Wife Charged With Murdering Husband, Living With Dismembered Remains For MonthsWoman Died After Getting Her Head Stuck In Fence Outside Chicago BankGun Range Employee Cleaning Rifle Accidentally Shot And Killed CustomerMom Cracked Newborn's Skull After Throwing Him At His Father During ArgumentMan Accused Of Ejaculating Into Female Co-worker's Water Bottles, Honey JarMan Admits To Having Sex With Dead Girlfriend In Attempt To Wake Her UpChinese Factory Scalped After Her Hair Gets Caught In MachineryGirl, 13, Hanged Herself In Bedroom After Years Of Being Bullied At SchoolMan Beat 4-Month-Old Daughter To Death Because She Was CryingGirl, 10, Committed Suicide After Fight Video Was Posted Online

In The Mean Time...

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. — A self-discribed Wiccan, 30-year-old Angela Sanford, has been in jail charged with last month’s stabbing death of 52-year-old Joel Leyba. She claims that she invited Leyba to a popular hiking trail in Albuquerque to join her in a Wiccan celebration of spring. She claims that while there,  Libya attacked her and attempted to rape her. She claims she pretended to want to have sex and then stabbed Leyba three times in the stomach in an act of self-defense. But police claim the evidence does not support her story. They claim that Sanford lured Leyba to the hiking trail with every intention of killing him. Aside from her account being a bit shady, it does not help her defense that Lebya was listed in Sanford’s cell phone as “sacrifice”. “It makes us absolutely confident there was something more here than her claims of self-defense,” said Patrick Davis, a spokesman for the Bernalillo County district attorney’s office.…

Summerfield, FL – If I were to be granted just one superpower, it would be the ability to make people ‘poof’ from existence with the flick of a wrist. Though my ‘list’ is already rather full, there is always room for assholes like Michael McLachlan. Wednesday evening, Michael supposedly witnessed his ex (the exact nature of the relationship between the two has yet to be disclosed) kissing her new boyfriend. Incensed, Michael stormed into the woman’s home and into the bedroom of her 5-year-old daughter. When the woman walked into the residence to see what was up, Michael was allegedly standing in the child’s room, over the child, fully dressed with his hands on his pants as if he was pulling them up or down. The child’s underwear had been pulled down. The woman ordered Michael out of her home and called police. When police arrived at the home, the woman told them Michael had a crowbar and had been acting combative. When deputies approached Michael, he made a rather stunning admission.…

Shad Jenkins Upholds Skeevy Family Tradition

April 9, 2010 at 4:48 am by  

Lincoln, NE – When a 6-year-old boy was found acting out sexually with a 4-year-old child last month, authorities learned the child had been sexually assaulted himself. When questioned, the boy told officers that his uncle taught him how to do those naughty things. When police talked to Uncle Perv (aka Shad Jenkins), they discovered he had molested his nephew on at least two separate occasions in September and December of last year. Furthermore, it was revealed that Shad was molested by a family member when he was a child. Seems his own father partook in a bit of boy buggery. Damn…talk about your nasty vicious cycle. I would recommend a healthy dose of bleach for that particular gene pool, but it’s obviously way too late. Shad Jenkins, 22, has been charged with first-degree sexual assault of a child and third-degree sexual assault of a child. His bond was set at $250,000. Shad is about as smart as he looks – perv has at least 10 different Myspace profiles, all mostly blank and unused.…

Baby’s Testicles Severed In Pit Bull Attack

April 9, 2010 at 3:20 am by  

Murrieta, CA – Carrie McKinney, 22, was at her boyfriend’s home Saturday morning when she placed her 6-month-old son, who was strapped in a car seat, on the floor. Carrie then headed into another room with her boyfriend, Doug Ritchey, leaving the infant alone in a room with Doug’s 70-pound pit bull and 60-pound pit bull mix. After an unknown period of time, Carrie and Doug heard the child screaming – when they entered the room, Carrie noticed one of the dogs had the boy’s diaper in it’s mouth. One or both of the dogs had attacked the baby…had torn his diaper off and chewed on his scrotum. Though Carrie and Doug were fortunate enough to rescue the infant before further damage could be done, they were too late to save the kid from losing his testicles – they’d been chewed off. Yes, the child’s testicles are gone forever and he will require testosterone for the rest of his natural life. Jesus. Fucking. Christ. Thanks for lookin’ out, Ma! Though no arrests have been made, Carrie has temporarily lost custody of her son and could potentially face criminal neglect charges.…

