Vancouver, BC - Police called to a Vancouver car wash after reports of screams discovered the source to be three men who had run themselves through the car wash while naked in a shopping cart.
Abbotsford police – called to the car wash at around midnight by concerned neighbors – arrived to find the three reportedly ‘sore’ 20-year-olds putting their clothes back on.
“They decided it would be a really good idea to strip down and run themselves [in] the cart through the car wash. Need I say they were intoxicated?” said Constable Ian MacDonald.
The police report noted that the men made the mistake of selecting either the “typhoon” or “super typhoon” mode. Let’s all take a moment to thank the good Lord that the car wash didn’t have the dreaded “hyper-mega typhoon” setting – which is believed to have been outlawed in most Canadian provinces.
After reportedly making sure the men were not injured and after listening to their apologies for what they recognized as a ‘poor life choice,’ police sent the three men home to sleep it off.…
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Orlando, Fla - Security cameras caught a strange case of child abuse in a car wash bay at the Magical Car Wash in Orlando. They show a woman spraying a toddler with a high pressure hose while another woman watches. The footage shows the toddler attempt to run away, but she is grabbed and pinned to the wall as she is prayed on the legs, back and even her face. The manager of the car wash didn’t see the abuse until she watched the footage, but she did hear the little girl crying after the incident. She als heard the woman state, “You’re going to learn to respect me. You don’t treat me bad. You don’t mistreat me; I’m your mother.” Footage also shows the girl being stripped naked, while the two women grabbed a towel and put her back in the car. Once investigators locate the women, they said the mother will likely face child abuse charges.…
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Wyoming, Mich. — A Goo Goo Car Wash employee was killed when he got entangled in the giant, automatic brushes. Ricardo Alberto Martinez, 18, was closing the car wash Friday night when a customer returned to have his vehicle washed again. After the vehicle entered the car wash, Martinez went inside and somehow became entangled, police said.
“Looks like a hose or something got caught up in some of the bigger equipment around his feet and just pulled him in,” says Lieutenant Scott Gardner of the Wyoming Police Department.
Another customer later found the body at the business in this western Michigan community located near Grand Rapids, police said
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Lincolnton, NC – Jolynn Banner, 59, was attempting to put in a car wash code at the Petro Express car wash on 2230 E. Main St. Instead of rolling her window down to type in the code, she decided to open her Pontiac Firebird’s door and stand inside to reach the pad. Being that this story is on my site, you can almost write the rest of this article yourself. But I’ll go ahead and tell you what happened next.
Mrs Banner’s foot slipped off of the brake causing the car rolled forward with her head sticking out. The car struck the brick wall of the car wash, pinning Banner between her car door and her car’s frame.
She received “crushing injuries to the neck,” and died at the scene, EMS records say.
How this woman lived to the age of 59 is anyones guess.
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