Three Accused Of Strangling Friend With Jumper Cables As He Died Of Drug OverdoseMan Gets Life For Cutting Out Girlfriend's Lung While She Was Still AliveToddler Suffocated Under Bean Bag Chair As Unaware Daycare Worker Sat On ItMan In Critical Condition After Man Rapes Him With Bird Feeder Pole And Garden HoseMan Faces Life In Prison After Beating 4-Year-Old Daughter To Death With BeltMother Who Participated In The Rape And Murder Of 10-Year-Old Daughter Allowed Other Men To Rape Her DaughterWoman Accused Of Tossing Boiling Water On Boyfriend And Their BabyMan Dead After Cousins Decide To Test BulletProof Vest EffectivenessWoman Shot Teen Daughter's 31-Year-Old Boyfriend After Catching Them In Bed TogetherMan Charged With Decapitating Wife, Putting Head In Freezer

In The Mean Time...

Accused “Holy Man” Takes A Flying Leap

January 12, 2010 at 8:35 am by  

Joliet, IL – The Reverend Alejandro “Father Alex” Flores, 37, was about to be investigated on allegations of child molestation. Last week, the family of a 13-year-old boy contacted a priest at the Holy Family Parish regarding the alleged abuse of their son. Last Monday morning, Flores was removed from his position as parochial vicar at the church and was placed in a “monitored living situation” where he was to be kept away from children and, well, closely monitored. Even so, Flores managed to sneak away from his captors on Wednesday – just as detectives were on their way to interview him. Before they got the chance to have a talk with him, Flores was reported missing. As officers were taking the missing persons report, they were informed that a priest at the boarded up and unused St. Mary’s Carmelite Church had just called 911 – Flores had been found laying across some pews at the church, all broken and unconscious. Yes, Flores took a flying leap from about 20 feet up.…

Vernal, UT – On December 31st, Francis and Michelle Napolitano were visited by a caseworker from DCFS on allegations that their 5-year-old son was not receiving proper medical care – there seemed to be a problem with the boy’s feet, which resembled those of a burn victim. There were open blisters and bleeding sores. The skin on the child’s feet was “sloughing and curling into the air,” the toes black and shriveled and in different stages of decomposition. The injuries were so severe, the child required immediate hospitalization and it is feared that he may require partial amputation. When questioned about the condition of the child’s feet, Michelle stated that on December 23rd, the boy’s sibling placed an elasticized band around his legs. She informed authorities that she cut the band off with scissors the next day. The child’s doctor did say that the injuries are consistent with an elastic band being placed around the child’s legs; however, the band would have to have been on the boy for much longer than one day to cause such damage.…

Abel Aguirre Convicted For Bunny Buggery

January 11, 2010 at 2:24 pm by  

Chelsea, MA – As many of you know, we have quite the collection of “animal lovers” gracing our kick-ass website. Male and female. Oral and otherwise. We have stories of dog lovers and horse lovers aplenty. Oh, and let’s not forget Bryan James Hathaway, the opportunist who took advantage of a dead deer laying in a ditch. But, I gotta say, never, not in a bajillion years, did I think I would be writing a story about some fucktard facing prison time because he loved a bunny. Last Friday, Abel Aguirre, 38, was convicted on charges of animal cruelty for porkin’ his roommate’s rabbit. On June 1st of ’08, Abel’s roommate came home to a very disturbing scene – in the bathroom, she found blood and clumps of rabbit fur. A bloody claw that used to be attached to her pet rabbit was among the icky mess on the bathroom floor and the bunny itself was injured and bleeding. Upon further investigation, the woman discovered a used condom, covered in rabbit fur, in Abel’s bedroom.…