Oregon – On December 4th, 6-year-old Samantha Kuberski was sent to her room after getting into an argument with her mother. When the mother went to check on the 1st grader some time later, she found her daughter hanging from an unused crib, a corduroy belt tied around her neck. Her mother tried to revive her but Samantha would die later at the hospital. We posted the death back in December and of course, a lot of people suspected the mother had something to do with it. But now the medical examiner has ruled the death a suicide. The investigating police and the parents feel that this was not a suicide, but rather a tragic accident. “Our investigators feel that it does appear that Samantha may have done the actions that led to her death,” said Captain Dennis Marks. “But we find it hard to believe that she would have intentionally done that, which we feel is part of committing suicide.” But chief medical examiner for Oregon state, Dr. Karen Gunson told KGW News, “Statements were made by the girl that indicated she was going to kill herself… She had the means and she realized that if she put something around her neck that was dangerous and could cause death — because her parents had told her that.…

Pekin, IL – Franklin Shue, 51, is being held on charges of predatory criminal sexual assault after he allegedly raped a 7-year-old girl while watching pornography in his home. The Illinois Department of Children and Family Services notified law enforcement on March 31st after receiving a report that the child was being sexually assaulted. According to the victim, she was alone in a room with Shue watching a movie “where people had their clothes off” when he allegedly raped her. When questioned, Shue admitted to spooning with the child on the couch, and well, it was “possible” he may have “accidentally” had genital contact with her genitals. Huh. Too bad the pervy fucker didn’t accidentally stick the offending member into a garbage disposal. The asswipe remains behind bars at Tazewell County Justice Center with a $250,000 bond.…

St. Johnsbury, VT – Details on this one are a bit sketchy, but it seems as though Laurie Davenport has been putting her adopted daughter through pure hell for the past couple of years. In 2008, Davenport pleaded guilty to charges she left a 9-year-old child locked in a bedroom while she went to work. She spent 2 months in jail and the child was later returned to her. That same child reportedly ran away in December of ’09 and was once again returned to Davenport after the child reported she wasn’t being abused. Fast forward to March – Davenport’s parenting skills are once again being questioned. This time, the allegations of abuse include sexual assault and torture. Prosecutors are accusing Davenport of beating the 11-year-old with a hammer, a shovel and firewood. She allegedly forced the child to bathe in boiling hot water. She is accused of cutting the child’s legs and the area around her “private parts” with a knife, burning her with a curling iron and cookie sheets, and using pliers to pull out the kid’s teeth.…

Fart Fetish Leads To Rape

April 8, 2010 at 5:32 am by  

Oklahoma City, OK – Due to the nature of this crime, the names of the participants involved have been changed to preserve anonymity. On May 2nd, police responded to a call from a 27-year-old man, Mr. X, who claimed to have been raped. Mr. X, who is reportedly autistic, informed officers that he was an eproctophiliac. Not familiar with that term? Let me help you out – Mr. X has a flatulence fetish – he likes both the sound and smell of farts. oO!! Anyway, Mr. X was lonely and wanted to make some new friends, preferably one with a few of the same interests. He found a new friend, who we will call Mr. Y, through airg.com, which appears to me to be some kind of random text hook-up meat market type thing. The two began talking online in January and eventually exchanged their digits and texts. Hundreds of texts. The texts soon turned graphic and sexual in nature, and because they were slightly worrisome to Mr. X, he figured he’d save a few in case “he might eventually need them as evidence.” Though some of the pertinent information has been censored on the police report, here are some snippets of said texts.…

