Man Threatened To Kill Wendy's Employee Over Shortage Of Cucumbers In SaladWoman Accused Of Fatally Shooting Cheating Boyfriend In CrotchElderly Man Found Dead Inside Elevator Almost A Month After Going MissingTeen Live Streamed Her Dying Sister After Rollover CrashMan Arrested After Girl, 7, Stated He Raped Her "Thousands Of Times"Woman Gets Death Sentence For The Murder Of 10-year-Old Girl She Locked In Storage ContainerFather Confessed To Punching His Baby In The Face Until He DiedWoman Charged With Murder After Her Pit Bulls Mauled Her Grandson To DeathWoman Sentenced After Leaving Her Toddler In Desert To DieMother Accused Of Letting Infant Starve To Death Strapped In Car Seat

In The Mean Time...

PIEDMONT, OK — I don’t know if there is more going on with this story or Piedmont is so free from crime that the cops there have nothing to do — but one police officer issued a woman a $2500 ticket after her 3-year-old son took a leak in his own front yard.

Be sure to remind yourself that the following info is coming only from one side, but the mother of the boy says her toddler was in the front yard when he did what real men do and stopped what he was doing to take a piss in the front yard.

“Dillan pulled down his pants to pee outside, I guess, and the cop pulled up and asked for my license and told me he was going to give me a ticket for public urination,” said the boy’s mother, Ashley Warden. The boy’s grandmother said the officer didn’t care that the boy was 3-years-old, that it was still public urination.

They also say they live in a rural area on two-acres of land, but that this particular officer parks his car at the end of their street on a daily basis.…

Cleveland, OH — Looks like I lost some readers with my latest Facebook post regarding my run for President and my promise, if elected, to make women take five driving courses a month in order to keep their driver’s license. Someone even took time away from doing housework to call me a sexist asshole. The nerve.

All I was trying to do was keep women from ending up like the one in Ohio who routinely used the sidewalk to pass a stopped school bus who has now been ordered to stand on the side of the road wearing a sign that states she’s an idiot.

For those of you who missed the story, a Cleveland Metropolitan School District bus driver got fed up with a female driver who was in the habit of using the sidewalk to pass his stopped school bus as he loaded and unloaded kids. The driver of the bus, Uriah Herron, contacted police who then set up a trap to nab the woman. You can watch the day she was busted here:

The driver of the vehicle seen in the video was 32-year-old Shena Hardin.…

Pittsburgh, PA — A 2-year-old boy met a horrific end on yesterday after he fell into the African painted dog exhibit at the Pittsburgh Zoo & Aquarium and was subsequently mauled to death as relatives and bystanders watched, unable to help the boy.

The attack happened at about 11:45 a.m. Sunday after the boy’s mother picked him up and placed him on top of a railing at the edge of a viewing deck so that he could get a better view of the dogs. “Almost immediately after that he lost his balance, fell down off the railing into the pit, and he was immediately attacked by 11 dogs,” Lt. Kevin Kraus of the Pittsburgh police said. “It was very horrific.”

The boy fell 11 to 14 feet from the railing to the ground below, and it’s not yet known if it was the fall that killed the boy, or the pack of dogs that mauled him. Here’s an image of the viewing deck. It doesn’t look like it was high enough for a fatal fall, so one can only hope the boy was unconscious after he hit the ground and did not experience the attack that followed.…

JACKSONVILLE, N.C. — I missed this story and to be honest, I doubt I would have posted it had I seen it when it was first being reported.

But since I suffer for you guys (some say just like Jesus), I will write another child abuse story today, a subject I like least of all. (*hears waaay too many tiny violins playing*)

A woman in North Carolina has been charged with felony child abuse inflicting serious bodily injury and mental emotional injury after she became so enraged over her 9-month-old daughter’s crying, that she poured boiling water on her.

Police say that 33-year-old Michelle Julia Woodhouse-Deboyes became angry with her daughter’s crying that she flipped the girl’s bouncy seat over with the baby still in it.

The resulting bruise to her daughter’s face did not her crying, so Woodhouse-Deboyes switched tactics. She went into the kitchen and filled a coffee mug with boiling water then poured the boiling water on top of her crying daughter. Still not getting the result she was looking for, Woodhouse-Deboyes flipped her daughter over and held her down in the hot water that had puddled on the floor.…

MOUNT PLEASANT, MI — The pastor in Michigan who admitted to beating and strangling his 24-year-old neighbor on Halloween told police he had fantasized for weeks about killing her and having sex with her dead body.