Chris Grant Kicked Chuvi-Duvi’s Ass

January 11, 2010 at 12:58 pm by  

I missed this one when it was first reported, but I wanted to help publicize what a complete jack-off 21-year-old Chris Grant is. Police were going over the surveillance video of a housing development in upper Manhattan during a murder investigation. I don’t know if they found what they were looking for in that case, but what they did find was video footage of Grant kicking the shit out of his girlfriend’s dog while in the elevator. The 12-pound Pomeranian-Chihuahu named Chuvi-Duvi can be seen repeatedly and violently kicked by Grant. He even calls the dog over in a friendly manner, only to kick the shit out of the dog again. Grant has been charged with torturing and injuring the animal. Chuvi-Duvi was taken to an animal hospital and released. Click on if you want to see the actual footage, but be warned animal lovers out there, it’s upsetting.…

Chicago – While looking for an image to use in the pants-less driver story, I stumbled upon this story. On Thursday afternoon Reginald Ray, 42, was arrested shortly after leaving a North Side Starbucks. Witnesses claim that Ray had been inside fondling himself while staring at women. One witness even recorded his actions on cell phone video and burned it to DVD. I am hoping that this person finds us and anonymously emails us a clip so we can post it. Ray was charged with two counts of public indecency and one count of possession of cannabis, all misdemeanors. Like I asked in the other story, anyone have any public flashing stories? Not talking about your drunk-ass flashing your tits for some cheap beads at Mardi Gras…but rather some perv jacking his cock at you in a Wal-Mart or something. What do you think should be done with people like this? Are they harmless, or embarking in behavior that leads to more serious crimes?…

Police Looking For Pantsless Driver

January 11, 2010 at 10:50 am by  

BROOKLINE, Mass. – I swear to God this is not me. I don’t live anywhere near Massachusetts. Two young girls were walking home from Lincoln School sometime after 2 p.m. Thursday when a man drove up asking for directions. He was not wearing pants. Police said the man did not expose himself to the girls or say anything suggestive, but they don’t want to take any chances and have alerted parents in the area – especially since the street he wanted directions to did not exist. The driver is described as a man in his late 20s or early 30s, with curly brown hair (snicker). Anyone with information is asked to call Brookline police at 617-730-2222. I never get these people who expose themselves in public like this. Anyone ever have any experiences with someone flashing their junk at you?…

Man Arrested For Assisting In Friend’s Suicide

January 11, 2010 at 10:29 am by  

BUTLER, Indiana – Neighbors heard a small pop come from the home of Robert Crow on Wednesday before police showed up. They also saw the body of Jaime Jasso, 43, laying in the garage, dead from a single gunshot wound to the head. Now Crow has been arrested and charged with assisting a suicide. Turns out that Crow and Jasso are friends from work. Jasso had come over to Crow’s house and at some point mentioned his desire to kill himself. Crow then gave Jasso a handgun which he then used to put a bullet in his brain. Crow called 911. To me, that should be the end of this story except that Crow would not be charged with anything. It is reported that this man has been wanting to do this for some time. A friend of both Crow and Jasso told reporters that Jasso had been going through some personal issues and he had talked Jasso out of committing suicide several times. He would have ended his life at some point with or without Crows help.…

Affadavit Alleges Starving Baby Ate Own Feces

January 11, 2010 at 10:14 am by  

Montville, Connecticut – John Berkery, 35, and Christine Berkery, 32 have both been charged with two counts of risk of injury to a minor and cruelty to persons after allegations that they intentionally starved two of Christine’s children. Christine’s 1-year-old daughter, according to the arrest affidavit, was so hungry that she ate her own feces. The little girl weighs 15lbs — the same amount she weighed at 6-months-old. Her 14-year-old daughter told investigators that when she told her mother of her little sister eating her own shit, she just laughed. The teen also stated that her step-father would make inappropriate comments about her, remarking on what a nice butt she had. But that’s not all. Christine’s two middle children are currently in foster care after one of John’s sons was accused of molesting them back in July.…

UNITED STATES – The US Justice Department released a report yesterday detailing the truth about youth prisons- about 12% (1 in8) of juveniles are raped and sexually abused while in correctional facilities. More than half of the kids held in these types of jails are under the age of 16- and the abuse isn’t just coming from fellow inmates. It’s also at the hands of the prison staff, with 80% of abused juveniles reporting that their facilities staff members had raped or sexually abused them. In addition to these outrageous numbers, 65% of the inmates said they had been abused in their current facility as well as past locations! Bisexual and homosexual juveniles reported the most abuse; the documentation says that these inmates are 10 times more likely to be sexually abused then their heterosexual counterparts. Now, obviously these kids made mistakes, some of them very serious, that landed them in these facilities- but this report details intense, violent and appalling cracks in our prison system, with far reaching sexual abuse of minors being the norm!…