Fake Craigslist Ad Leads To Sexual Assault

April 7, 2010 at 2:53 pm by  

WEST HARTFORD, Conn. – I’m sitting here on my deck, sans pants, catching up on things in preparation for my glorious return to the site tomorrow when I came across a true idiot that I just had to get posted. Someone posted a fake Craigslist ad that claimed a 40-year-old woman was looking to have sex with as many men as possible. Included with the ad was an address. The entire post was a prank of some sort, possibly against the family living at the address listed. But because pussy really does make men as stupid as dick does women, a dozen men actually showed up at the home looking for the horny woman. But that’s not the real stupid part. The prank had some collateral damage in the form of an 18-year-old girl who lives nearby. See, one of the men who answered the ad was 29-year-old Richard Zeh. Supposedly dyslexic, Zeh went to the wrong address. But even when he was told that he had the wrong address by the teen girl who answered the door, Zeh wasn’t having it and ended up charged with misdemeanor sexual assault, burglary and more.…

Florence, AL- There are always two sides to every story, but if this one is true, then Jimmy McKinney is a 49-year old man pussy who likes to pick on young girls. On March 30, McKinney and a 12-year old girl were sitting in a car outside her home. McKinney, who is a family acquaintance, kept questioning the girl about her mother, but the girl refused to answer his questions and said she wanted to talk about her day at school instead. That was when McKinney got pissed and hit the girl in the face with his fist. Because she was afraid of McKinney, the girl told her mother her injury happened at school. However, the next morning when her mother was headed to the school to talk with the teacher and principal, the girl finally fessed up and said it was McKinney who struck her. The girl’s mother contacted police and Jimmy McKinney was arrested and charged with child abuse. If this is true, then this jackass needs a rude awakening on what it is like to feel small, helpless, and weak.…

Chicago, IL- I love hearing stories like this! Around 1 a.m. last Friday, a man carrying a knife and smelling of alcohol broke into Susana Reteguin’s apartment and crawled into her bed. Susana woke up, got off the bed, and screamed,“Who are you, let me see your face.” The two began to struggle and then the man knocked her down. When Susana’s 11-year old son, Luis Reteguin, heard his mother screaming for help, he immediately got up and ran into her room. Once Luis saw his mother was bleeding, he confronted the man and screamed, “Let go of my Mom!” Then the  brave boy opened a pint-sized can of whoop-ass onto the stranger and began punching the man in the face. “I started to punch the guy in the face,” said Luis. “I think he had glasses because I saw them later on the floor, then he pushed me in the bathroom and started stabbing me.”

Andrew Roberts Was Having A Bad Day

April 7, 2010 at 7:37 am by  

Slidell, LA – When you are experiencing a real bastard of a day, how do you deal with it? Numb yourself with alcohol? Roll out your life-size poster of Morbid and play pin the tail on the ass? Crawl into a corner, assume the fetal position and whine for your mommy? Grab your significant other’s spawn by the feet and slam her tiny head into the ground a few times? Boy, that’s a tough one, no? I usually do a combo of #1-3, though not necessarily in that order. Andrew Roberts went with option #4. Yes, Demonites, poor little Andrew was having a bad day last Thursday. And to make matters worse, he was stuck babysitting his girlfriend’s 22-month-old daughter while she was out earning a living. When the toddler had an accident in her pants, Andrew attacked. He allegedly picked the child up by her ankles and repeatedly slammed her head against the floor. When he was through with his murderous temper tantrum, he ran the child next door to her grandma’s house and gave grandma the old “baby fell off the couch” bullshit.…

Columbus, OH – When 19-year-old Danielle Pickens showed up at her cousin Evelyn’s house for Easter dinner wearing short jean shorts and a midriff baring t-shirt, Evelyn came straight the fuck unglued. According to her, Danielle’s outfit was “inappropriate and disrespectful” to wear to Easter dinner. But, according to family members, Evelyn started getting all worked up only after she noticed that her husband noticed Danielle’s revealing outfit. Hmmmm. A fight ensued, with Evelyn accusing Danielle of “flaunting her body,” and for a time, the two struggled over a baseball bat. Danielle’s sister broke up the fight and escorted Danielle out of the house and into her car. As the two were settling into the car, Evelyn stormed out of the house with a gun, pulled Danielle out of the vehicle by her hair and shot her once in the head. She then walked back into the house, told everyone what she did and calmly called the police. …

