Cincinnati, Ohio – On Halloween night, Oxford police officer pulled over 20-year-old James Miller for finding him driving the wrong way down a one-way street with no headlights. As the officer approached Miller was observed stuffing chewing gum in his mouth. He was also wearing an awesome breathalyzer costume. Miller told the officer he had not been drinking that night, but cops found an open beer in the console of his car and beers in the front seat as well as the trunk. Turns out that Miller was almost two times the legal limit, sporting a blood alcohol level of .15. Miller was cited on charges including operating a vehicle while intoxicated, underage possession of alcohol, having an open container and a fake ID, and a one-way street violation. ClickClick reviews on to see him in costume. [Read more...]

Clark County, Wisconsin — Mary Strey, 49, started drinking earlier in the day and after visiting different bars around Neilsville, she had consumed seven or eight brandy and Cokes. But this didn’t stop her from getting behind the wheel of her car and attempt to drive home. But she didn’t make it there as police caught up with her after someone called 911 to report her. They found her parked on the side of the road and officers reported that her speech was slurred,, she stumbled, was swaying back and forth and could not perform the tests. Her blood alcohol level was 0.17. The odd thing about this story is the 911 caller who turned her in. It happened to be Mary Strey herself. After the jump, you can listen to the 911 call in which Strey called to report herself. Which is kinda classic as it includes this exchange:

Dispatch: You behind them?
Mary Strey: No, I am them.
Dispatch: You am them?
Mary Strey: Yes, I am them.
Dispatch: Okay, so you want to call and report you’re driving drunk?
Mary Strey: Yes.

Continue on to listen to the full 911 call.

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Goldsboro, North Carolina — Michael Earl Ricks, 47, has been convicted of armed robbery, common law robbery and writing worthless checks. He has recently been released from prison and luckily, Mary McDuffie and Christy Hughes let him come live with them in the trailer they rented. After a few hours of drinking, the two women got into an argument with Ricks and threatened to kick him out. Ricks became upset and took a trip to his employer, Best Sand and Gravel, and returned with a front-end loader bulldozer. While one of the women was on the phone with 911, Ricks used the bulldozer to destroy the trailer. You can listen to the moment he hit the trailer here. After he was done with the trailer, he then chased the two women as they ran to their landlord’s home. The women were not injured, and Ricks was arrested at the scene. He is being held under a $1,500 bond at the Wayne County jail on Monday, charged with damage to real property. [Read more...]

Sheboygan, Wisconsin – I’m not sure how many of you watch COPS or not, but for those of you who do, it is a well known fact that police do not give a shit about your stage of dress (or undress) when they haul your ass to jail. If they decide to get your naked ass a pair of shorts or not is really depending on how big of an asshole you are, as well as the cop you asking to get them. Julia Laack, 36, found this out when she attempted to disrobe to keep cops from taking her to jail after she got busted for shoplifting beef jerky and a lighter from a gas station. But naked or not, JuliaJulia reviews was not going without a fight. [Read more...]

Charleston, SC – Dash cam footage has been made public detailing City Council Member, Deborah Morinelli, after she drove her SUV into a ditch. The footage shows police removing a bunch of mini-bottles of wine (or as Jaded likes to call them – breakfast) from the vehicle. More disturbing than that is the footage of Morinelli as she wallows in a ditch, drunk off her ass. She attempts to stand several times, but cannot and eventually the police and rescue workers have to carry her. She was charged with driving under the influence and open container in a motor vehicle. She pleaded guilty and had to pay fines that total more than $2,500. Morinelli represents District 2 since 2002 but announced she will not be running for re-election. Watch the video after the jump to see why. [Read more...]

BETHLEHEM, Pa – Twin brothers Timothy and Thomas Willgruber, both aged 56, had a history of alcohol abuse and drunk driving. But not any longer. Last month the brothers were attending Celtic Fest, and Thomas was trying to help his drunk brother parallel park a minivan. For some drunken reason, Timothy lost control of the vehicle and ended up crushing Thomas’ leg in between the van and a parked SUV. Thomas died 8-hours later. Timothy failed the sobriety test at the scene and it was later revealed he had a blood-alcohol level of .20. Even though Bethlehem police Capt. David Kravatz says Timothy Willgruber was “devastated” after the accident and family members say the brothers were best friends, homicide charges were expected – but now that wont be necessary. Timothy hung himself on Tuesday. [Read more...]

Ocala, FL - I love Floriduh. You couldn’t pay me to live there, but I love it nonetheless. During my time here at the Dreamin’ Demon, Florida has provided me with many entertaining, sometimes gag-inducing stories. And this one, well, that would fall into the gag-inducing category. Please allow me to introduce 41-year-old Venus Lewis. Cute, ain’t she? Ms. Lewis enjoys football, tag, alcohol, and younger men. Much younger men. While attending a teen football game at the E.D. Croskey Recreation Center last SaturdaySaturday reviews, Venus allegedly initiated a rousing game of tag with a couple of teen boys. She laid out the rules: “If I catch ya, I’m gonna have sex with ya.” Simple enough. And I’m sure those lads ran their little legs right off!! (Personally, if Venus was playing that game with me, you can guaran-fucking-tee I would have set a new world land speed record). Weary from the chase, Venus took a breather and chose that little break in the fun and games to drop trou’ and plug her flow hole with a tampon. The stop-leak was in place, but Venus was still all worked up – she needed to relieve some tension, so, she allegedly leaned back on a picnic table and began masturbating. If the teens weren’t already traumatized after having watched the plug insertion, that had to have sent them over the edge. According to police reports, the boys were under the age of 16, and at some point, Venus attempted to grab the underdeveloped package of another young boy. Police believe that alcohol may have played a factor. No. Shit. Venus Lewis was booked on charges of lewd and lascivious exhibition and battery. She is being held on $25,000 bond. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to the store for a couple gallons of brainBrain Age reviews bleach. [Read more...]

