Did pot contribute to the death of Cheyenne Holmes' 9 month old?

**Jaded** · September 16th, 2008, 12:27 PM

When police opened the door of apartment 2B at 100 Pierce St. Sunday night, they were greeted by the smell of marijuana.

Minutes earlier, a 9-month-old baby girl had been found floating lifeless in the apartment's bathtub. Now authorities are investigating whether drug use may have contributed to the suspected neglect that ended in young Kelis Gilmore's death.

The young girl's mother, 26-year-old Cheyenne Holmes, charged with child endangerment and drug possession, is also being probed by the city's Administration for Children's Services. Law enforcement sources say the agency has previously investigated her children's welfare.

Detectives believe Ms. Holmes had drawn a bath for Kelis, then left the baby unattended.

Kelis' 7-year-old brother discovered her floating in the tub at about 10:30 p.m., according to Kenneth Marks, a neighbor in the Concord building who tried to resuscitate the child. Her young sister was also present in the apartment, and may have been in the bathroom at some point, Marks said.

Early today, police arrested Ms. Holmes on three counts of child endangerment, a misdemeanor that could mean up to a year in jail.

Cops added another charge this afternoon -- fifth-degree criminal possession of a controlled substance, a felony punishable by one to two and a half years in prison if she's convicted at trial.

Though she has not yet been formally charged by prosecutors, an initial police report alleges that Ms. Holmes "did intentionally neglect her three children, one of them subsequently died."

Still, a police source revealed Ms. Holmes has a history with ACS, for a past marijuana incident.

Ms. Holmes has a background that includes misdemeanor arrests dating to 2002 ranging from petit larceny to assault and harassment to possession of stolen property, a law enforcement source said.

In 2005, police arrested her on charges of possessing marijuana and paraphernalia, but that case was subsequently dismissed, the source said.

http://www.silive.com/news/index.ssf...se_eyed_i.html

Myspace? Private....
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm...endid=82512901

**RockRGrl** · September 16th, 2008, 12:59 PM

I think the kids were probably being neglected whether she was stoned outta her mind or straight up sober. In my opinion smoking some pot isn't as dangerous as getting fall down drunk, but the fact that she is exposing her kids to either is not good. Dumb bitch...should have at least waited until she put the kids to bed before she started the partying!

**TheImperialCerealKiller** · September 16th, 2008, 02:31 PM

Why not just put the kids to bed (it was 10:30 pm!)? They should have been sleeping, especially since the 7-year-old, at least, had to go to school the next morning.
Put the kids to bed and smoke your joint, if you must. Not in the apartment either- go out on the damn balcony. No balcony? Well then, you're shit outta luck!
I agree that pot is 'better' than drinking, and it can certainly be enjoyed responsibly. I can't believe that the pot can get her more jail time than the endangering- that's messed up. I guess if you live in an area where you'd go to jail over pot, you probably shouldn't be smoking it if you've got kids. Or you could always move to Canada.

**ImmortalOne** · September 16th, 2008, 06:02 PM

"Bedtime" LOL For a 9-month old? LOL Not in my household. Hell, we are often lucky if we get in bed before 3-4am with my little 12 month old. Then again, that's just my personal belief. I don't agree with enforced bedtimes. *shrug* Works fine for my 15 and 11yr old and has all their lives.

**Silvahalo** · September 17th, 2008, 12:35 AM

Originally Posted by TheImperialCerealKiller

Why not just put the kids to bed (it was 10:30 pm!)? They should have been sleeping, especially since the 7-year-old, at least, had to go to school the next morning.
Put the kids to bed and smoke your joint, if you must. Not in the apartment either- go out on the damn balcony. No balcony? Well then, you're shit outta luck!
I agree that pot is 'better' than drinking, and it can certainly be enjoyed responsibly. I can't believe that the pot can get her more jail time than the endangering- that's messed up. I guess if you live in an area where you'd go to jail over pot, you probably shouldn't be smoking it if you've got kids. Or you could always move to Canada.

I agree with you TICK, (too funny tick), those children should have been in bed and NOT around a drunk-ass bitch! Both of my children are in bed and asleep by 8:30pm...my 1yr. old began going to bed regularly on a schedule since he was 6 months. These dumb*F* could do their "partying" after the kids are safely in bed if they only had a clue in parenting...