John Douglas White, the 55-year-old pastor at Christ Community Fellowship in Mount Pleasant, told police that after getting drunk and watching violent pornography, he broke into Rebekah Gay‘s trailer next door. He says Gay woke up and walked into the kitchen where he hit her over the head with a rubber mallet multiple times. When he realized she was still breathing, he strangled her with a zip tie.

At some point during the attack, Gay reportedly said, “I know you.” She should, as White was dating Gay’s mother and often helped Gay with her 3-year-old son. The boy was actually in the trailer while White murdered his mother, although police do not know if he heard or witnessed anything.

After she was dead, White stripped Gay naked, but told authorities he did not remember if he acted out his necrophantasy and had sex with her corpse.…

Freedom, PA — Last month we reported on Thomas Grant, the man who shot an 9-year-old relative at a Halloween party because he thought the costumed girl was a skunk. Today it is being reported that Grant will be headed to trial after he waived his preliminary hearing.

New Sewickley Police Chief Ronald Leindecker said the girl was at a Halloween party wearing a black costume and a black hat equipped with white tassel or feather. At around 8:30 that evening, the girl strayed away from the two to three dozen guests at the home and hid on the edge of a hill near the home.

Around that same time, 24-year-old Thomas Grant says his mother told him she heard there was a skunk in the yard. So Grant picked up a shotgun and fired at what he thought was a rather large skunk, striking his 9-year-old cousin in the shoulder, arm, back and neck.

She was flown to a children’s hospital in critical condition, but is now recovering and reportedly doing well.…

ATHENS, GA – A 21-year-old woman in Georgia has been arrested and charged with murder after stabbing her newborn to death hours after giving birth.

Police say that on Thursday, Cassandra Elyse Norwood gave birth inside a home she shared with her parents and other family members. No one in the home was even aware Norwood had the baby until a family member discovered the newborn’s corpse.

Police were called and the resulting investigation would reveal that hours after giving birth to the boy, Norwood stabbed her baby to death. No word on why she chose this particular route instead of the handful of others that did not involve stabbing a baby to death, or if she suffers from any type of mental illness.

Norwood is currently under guard in the hospital where she’s being treated for blood loss from giving birth. Once she’s given a clean bill of health, she is expected to be transported to jail.

If I had any emotions at all, I could probably get a bit depressed dwelling on stories like this.…

Salinas, CA — Police have charged a 12-year-old boy with cruelty to animals after he hanged a dog by its collar because he wanted to see the dog die.

Last Friday, police revived a 911 call from someone who hung up before explaining why they were calling. All they could make out was a female saying “he’s hurting the dog” before hanging up.

When police arrived at the apartment, they learned that the caller was a 19-year-old girl whose little brother had been trying to hurt one of their dogs. he began beating her while she was on the phone with 911, so she hung up and left the apartment with one of their other dogs.

The apartment was locked and the boy was not answering he door, so police used a pass key to gain entry. Once inside, police found a dead 12-pound terrier-mix hanging from its collar on the boy’s bedroom doorknob. The 12-year-old eventually emerged from his room and immediately admitted to police that he was the one responsible, telling them,“I was mad at the dog so I killed it.”

Police say he showed no remorse for killing the dog, adding that there didn’t seem to be any motive aside from the boy being angry at the dog and wanting to see the dog die.…

BARTOW, FL — A couple of cell phone store employees in Florida have gotten themselves into a bit of trouble after they stole a female customer’s personal photos off her phone and then shared them.

The unidentified woman came to the Cellular Sales of Knoxville store to purchase a new phone. Joshua Stuart, 24, told the woman that he would transfer all of her data from her old phone to the new one she just bought. While Joshua delivered on this promise of data transfer, he also kept some nude photos of the woman he found on her old phone. No idea what the photos were, but they were good enough to share with fellow employee, 26-year-old Gregory Lampert.

Their activities may have gone unnoticed had Joshua and Gregory not decided to show their find to another customer in the store. Unfortunately for the pair, this customer recognized the woman in the pics and immediately informed her that she was pretty popular over at the cell phone store and her private pics may have become wanking material for two of the store’s employees.…

Naperville, Ill — A woman in Illinois has been charged with two counts of murder after she stabbed two children to death because voices told her it was the only way to save their souls.

