Oh, man. At first I was going to have some fun with her post "What's a melester?" "Because 'alot' is a word, right lady?" etc.
But after about the first three or four lines, it just wasn't funny anymore.
After reading her first message in its entirety I was in something akin to a torpor. After shaking myself out of it, I hoped dearly that the lady had spent more time and effort on rearing her four children than she had on learning to string together letters in a way meant to convey thoughts or feelings.
Filled with resolve to force myself through the whole thing, I began again at the beginning.
My brain then did a whargarbl*, and I gave up.
I salute you, Unamused Cat, for being able to correspond with her.
I won't even touch on the sentiment behind her comments to you, I'm still shaking off the whargarbl*