing she did to him that wouldn’t have caused any serious injury.Continue Reading
HOUSTON, TX – A fight between baby mamas ended with one woman having her leg amputated after one of the women intentionally rammed the other with a car and pinned her to a house.
According to Chris Chaney, 26-year-old Shareyll Starre Hunter is his ex and the mother of two of his children and pregnant with another. He says she took his car keys from his home without his permission, angering his current girlfriend, 21-year-old Alise Stephon Kelley, who is four months pregnant with his child.
The two women got into an altercation in the driveway, with one of the women trying to hit the other with a flashlight. When Kelley started walking back towards the house, Hunter drove the vehicle into her, pinning Kelley to the house before driving off.
Police say Kelley was transported to Memorial Hermann Hospital and suffered several compound fractures in at least one leg, which doctors later amputated. At this time, police are still looking for Hunter, who already has an outstanding warrant, and was last seen driving Chaney’s beige Lincoln LS with paper plates.…Continue Reading
KINGSPORT, TN - Earlier this month we had a story about a mother trying to sell her kids to get her boyfriend out of jail. Now we have a story about Shawn Hughes, a 32-year-old man from Tennessee who tried selling his kid to get his girlfriend out of jail.
Last Thursday, the grandmother of 27-year-old Jessica Carey called police to report that her granddaughter had abandoned her two children at her home and she’d been caring for them for almost a week. Carey was located and arrested on an outstanding warrant for aggravated child abuse and neglect.
Her boyfriend, Shawn Hughes, was arrested an hour later on a DUI charge. After bonding out on Monday, Hughes went to his girlfriend’s grandmother and asked the 75-year-old woman for $2,000 so he could bail Carey out of jail. She refused to give him the money and Hughes never made any attempt to retrieve the couple’s children.
He returned the next day begging for $300 in bail money, which the woman gave him.…Continue Reading
SPARTANBURG, SC - Police say 36-year-old Tyshekka Collier is facing charges after she walked into the school office to pick up her son, who had just been suspended, then slapped the wrong child.
On Wednesday morning, Collier was called to Fairforest Middle School to get her son because he’d just been suspended. When she arrived, she saw a boy sitting in the office with his head down and slapped him in the face. Problem was that it wasn’t her son – it was a boy who was sick and waiting for his mother to come pick him up.
Collier apologized to the boy, then walked over to her son and proceeded to slap his ass silly. According to the arrest warrant, Collier hit her son in the head and face, knocking him to the ground.
Police were called to the scene and Collier was arrested and charged with disturbing school and two counts of assault and battery.
“In speaking with the parents and all the interviews that were done — the two charges for the assaults and disturbing school, we felt were the most appropriate means to go with,” said Spartanburg County sheriff’s Lt.…Continue Reading
Here, Now – I would like to thank everyone who turned out to last night’s Pulpit of Doom Podcast with me and Athena. I can’t speak for Athena, but for once, I was completely sober. It turned out pretty good and I think my “uhs” and “ums” were at a bare minimum as I didn’t catch any shit from PaganOne about it yet.
As usual, we talked about the top 10 stories circulating on the site for the last week, including women killing children, the Backpage Cock Gobbler, child neglect, minors and the old cheerleaders who love them, beating kids until they pass out, and starving toddlers living with a corpse. But the majority of the time was spent talking about teenage suicide – where I went on my usual rant on why it’s retarded that personal finance and mental health are not required courses in our children’s schools – and pit bulls eating children.
The latter of which I explain my stance on the breed – especially since I get accused of hating them so much.…Continue Reading
Tallahasee, FL – Police say 22-year-old Jenna Porter scored a hole in two at the Hilaman Golf Course after using a handgun to kill her 3-year-old daughter then herself.
Golfers playing at the public golf course heard two gunshots around 5pm Tuesday and went to investigate. That’s when they found Porter and her daughter, 3-year-old Scarlett Porter, dead in a grassy area between the golf course and the apartment complex where the two lived.
The golfers called 911 and stayed with the bodies until police arrived on the scene. Police say a handgun was found at the scene and that Porter shot her daughter once in the head before turning the gun on herself.
“This is a terrible, tragic set of circumstances,” Leon County Sheriff’s Office Spokesman Lt. James McQuaig said. “Our thoughts and prayers go out to those left behind because of this tragic set of circumstances.”
One neighbor was shocked at Porter’s actions, stating that she and her daughter “seemed like normal people.”
“It made me feel sad because she is lying on the ground and there’s nothing she could do for herself … and that’s kind of shocking,” said one witness who lived at the apartments.…Continue Reading