I’ve collected the following details from a few news articles, but from what I can gather, 40-year-old Elzbieta Plackowska was babysitting 5-year-old Olivia Dworakowski at her home, along with her her 8-year-old son, Justin Plackowska. At some point on Tuesday, Plackowska packed up the children and drove to a nearby church before driving to Olivia’s home. During this time, she argued on the phone with her husband because she had recently lost her father and wanted to return to her native Poland, but her husband wanted to stay here.

On top of all that, according to Plackowska, she was hearing demonic voices that were informing her that the children’s souls were in peril and that the only way to save them would be to volunteer at a nearby homeless shelter stab the children to death. Instead of disobeying the demonic voices, she stabbed Justin and Olivia to death, along with two dogs.…

RANCHO CUCAMONGA, CA — A former Westminster police detective has killed himself just hours before he was to be sentenced after being found guilty of raping a 24-year-old woman he abducted from a mall.

Back in 2010, the victim was leaving her cocktail waitress job at Dave & Buster’s in the Ontario Mills Mall, when 33-year-old Anthony Nicholas Orban forced her at gunpoint to drive to a strip mall in Fontana. There he proceeded to beat and sexually assault the woman for more than an hour. Luckily, she was able to escape out of an unlocked door of her SUV and Orban fled the scene.

It didn’t take police long to identify Orban as a suspect as his dumbass left his registered service revolver in the victim’s vehicle. He was arrested, charged, and kicked off the force. He pleaded not guilty and insulted a jury’s intelligence by claiming  he was insane at the time of the attack.

He said that a dose of the drug Zoloft had triggered hallucinations and suicidal and homicidal fantasies days before the rape and that since he does not recall committing the crime, he should not be held accountable for his actions.…

STATEN ISLAND, NY — I’m just getting back from vacation and behind on the news, so I’m just going to post some stories I found interesting, starting with the 15-year-old high school freshman who jumped in front of a train last week because she was tired of being bullied by members of her high school’s football team.

Felicia Garcia, a 15-year-old student at Tottenville High School, was being picked on because of rumors that she slept with multiple members of the football team at a party held after a game. After school administrators heard about the rumors, they met with Garcia and the 17-year-old boy who was singled out as the main instigator.

Reports are that the meeting ended with Garcia running out while shouting at the boy. Her friends say that Garcia normally didn’t let the bullying bother her. She’d already had a tough life with her parents dying when she was young and being bounced between foster homes after running away from her aunt’s home to be with an older man.…

Pastor Beaten To Death With Electric Guitar

October 31, 2012 at 8:49 am by  

FOREST HILL, TX — The pastor for Greater Sweethome Missionary Baptist Church was beaten to death with an electric guitar by a man who drove his car into the church and was later found dead in the back of a police car.

At about 11:15 a.m. Monday, 33-year-old Derrick Birdow drove a car into the side of the church before getting out and assaulting Pastor Danny Kirk. According to a secretary who had locked herself inside an office, Kirk and a church custodian had been scuffling with Birdow inside and outside of the church moments before Birdow beat the pastor to death with a guitar.

Police arrived on the scene and had to use a Taser to subdue Birdow. He was found unresponsive in the back of a patrol car and then later pronounced dead at the hospital.

Birdow’s children may have attended the church, according to his cousin, but there was no known conflict between Birdow and Kirk. Birdow’s brother said that his sibling didn’t know the pastor at all and had become increasingly paranoid in the last week, claiming people were trying to kill him and that someone had stuck a needle in his arm.…

Woodruff, SC – Lacey Denise Lamb, 28 years old and 21-weeks pregnant, was shot dead by a police officer while she was reportedly attempting to run him over with a car.

Officer William T. Knight pulled the vehicle over at about 1:40 PM yesterday on Jamie’s Creek Drive.  The reason for the traffic stop is unclear, but once the car was stopped, the driver, 33-year-old Matthew Drake Simmons, reportedly exited and began running.

Officer Knight gave chase, at which point Lamb, the only passenger, allegedly got behind the wheel and put the car into motion in an attempt to run the officer down, presumably in an effort to allow Simmons to escape.

