Marion, IA - Allow me to introduce Kristine Pflughaupt (gesundheit). Ms. Phisoderm Pflughaupt is gracing the pages here at the Dreamin’ Demon for a number of reasons – that awesome last name, her cheerful mugshot, drunken hyjinx, and because she’s a big fan of noodles.  It has been reported that on NovemberNovember reviews 3, a resident on Ms. Farfegnugen Pflughaupt’s mail route called police to complain that she had a strange mail carrier, in uniform and carrying a mail bag, sitting on the floor in her kitchen noshin’ on some left-over noodles. The homeowner, 95-year-old Marie O’Kelly, said she was watching TV in her living room when she heard a noise – she assumed it was her daughter coming for a visit, but grew suspicious when she didn’t receive a greeting from the girl. When she went to investigate the strange noise, she found Ms. Flobbernotten Pflughaupt sitting on the kitchen floor, eating noodles with her bare hands. “The noodles were running down her shirt. I asked her, ‘What are you doing here?’ She didn’t answer – she just kept eating those noodles.” Yum.  [Read more...]

Iowa City, IA - How inebriated must one be to feel that it is kosher to just drop trou’ and discharge a few ass apples in a public venue? I’m guessing one would have to have a B.A.C. somewhere in the vicinity of .24, give or take, and an IQ in that same general area. Demonites, please meet Mr. Robert E. Lee. Mr. Lee here allegedly entered a CVS Pharmacy Friday evening, ambled his way up front, lifted his shirt, dropped his pants, and dumped a load of sphincter spears. Then, without even bothering to wipe or wash, Mr. Lee walked out of the store. Ummm…ew? When the cops caught up with the butt nugget bandit, the slurred speech and aroma of alcohol gave him away. (Not to mention the .24). Mr. Lee, 57, was charged with fifth-degree criminal mischief and public intoxication – both misdemeanors. The store manager who reported the incident told police it would cost less than $200 to clean up the mess. (And a drawing of straws between employees, I’d imagine). All right, Morbid – let’s have one of those asstastic poop stories you are so fond of telling….you know you wanna! [Read more...]

Claremore, OK – With friends like Preston Dohrer, you might want to think about a life insurance policy. Or, hey, how about a whole new class of friends? As is evident in Preston’s Myspace pictures, he likes to party. And set shit on fire. And, as is evident with his dead friend, Michael Duke, Preston also likes to play with guns. Emergency personnel were called to Preston’s residence at about 1:45 SaturdaySaturday reviews morning. When they arrived, they found 20-year-old MichaelMichael reviews laying on the living room floor bleeding out of the gunshot wound to his forehead. Seems the boys had been drinking that night and horsin’ around a bit. WitnessesWitnesses reviews told police the two were involved in a bit of “horseplay” and were “playing around with each other and playing with knives.” Sounds like a rip-roaring good time to me! Let me grab my Ginsu! A witness to the horseplay told officers that Preston walked into his bedroom, returned to the living room, pointed a pistol at Michael’s head, and pulled the trigger. wOOt! What. Fucking. Fun. Now Michael Duke is dead and Preston Dohrer is charged with second-degree murder and feloniously pointing a weapon at another person. Bond has been set at $250,000. Great video of Preston “pissing fire” after the jump. I must warn you though, after viewing the video, I seem to have lost 3.5 IQ points. [Read more...]

Oakhurst, CA – When I came across this little story, three words came to mind: What. The. Hell? Here we have 37-year-old Krista Arceneaux – yes, a real looker, ain’t she?! A bit rough for 37, but with the right makeup, the right lighting, and a couple cases of Corona, she’d rank about a 5.5 or so. Krista was sitting outside of a bar last Wednesday evening when she spied a 6-year-old boy walking across a parking lot with his family. Whether it was because she was inebriated to the point of complete retardation or because she harbors some secret desire for little boys, Krista bolted from her chair, ran to the little kiddo, told him he was sexy, and laid on one him – tongue and all. Needless to say, the kiddos parents weren’t exactly thrilled with Krista’s nasty little show of affection and confronted her, sending her scurrying back to the bar. And that’s about the time Krista came a little unhinged. [Read more...]

St. Petersburg, Florida–Police received a call around midnight on FridayFriday reviews from Kimberly Crone, who said she was following a motorist who was driving erratically. Before the call to 911 had even ended, the erratic driver plowed into Ted Manooch’s truck, which was parked in front of his house. The driver hit the parked vehicle with enough force to slam it right into the house. After the accident, Kimberly said she jumped out of her car and heard a baby crying. “I tried to break the window, but I couldn’t break it with my hand.” [Read more...]

Keystone Heights, Florida–Sean Wells is a litterbug. If he hadn’t thrown a bottle out of a moving car, he may not be gracing the front page of the Dreamin’ Demon. But, he did…and it set off a whole chain of bizarre events. All of these events began at around 8:00 Monday morning. Wells tossed a glass bottle out of his car window, the bottle broke and a motorcyclist behind Wells’ car was hit with shattered glass. The guy on the motorcycle, Jeff Cruce, managed to get Wells to pull his car over. But, when Cruce confronted Wells about the glass, Wells put the car in reverse, hit Cruce in the leg, and sped off. [Read more...]

Port Angeles, Washington–How would you define stupid? Merriam-Webster defines it as such: stupid – adj. a. slow of mind: b. given to unintelligent decisions or acts: acting in an unintelligent or careless manner: c. lacking intelligence or reason. Makes sense. Now, how would I define stupid? Simple…Nelson Blewett. [Read more...]

Springfield, Ohio–But, the dumbass was getting her groove on as her two young children watched…from the back seat of the car. Danica Wallace, 24, and her boyfriend, Eric Welch, 29, both intoxicated and stoned, just couldn’t wait ’till they got home to do the nasty…so, they pulled off the road and started going at it. Look at their mugs and imagine them nekkid–nobody should have to witness that shit. Just thinking about the two of them all nekkid and sweaty makes my brain itchy. [Read more...]

Belinda Leighton

Belinda’s MyspaceMySpace (private)

Boca Raton, Florida–Easter Sunday at Belinda Leighton’s house sounds like a fucking blast! I’m going to see if I can score an invitation for next year. She doesn’t settle on the usual boring Easter traditions-i.e., candy eating, egg hunting, Easter brunch, more candy eating. No, Belinda likes to liven things up a bit with a little drinking, some driving, and death threats.

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Sacramento, CA – Grandfather Robert Mora was taking care of his eleven-month old granddaughter on Wednesday afternoon when he decided that it was time to stop in at Brownie’s Lounge in Sacramento for a little happy hour.  But, being the considerate grandfather that he is, Mora didn’t think a dive bar was the best place for an infant girl.  [Read more...]