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Thread: Jose Cruz Arrested for Farting on Cop

  1. #1
    Wadi Thooo Wannabe Lizard's Avatar
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    Jose Cruz Arrested for Farting on Cop

    South Charleston, WV - Jose Antonio Cruz, 34, has been arrested and charged with battery after he intentionally farted on an officer while under arrest for suspicion of drunk driving. While he was being fingerprinted...
    ...Cruz moved near Patrolman T.E. Parsons, lifted his leg and passed gas "loudly" on the officer...

    Cruz then waved the air in the direction of Parsons, who was preparing a breath test machine nearby.

    "The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Patrolman Parsons," the complaint says.

    Cruz allegedly failed to give an adequate breath sample because he has asthma, the complaint says. Cruz asked to be taken to a hospital, but allegedly resisted when emergency medical technicians showed up. Police say they struggled to get Cruz handcuffed while he was on a cot.

    The defendant was initially arrested after police observed him driving his Mazda 626 east on U.S. 60 without headlights, the complaint says. Police say Cruz was unsteady on his feet and smelled of alcohol when they pulled him over...
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  3. #2
    Wadi Thooo Wannabe Lizard's Avatar
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    Lizard is not woman, and not a man. She is something you will never understand. ~From the collected works of the great and marvelous Morbid

    It's hard to shoot yourself in the foot when it's in your mouth. ~Stephen Colbert

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  5. #3
    Great Marshal RockRGrl's Avatar
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    Drinking and driving = NOT FUNNY
    Passing gas loudly and pushing the air in the direction of the officer = FUNNY AS HELL..LOL

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    Grand Knight Envy's Avatar
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    gotta love officers with a sense of humor

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    Grand Baron sherrz's Avatar
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    hahahahahahaha what a doof .. it must have been a really nasty one for the cop to actually cite him for it :)

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    Duke crickett's Avatar
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    Talking Ha,Ha,Ha,Ha,Ha,Ha,Ha,Ha,...........

    Quote Originally Posted by sherrz View Post
    hahahahahahaha what a doof .. it must have been a really nasty one for the cop to actually cite him for it :)
    Whewweeeeeeee......Well, if this officer can't take people farting on him....he needs to get the fuck out of West by-gawd-where-in-the-fuck-is-it-Virginia..."cause this is COMPLETELY normal behavior there.....
    an it's purty funny too.......

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    With my all by myself... SoUncool's Avatar
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    This made NATIONAL news. Heard it this morning on the radio...
    YOUR mom.

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    Book Whore Dark Star's Avatar
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    Wow you know....some folks cannot hold a fart.....(fuck I've tried ya wanna talk about a stomachache), this dude probably was so drunk he didn't realize he was being disgusting with his fart. My first husband was a fucking drunk, he farted all the time. Nasty but criminal....hmmmmmm???
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    Great Marquises TheLittleFriend's Avatar
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    Oh come on. It is better than having a gun at your face! Fart is harmless. Jeeze.

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    Are you telling me

    That when I shove my hubbys head under the covers after I let 'em rip that I can get in trouble for that?? Flipping Funny shit!!!!

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  19. #11
    Great President Castille's Avatar
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    This was my favorite news item today. I even called someone this morning to relate it. Man, beer farts can be especially foul too. Now come on, if it's that foul and you can't go anywhere, you're NOT going to fan it in someone else's direction for fun and self preservation? Please! :D

  20. #12
    Meow Baby! Unamused Cat's Avatar
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    Jose Cruz Arrested for Farting on Cop

    It is better than being spit on.

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  22. #13
    Grand Marshal WryBread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hippiepoet View Post
    Wow you know....some folks cannot hold a fart.....(fuck I've tried ya wanna talk about a stomachache), this dude probably was so drunk he didn't realize he was being disgusting with his fart. My first husband was a fucking drunk, he farted all the time. Nasty but criminal....hmmmmmm???
    Hippie, he wafted the odorous gas toward the officer with his hands -- obviously he was trying to insult the guy. This was no blind-drunk-gas-release. You're too kind to the guy.

    Personally, I believe he was lucky not to be charged with gas warfare -- or a potentially lethal weapon since intestinal gas is combustible. If he'd had a bic lighter to flick ...! The entire station might have gone up since this appears to have been a most mighty blast of intestinal parfum.

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    Marshal Etoile's Avatar
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    TSG says the charges were dropped:
    http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive...5081cruz1.html

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    Grand Count nurseronda's Avatar
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    He has been arrested for dealing drugs. Will post a link later.

  26. #16
    Grand Knight Morticia's Avatar
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    I'm thinking if I were a female cop I would remove my tampon and shove it up his ass!!!

    Ohh, sorry!!! You fart and I instinctively plug up the hole.

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  28. #17
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    If he hadn't lifted his leg he probably could have put on an "all innocent" face and not pissed off the cop.
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  29. #18
    Grand Count nurseronda's Avatar
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    Has now been arrested for beating up his thirteen-year-old son.

  30. #19
    Marshal Etoile's Avatar
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    I'm sure he just wanted to "toughen him up" a little. Riiiiight.

  31. #20
    Twilight Junkie!
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    Quote Originally Posted by SoUncool View Post


    This made NATIONAL news. Heard it this morning on the radio...
    National news?? Ahahahahhahahahahaha!! He's going to forever known as "FART BOY""!!!!

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