**Shadow** · September 17th, 2008, 01:27 AM

TICK, Remember! You can't fight evil with a macaroni duck!!! (I'll be the judge of that!)

~ceisdsgil

Standard Thought Disclaimer:

These are *my* thoughts. IF you do not like them, Tough! Put on your big girl panties and learn to deal with it.

**The Masked Web Avenger** · September 17th, 2008, 02:47 AM

She must be smoking way better pot than me. Who the hell leaves a baby in the tub unattended?

**lilbay** · September 17th, 2008, 09:06 AM

When one becomes a parent Drug use is something that is best stopped.
Sorry but with the threat of jail sitting there every time you go to buy your dope and go to smoke that dope even If you have a sitter or the kids are at Grandma's or at school There is a threat of your ending up taken away from those kids that threat should be enough to make anyone stop getting high Unless of course they are addicted Than they Justify and rationalize their actions.
Someone who does not have a problem with drugs can say to themselves i am now a parent It could cause me to go to prison or in some cases die So i need to not get high anymore.
Just another thing one gives up when they give birth or make a child.

As far as going out on a balcony to smoke her weed even bigger chance of jail time there not to mention her neighbors being subjected to it.
Not to mention the kids in the home alone while she is out there what if they run up and lock her up. Who will care for those kids??
Not to mention what if they are sleep she is out side getting high and something happens to one of those kids She will never hear them.
IF she had to smoke than that means she has a problem and that means she needs treatment
Sure it is just weed but anytime a person has a problem putting their priorities in order this means they are addicted and abusing and that they need help.

Bt the way I am a recovering addict. I had a serious addiction that I learned Quick that I had to stop if i was going to be a Mom.

**TheImperialCerealKiller** · September 17th, 2008, 09:13 AM

Originally Posted by ImmortalOne

"Bedtime" LOL For a 9-month old? LOL Not in my household. Hell, we are often lucky if we get in bed before 3-4am with my little 12 month old. Then again, that's just my personal belief. I don't agree with enforced bedtimes. *shrug* Works fine for my 15 and 11yr old and has all their lives.

Well, not the 9-month-old, necessarily.
But for older kids who have to wake up at 6 or 7 am or whenever, then go to school all day, come home and play, eat dinner, etc, etc- you'd think you wouldn't even need to enforce bedtimes. By 10:30, they've gotta be tired. Or tired enough that you can put 'em in bed and go smoke your spliff.

I like the idea of not enforcing bedtimes. I know a homeschooling family that does it and it works great for them. I tried it with my oldest (age 7) over the summer and discovered that the kid'll stay up easily until 2 am if not told to go to bed. And the next day- oh boy, watch out! Cranky little monster. Yep, definately backfired here. I understand the philosophy though. This chick, though, was just too busy doing her own thing to care, I think.

**Shadow** · September 17th, 2008, 09:14 AM

Originally Posted by lilbay

When one becomes a parent Drug use is something that is best stopped.
Sorry but with the threat of jail sitting there every time you go to buy your dope and go to smoke that dope even If you have a sitter or the kids are at Grandma's or at school There is a threat of your ending up taken away from those kids that threat should be enough to make anyone stop getting high Unless of course they are addicted Than they Justify and rationalize their actions.
Someone who does not have a problem with drugs can say to themselves i am now a parent It could cause me to go to prison or in some cases die So i need to not get high anymore.
Just another thing one gives up when they give birth or make a child.

As far as going out on a balcony to smoke her weed even bigger chance of jail time there not to mention her neighbors being subjected to it.
Not to mention the kids in the home alone while she is out there what if they run up and lock her up. Who will care for those kids??
Not to mention what if they are sleep she is out side getting high and something happens to one of those kids She will never hear them.
IF she had to smoke than that means she has a problem and that means she needs treatment
Sure it is just weed but anytime a person has a problem putting their priorities in order this means they are addicted and abusing and that they need help.

i think i have to disagree. my reason? i've seen lots of parents who smoke weed and they do awesomely taking care of their children. why? because they don't do it when their children are with them. They do it in the privacy of their (garage/smoke room/office). when the children are with grandma/babysitter.. California's laws are more lax about weed than most other states, i think. and just for the record, sometimes weed takes the edge off the last nerve so you can handle your day. coming from someone who has had severe pain and vomiting from surgery, weed helped where nothing else did. granted, my kid is older (grown now), i don't think it's fair that you lump all marijuana users into the same category as habitual drug users.. some of us actually know how to handle our shit.