Liverpool, UK– Remember the movie Weekend At Bernie’s? These two sneaky ol’ dames must have seen it because on Saturday, police arrested them when they tried to smuggle a dead relative onto a flight out of England. Like the movie, they must have thought, “Why don’t we just pretend he didn’t die? Just for a bit!” The women, aged 41 and 66, covered the deceased 91-year old man’s face with sunglasses and managed to travel with the dead guy in a taxi from their home in Oldham, northwestern England, to the terminal. Once there, they pushed the dead man in a wheelchair and tried to board a flight to Berlin at Liverpool’s John Lennon airport. When officials became suspicious and began probing the corpse, the women protested and claimed he was merely asleep.The women were detained on suspicion of failing to give notification of death of a 91-year-old man. They have been released on bail and police say inquiries are continuing.…

McHenry, MS- Easter at the Sexton home this year was a tad different than most. When a dispute erupted between Samuel Sexton, 57, and his son, Andrew, that morning, Samuel went outside with a shotgun and shot at his son. Not wanting to stick around for any more Easter surprises, Andrew hopped in a friend’s car and left. Police arrived at the scene and, fearing Andrew may have been seriously hurt, they told area hospitals to be on alert. After a few hours, one of Andrew’s friends who had been present at the time of the shooting was able to reach him by cell phone. Andrew told the friend that he was okay and his injuries  were minor. Andrew refused to return home to answer deputies’ questions because he is on probation. While the officers were walking around the home looking for blood spatters, they discovered some shake bottles in the garbage can related to meth. After a search, a meth lab was found on the property. Samuel Wayne Sexton was arrested for pulling a shotgun on his son and pulling the trigger.…

Toddler Gets Bitch Slapped For Eating Pringles

April 6, 2010 at 7:31 am by  

Birmingham, AL – Justin James Warren Green has way too many fucking names and is in dire need of an attitude adjustment. After his toddler daughter was seen in the emergency room last week, sporting abrasions and a man-sized hand print on her face, Green was arrested and booked on child abuse charges. Dipshit daddy dearest confessed to getting all slap-happy with the 2-year-old because she had eaten his barbecue Pringles. Come the fuck on. I love my junk food as much as the next chickie, and though I may threaten to maim and/or mutilate any adult fool stupid enough to eyeball my goodies, I would never actually follow through (much). Anyone who could bitch slap a toddler for anything deserves the same treatment – hundredfold. And besides, barbecue Pringles taste like ass. Charged with willful abuse of a child, Green, 22, has been released on $10,000 bond. Come on over to my place, asshole – let me school you on the finer points of sharing. There is no word on the child’s condition.…

Elkmont, AL- Here is another short one that is packed with just enough “WTF?” to make the front page. When authorities in Elkmont began investigating a puppy mill owner by the name of Nannie Johnson, they got a gruesome surprise. Inside Johnson’s freezer last Friday, they found several dead dogs. Nannie Johnson, 63, was charged with 43 counts of cruelty to animals after a total of 43 dogs were found dead at her home. One dog was found dead inside a kennel and the remainder were wrapped in plastic and stored inside the freezer.The investigators did find 29 still alive, but all of them were emaciated and suffering from parasites and three have since died. Stanley McNatt with the Sheriff’s Department said, “She has, in the past, genuinely raised animals and has sold animals. I just don’t know if she just became overwhelmed and unable to tend to the animals properly, but whatever the case it was pretty bizarre.” Johnson is being held in jail on $32,250 bond.…

Boca Raton, FL- A shop owner in Boca Raton got her big girl panties in a wicked wad last Friday when one of her employees clogged her toilet. Medicine Shoppe owner Andrienne Chung was arrested on a simple battery charge after she struck her employee, Steven Spielberger (Ha! What a name!) with a chair. Chung admitted to police that she became pissed off when she learned what Spielberger had done and felt he was, “too lazy to get toilet paper and shoved napkins down the toilet, causing the toilet to overflow all over the store.” When questioned if she struck him with a chair, Chung said she was defending herself from Spielberger. I’m sure the police wanted to believe her cute, frumpy, little face, but surveillance video showed different. It showed Chung picking up a chair and and then she poked at Spielberger with it. Spielberger kicked the chair away and that was when Chung struck him with the chair. When the officers tried to place Ms. Chung under arrest, she refused to place her hands behind her back and kicked an officer in the groin.(Not smart) The police ended up having to use a Taser gun to tame the crazy lady and as well as being arrested for simple battery, the charges of resisting arrest with violence and battery on a law enforcement officer were added to the list.…