Teen Live Streamed Her Dying Sister After Rollover CrashWoman Accused Of Filming Herself Molesting Two Children, Selling Videos OnlineMan Accused Of Pissing On Family Of Three At Metallica ConcertTeen Killed, Seven Injured After Ride Malfunctions At Ohio State FairFather Confessed To Punching His Baby In The Face Until He DiedTexas Teen Who Lied About Gang Rape Now Facing Felony ChargesElderly Man Found Dead Inside Elevator Almost A Month After Going MissingFather Beat Daughter To Death Because She Got Math Answers WrongGirl, 12, Killed After Father Runs Her Over With Power BoatMan Stashed Missing Girlfriend's Body In Freezer He Bought With New Girlfriend

Newport, TN — Police and paramedics were called to the home of a 38-year-old man Wednesday night in response to a rather bizarre stabbing incident – the man of the house apparently poked himself in the gut with a turkey thermometer to see if he was “done.”

The man in question, Scott Kelly, was found lying on a sofa in the home with a small stab wound in his gut.

When questioned, Kelly reportedly told officers he was “basting himself” and just wanted to be left alone. He then explained that he had stuck the thermometer into his stomach “to check his temperature, and to determine if he was done or not.”

Why, yes, alcohol was involved! How did you guess?

Kelly’s girlfriend told police the man had consumed a fifth of liquor and eight or nine beers before jabbing himself with the thermometer. Based on that information, I’m assuming Kelly was, in fact, done. Well done, even.

Kelly was transported to the hospital for treatment and a mental evaluation.…


Page 1 of 11