Artie Lange’s Suicide Attempt

January 10, 2010 at 11:48 am by  

HOBOKEN, NJ– Actor and comedian Artie Lange, best known for his time on the Howard Stern show, drove a 13 inch kitchen knife into his stomach nine times in a violent and bloody suicide attempt. His mother found him lying on the floor of his house last week, unconscious but still alive. He was taken to Jersey Medical Center where doctors performed surgery on the obviously troubled Lange. Six of the wounds are being called “hesitation wounds”, while the other three went very deep into his body. There has been no statement from Lange, who’s battled with depression and addiction issues in the past. A spokesperson for Lange confirmed that the star has been discharged, but refused to comment on his condition.…

Bangor, PA – A teacher’s aide at Bangor Area High School is in a bit of a pinch after leaving her cell phone unattended. Seems the woman had taken a nekkid picture of herself and had it stored on her cell. Someone got a hold of that unattended cell phone at a non-school event, scrolled through the picture files, hit pay dirt, and started forwarding said nudie pic to students at the high school. The picture was then forwarded to damn near every one in town. “My sister’s seen it. Actually, my dad came home and said that people were passing it around,” said Bangor Area High School student Adrianna Carpelli. The woman, a six-year employee of the school district, is now being asked to resign from her position. And they ain’t asking her real nice like, either. Bangor Area Superintendent John Reinhart says that if the woman doesn’t resign on her own, she will be terminated. He seems to think her ability to work with district teens “has been compromised.” Why, you ask?…

Miami, Florida – Passers-by noticed a fire inside a Miami dumpster and alerted authorities. The cause of the fire turned out to be the body of 26-year-old Paula Sladewski. It took two days to identify Sladewski, who stars in the video “Playboy: The Ultimate Playmate Search”, because she was so severely burned that officials had to identify her using dental records. Her boyfriend, Kevin Klym, 34, has been named a person of interest although he denies having anything to do with her death. He claims the last he saw her was during the early morning hours of Sunday inside a Miami nightclub – right before he was kicked out after the pair got into a shouting argument. Klym claims he then took a taxi back to their hotel room, leaving Sladewski at the club. Sladewski’s stepfather, Richard Watkins, doesn’t understand why he would just leave his daughter there, and also revealed that the couple’s two year relationship was often a violent one. Court records show that during the summer, Sladewski was arrested for breaking a bottle over Klym’s head and in December, Klym was arrested for braking  Sladewski’s nose during an argument.…

Dry Clean Only, Idiot

January 8, 2010 at 8:56 am by  

Cleveland, OH – When Steve McClairn felt his 7-year-old daughter was disobeying him, he decided to teach her a lesson. He picked her up and carried her, kicking and screaming, to the clothes dryer. The ass tossed her in and turned the machine on. Normally, you probably wouldn’t be able to get a 7-year-old stuffed into a dryer (not like I’ve tried or anything), but Steve’s daughter suffers from a medical condition that has left her small and frail. The child, who stands less than 4 feet tall and weighs about 39 pounds, was left to tumble in the dryer for a short period of time. The child informed a school counselor about her spin in the dryer and the counselor alerted the police. Dumbass was arrested and charged with endangering children, kidnapping, and domestic violence. His bond was set at $100,000. Oh them pesky kids – they really should come with an instruction manual and care labels at birth, ya know? I mean, who knew you couldn’t just throw little precious into the dryer and set it to fluff?…