MADEIRA BEACH, Florida – This is a story I am only posting because of one line in the article by Brant James that simply stated, “Then he started throwing sea creatures”. For some reason, this line cracked me up and has made my day. 41-year-old Keith Edward Marriott is facing charges of disorderly intoxication and carrying a concealed weapon because of his bizarre behavior at the beach. Pinellas County sheriff’s deputies said Marriott repeatedly pretended to be drowning and then float to the surface, “causing concern for his safety,” and was “loud and disruptive,” according to a sheriff’s report. Then he started throwing sea creatures. Or more specifically, he started throwing jellyfish at some teenagers. Marriott was being held at Pinellas County Jail in lieu of $250 bail. I love obnoxious drunks. [Read more...]

Wantagh, NY – Sister Lauren Hanley, the spiritual development director at St. Frances de Chantal Church, is just brimming with spirit – of the holy kind and of the distilled kind. The naughty nun is facing charges after she allegedly tied one on at church Tuesday evening, polishing off a half-pint of gin, before careening around town in a church owned Toyota. WitnessesWitnesses reviews report they saw Hanley side-swiping vehicles, zig-zaggin’ around on people’s lawns, and putting the fear of Jaysus into a couple of young neighborhood hellions. The little rascals were playing outside of a home when the flying nun flew past them in her speedy little race car. “She skidded out on the grass, then she came back down at like 55, 60 miles per hour down the street,” said 11-year-old Alex Stein after a near-death experience with the booze-hound. “It was very frightening at first, then you realize you can’t trust anybody.” The fun and games were over when Hanley slammed the car into a tree. Sister Hanley, who blew a 0.18, admitted to officers that she had started tipping the bottle at about 3:00 that afternoon. Officers discovered a plastic water bottle in the back seat of the Toyota that contained a small amount of alcohol. Hanley, 68, was arrested, charged with misdemeanor drunken driving, and released on her own recognizance that same evening. Alex Stein describes the chaos, on video, after the jump. [Read more...]

Green Township, Cincinnati – Here is an idiot for you. At around 9 p.m., 21-year-old Lauren rear-ended David Tewes in a Walgreen’s parking lot. After both got out of their respective vehicles, it was quite apparent that Lauren was shit-faced – her blood alcohol content later determined to be .205. Not wanting to get into any more trouble than she was already in, Lauren did the smart thing and left the scene of the accident. But that was only one of her problems added to her drunken stupidity. The other was the fact that her dumbass got into the vehicle she hit thinking it was hers. Oh, she left her 19-month-old daughter behind in her vehicle as well. She was arrested and charged with child endangering, driving while intoxicated, leaving the scene of an accident, failure to maintain reasonable control of a motor vehicle and a seat belt violation. Videovideo report after the jump.
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Tempe, AZ – Not a lot of story to this one, but there was enough to get my teeth grinding. On Saturday, Michelle Antone, 35, awoke from a nap at about 4:00 p.m. She must have been pretty sloshed before she closed her eyes, because when she woke up, she still had a pretty nasty buzz goin’ on. Anyway, when she came to, she got a bit antagonistic with her two daughters, ages 10 and 15. The girls, worried about the state their mother was in, locked her car keys in another room and fled the house. When the girls returned to the home a couple hours later, their mother demanded they hand over the keys – when the older girl told her mother she didn’t have access to the locked room, momma gave ‘em both a dose of pepper spray to the face and fled the house. Police caught up with the mean ass drunk a short time later and she was taken into custody. According to the arresting officers, Antone showed signs of impairment. She now faces two counts of aggravated assault.

Beggs, Oklahoma ” WalkingWalking reviews like a man, hitting like a hammer  She’s a juvenile scam, never was a quitter.  Tasty like a raindrop, she’s got the look.” (”The Look” Roxette) I can’t figure out which one of these beauties actually thought this, but from a police statement, at least one of them thought “that it brought her back to her teenage years. And that she got ‘that look”. Hahaha! Those two sentences cracked me up. The look of what, exactly? Someone rode hard and put away not only wet, but mildewed? And it doesn’t speak very highly of the teenage years when even then, you may have had to bribe boys with booze and drugs to get laid. And although these two gals were out of school by a few years (at least), their choice of partners weren’t. [Read more...]

Carrollton, Georgia – Last Tuesday, Lashirey Bryant had a family emergency to attend to out of town, so, she put in a call to her regular babysitter, Tammy Truitt, and asked her to come over and take care of the kiddos. Truitt was left in charge of four children, ages ranging from 1-9. Later that day, when the children’s grandmother arrived at the home to relieve the babysitter, she noticed her 1-year-old grandson was lifeless and unresponsive. After an examination at the hospital, it was revealed the little kiddo was drunk off his ass. His BAC was reported to be .33. Whaaaaat? In Georgia, that is considered to be four times the legal limit of drunkenness for an adult. [Read more...]

Gwinnett County, Georgia – God must have been in one of his foul moods the other day when 25-year-old Sabrina Stanek stepped out to the side of the road in front of her home. She was trying to tell the driver of a large truck to quit speeding down their residential street. The driver, Constantine Toncz, 39, had sped through the 25 mph neighborhood a few times already. As she tried to flag Toncz down, Toncz ran off the road and crushed Stanek between the front of his truck and the back of a parked vehicle. [Read more...]