Knight drew his weapon and fired, lethally wounding her.  Lamb was airlifted to Spartanburg Regional Medical Center, but neither she nor her unborn child survived.

Simmons was arrested and charged with driving under suspension, third or subsequent offense, according to online jail records.  He is currently awaiting a bond hearing.  It’s unclear at this point if he is the father of the deceased fetus.…

Forest Hills, NY – Gilberto Valle, a married 6-year veteran of the New York Police Department, was arrested in Queens yesterday on charges that he was conspiring to kidnap, rape, cook, and eat a number of female acquaintances.

Pretty much all the evidence against the 28-year-old Valle is in the form of e-mails and instant messages which discussed his plans to “kidnap, rape, torture, kill, cook and eat body parts of a number of women,” according to the complaint against the officer.   Though Valle, who works at the 26th Precinct in Manhattan, never actually followed through on any of his plans, the evidence was enough to officially charge him with federal kidnapping conspiracy.

It’s pretty clear that Valle put some serious thought into his plots though.  In one conversation with a co-conspirator, he mentioned that he would like cook someone “over a low heat, keep her alive as long as possible,” according to the complaint, which describes two specific plans.

The first plan allegedly involved a $5,000 kidnap-for-hire in which Valle believed that his customer was interested in raping the woman in question.…

Burglar Sues Homeowner For Shooting Him

October 25, 2012 at 10:20 am by  

Greenbrae, CA – Samuel Cutrufelli, 31, is suing 90-year-old Jay Leone for shooting him.  Never mind the fact that Cutrufelli had just allegedly broken into Leone’s house to rob it, and that he had tied Leone up before rummaging through the home for valuables.  This is America, yo.

Cutrufelli claims in a civil suit that Leone “negligently shot” him, causing him “great bodily injury, and other financial damage, including loss of Mr. Cutrufelli’s home, and also the dissolution of Mr. Cutrufelli’s marriage.”

Judging solely on the details of the civil suit, I’m guessing Cutrufelli doesn’t feel like his career as a thief, meth addict, convicted felon, and insufferable douchebag had anything to do with any of that.

Cutrufelli is currently embroiled in his criminal trial, facing two counts of attempted murder for an incident that occurred in January, leaving both men with gunshot wounds requiring lengthy hospital stays.  If convicted, Cutrufelli faces life in prison.  Read on and you may wind up feeling like that isn’t quite enough.

On January 4th, 11:00 AM, Cutrufelli reportedly kicked Leone’s door down and tied him up at gunpoint, then scoured the house for valuables to steal.…

Winnsboro, LA – Sharmeka Moffitt, the 20-year-old woman who claimed she had been set ablaze by three men in white hoodies, apparently fabricated the whole story, as new evidence suggests she actually set herself on fire.

On Sunday, October 21st, Moffitt called 911 to report what police believed, at the time, to be a racially motivated attack in which three men doused Moffitt with lighter fluid, set her on fire, and then scrawled “KKK”  and an ethnic slur on the side of her car in…ummmm…toothpaste?  At the time, she said she did not know whether the men were black or white.

Moffitt was able to extinguish the flames using a nearby spigot, but had already suffered serious burns on over half her body.  She was taken to LSU Health Sciences Center in Shreveport for treatment.  Several law enforcement agencies, including the FBI, began investigating the incident as a hate crime.

Now, several days after the incident, police have released the fact that Moffitt’s fingerprints were found on both the lighter fluid bottle in question and the lighter used to ignite it, proving, more or less, that she self-immolated. …

Westminster, CO – Police in Colorado have made an arrest in the Jessica Ridgeway murder case and are expected to charge 17-year-old Austin Reed Sigg with her murder and the attempted abduction of a jogger last year.

Sigg lives about a block from Ketner Lake Open Space and about 1½ miles from where Jessica was last seen walking to school on Oct. 5. He was arrested Tuesday night after police received a tip that led them to his home.

The Associated Press is reporting that Sigg’s mother is the one that called police. “I made the phone call, he turned himself in. That’s all I have to say,” she said.

Sigg is expected to be charged with the attempted abduction last year as well as two counts of murder in the first degree, second-degree kidnapping charge, among others. The Ridgeway family were notified of the arrest.

“We notified the Ridgeway family this morning about the arrest and we hope that it will give them some measure of closure,” Chief Birk said, adding that he hoped it provided some comfort to the community.…