Michael Wondra Likes To Spoon

January 8, 2010 at 6:17 am by  

Roberts, WI – Another story with very little information but a whole lot of OMGWTF!?!? Meet Michael Wondra. (Myspace) The 25-year-old is looking at animal cruelty charges after police accused him of sticking a plastic spoon into a dog’s ass. On January 1, a neighbor became concerned after hearing the distressed dog continually yelping for a good hour or two. The neighbor went to check on the animal and found a plastic spoon sticking out of the dog’s behind. When officers arrived, they recovered an 8″ plastic spoon covered in blood and fecal matter. The dog, a 9-month-old Golden Lab, had a punctured intestine and needed to be euthanized due to the extent of it’s injuries. Michael, a resident of the home where the dog was found, was arrested on suspicion of intentional mistreatment of animals. At this time, it is not clear if Michael was the dog’s human.…

Dallas, TX – At the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve, Kerri Lyn Smith’s boyfriend leaned in for a kiss. Little did the poor fucker know, he, at some point, did something to piss her the hell off. What he did/said/thought is unknown. And when he committed the atrocious offense, whether it be real or Kerri’s imagination, is also unknown. She showed him her displeasure by biting his lip off and spitting it out. She bit his bottom lip right the hell off his face. He was able to push her crazy ass away and summon help via 911. (Would you consider me twisted if I told you that I would love to hear the actual 911 recording? I’m running it through my head right now, and yes, it sounds kinda funny). Police say they aren’t sure why Smith was so pissed, but when they arrived at the home, they found the boyfriend’s lip laying on the floor. I don’t know, but I’m thinking alcohol may have played a role in the whole bloody incident.…

Timothy Victoria Multi-Tasks

January 8, 2010 at 3:57 am by  

Houston, TX – Not much info on this one yet, but on January 4th, officers were dispatched to a home on a report of a triple stabbing. At the scene, a 27-year-old woman was found stabbed to death, her 4-year-old daughter was critically wounded, and 29-year-old Timothy Victoria (Myspace) was found to be suffering from a small stab wound to the stomach. When the child was taken to the hospital, it was discovered that not only had she been stabbed, she’d been sexually assaulted. Though seriously injured, the child was able to shed some light on the incident. According to detectives, the woman was stabbed to death by Timothy, her boyfriend, after she walked in and caught him sexually assaulting her daughter. Timothy initially claimed to be a victim, but investigators believe his minor stab wound was self inflicted. He is now being charged with capital murder. The little girl is hospitalized in critical condition, but is expected to survive.…

Kenosha, WI- On Saturday, officers in Wisconsin were alarmed to discover what they are calling one of the most disturbing abuse cases they had ever encountered. Inside a residence in Kenosha, police found a 2 1/2 year old child strapped in a car seat in a small, dark room. His face was covered, his diaper loaded, and his hair infested with lice. But that was not the worst of it. In the dining room of the home, a 38-year old woman was found lying on the floor covered in urine and feces with her left ankle was chained to a weight bench. The frail woman appeared to weigh no more than 70 pounds and, after the chain was cut, she could not straighten her legs, stand or walk. What kind of monsters would do something so cruel and callous? Sally Adams, 56, and her son, Ernest Claiborne, 34. Sally, the mother of the chained woman and grandmother to the neglected child, at first told police she did not know who had chained her daughter up.…

Richard Bolinger Was Obsessed

January 7, 2010 at 12:10 pm by  

Daytona Beach, FL – Richard Bolinger, 55, had a crush. She caught his eye back in August when she entered the convenience store where he had been hired to perform odd jobs. He wanted to build a relationship with her and began to shower her with sweet little gifts and sugary treats. Months passed. The crush soon turned into an obsession – he started showing up at her home with more gifts and Hannah Montana CD’s. Wait….what? Hannah Montana? Oh yeah, did I forget to mention the object of his affection is three? When crazy man started showing up at the homeless shelter where she and her parents were staying, her parents got a little freaked out. No longer did they visit the convenience store where Richard worked. As a matter of fact, they rearranged their entire daily schedule to avoid running into him. Undaunted, Richard continued with his creepy tactics, even going as far as riding past the shelter on his scooter 3-4 times a day. When the child’s father demanded that he stay away from the girl, Richard rearranged his schedule and rode past only after daddy went to work.…