Every month, Amazon highlights some books that their editors feel are the best new reads in fiction and nonfiction, making them available at a discount all month long. So we have decided that every month we will take a look at this list and put it through the D’D filter, taking out any crap that may have terms like “young adult”, “heartwarming” and “inspiring” attached to them – leaving a much better list of the dark, morbid and macabre. I won’t sit here and pretend to care if some of you open-mouth breathers pry your eyes off of Maury long enough to crack a book, as I don’t care if you stay dumb. I NEED some of you to serve me my $5 Box at Taco Bell and to wash my car. This monthly section is more for fans of D’D who also like to read a good book on occasion. So for you, feel free to jump into the discussion with your observations or chime in if you have already read any of the books we feature. Read on for our filtered list of Amazon’s Best Books for MarchMarch reviews 2010. [Read more...]

Middleton, Wisconsin – I can see it now:  You are 6-years-old and Daddy got drunk again and beat mom to a bloody pulp. Blue and RedRed reviews lights are flashing through the windows, and cops are swarming throughout the house. Mommy is being carted away on a stretcher as she chokes on her own teeth, her face swollen beyond recognition while Daddy, who was Tazed in the kitchen earlier, is currently hogtied and screaming in the back of a patrol car. It’s at this point you are approached by an officer who is handing you something. “It’s gonna be ok sweetie,” he says, “cuddle with this copy of Green Eggs and Ham.” [Read more...]

Melody Grace McCartney does not know who she is. Well, to be more precise: she does not know who she would have been. When Melody was six, she and her parents witnessed something they shouldn’t have. An act of mafioso brutality. Talked into testifying, her parents went into the Witness Protection Program, taking Melody with them. And ruining any chance she had of living a normal life. Also gone is any possibility of an extraordinary existence. The assassination of her parents underscores a threat so severe that Melody must not stand out. Unable to attach to others, to excel in any way, or even to enjoy the banal existences lamented by her peers, Melody finds herself writhing in an unnatural state of forced mediocrity. [Read more...]

Codename: Red Ops.
Objective: Isolate. Terrorize. Annihilate.
Santiago: Manipulates organs and other body parts to inflict maximum pain and terror.
AjaxAjax reviews: A giant at over 7-feet tall. He just likes to hurt for the sake of causing pain.
Taylor: He’s a biter.
Bernie: Loves to play with fire.

Who are they? A group of convicts hand-picked by the US Military for experimentation, in hopes of creating the ultimate ’super-soldier.’ They have microchips in implanted in their brains. They follow an uploaded program, and can’t and won’t stop until their mission is complete. They’re enhanced. Besides the chip implants, they’ve had other body modifications; better vision, better hearing, quicker reflexes, performance-enhancing drugs for bigger muscles and more endurance. Their dopamineDopamine reviews and serotonin levels are enhanced, allowing  greater resistance to pain. Provided with the latest in body armor, they are almost indestructible. They are instruments of mass destruction. [Read more...]

–I had this great English teacher in college.  Worshiped the guy.  I was a physics major and yet, every semester I was trying to shoe-horn every one of this guy’s classes in as electives.  I was a sophomore physics major sitting in 400-level English classes with a small circle of other students that could actually spell.  Literally a small circle.  These were those tiny classes that sometimes don’t get taught because not enough students think the subject is important and the ones that do think they are so important they have to face each other instead of the teacher.  I was just there because I worshiped the wrinkled-old man who was teaching the class and who was probably gay for me in a less-abstract way than I was gay for him. [Read more...]

If there was an award for scariest dedication, Chelsea Cain wouldn’t have any competition. Her national bestseller, HeartsickHeartsick reviews, starts off with: “For Marc Mohan, who loved me even after he read this book”. I had to pause before I started the first chapter. What in the hell was I getting myself into? A pickle, that’s what. I have a bit of a problem here. I am giving this book our highest marks and I am about to lavish some serious praise on it, but I am by no means recommending this book to everyone. If anyone passed by and bought this book because they saw my five stars, and now you are back to determine what in the world I was thinking, all I can say is: I didn’t tell you so. Because you didn’t listen. [Read more...]