~ceisdsgil

Standard Thought Disclaimer:
These are *my* thoughts. IF you do not like them, Tough! Put on your big girl panties and learn to deal with it.

**TheImperialCerealKiller** · September 17th, 2008, 10:33 AM

Yeah, I agree with ceisdsgil. I love pot. I hate booze, but love pot. Don't smoke it on a regular basis at all, but I don't think it's any different or worse than having a glass of wine at the end of the day. And no more intoxicating, at least not for me.

On the other hand, people don't go to jail over it here.
When I was caught smoking it outside a few times as a teen, the police would sometimes grind out the joint on the ground, sometimes just tell us to go smoke it elsewhere.
I remember the one time I was caught at home, back before I had kids. I was living with an ex in an apartment where our landlord hated us. The landlord called the cops on us, claiming that we didn't pick up our dog's poop outside(?!) A lie! Anyway, the cops showed up, and we were smoking a rather large spliff. When I opened the door, smoke came pouring out the door at them. They were like "Whoa, smoking a joint?" I shrugged. They're like "You aren't growing it, are you?" I said no. They wanted to come inside and check to see if we had any plants, so they came in, I showed them inside the closets, showed them my small stash of pot and my burning roach. And that was fine. They only care, here, if you're growing it, it seems. But I think that that would get you arrested in some areas of the States, no?

**Jaded** · September 17th, 2008, 10:38 AM

I quit doing just about everything once my children were born. I wanted to be sure that if anything happened to them, I had enough brain cells and wits to take care of them as necessary.

At any rate, putting a 9 month old baby into a bathtub and walking away to do anything, whether it's to smoke pot or just eat a damn sandwich, is just fuckin stupid. Period.

**Shadow** · September 17th, 2008, 10:45 AM

Originally Posted by So Jaded

I quit doing just about everything once my children were born. I wanted to be sure that if anything happened to them, I had enough brain cells and wits to take care of them as necessary.

At any rate, putting a 9 month old baby into a bathtub and walking away to do anything, whether it's to smoke pot or just eat a damn sandwich, is just fuckin stupid. Period.

thank you SJ.. i agree.

~ceisdsgil

Standard Thought Disclaimer:
These are *my* thoughts. IF you do not like them, Tough! Put on your big girl panties and learn to deal with it.

**Silvahalo** · September 17th, 2008, 11:53 AM

Originally Posted by TheImperialCerealKiller

Well, not the 9-month-old, necessarily.
But for older kids who have to wake up at 6 or 7 am or whenever, then go to school all day, come home and play, eat dinner, etc, etc- you'd think you wouldn't even need to enforce bedtimes. By 10:30, they've gotta be tired. Or tired enough that you can put 'em in bed and go smoke your spliff.

I like the idea of not enforcing bedtimes. I know a homeschooling family that does it and it works great for them. I tried it with my oldest (age 7) over the summer and discovered that the kid'll stay up easily until 2 am if not told to go to bed. And the next day- oh boy, watch out! Cranky little monster. Yep, definately backfired here. I understand the philosophy though. This chick, though, was just too busy doing her own thing to care, I think.

Trained in EDU/ChildPsychology, it is a fact and VERY important little ones get their sleep...it makes the world of difference in academic performance and behavior. Research will show that IQ is also directly related in how much a growing child gets in sleep. Besides it does a lot of good for married couples single moms for that matter to get their much need time together w/out the kiddos up at all hours....just FYI :-)

**RockRGrl** · September 17th, 2008, 01:16 PM

Originally Posted by lilbay

When one becomes a parent Drug use is something that is best stopped.
Sorry but with the threat of jail sitting there every time you go to buy your dope and go to smoke that dope even If you have a sitter or the kids are at Grandma's or at school There is a threat of your ending up taken away from those kids that threat should be enough to make anyone stop getting high Unless of course they are addicted Than they Justify and rationalize their actions.
Someone who does not have a problem with drugs can say to themselves i am now a parent It could cause me to go to prison or in some cases die So i need to not get high anymore.
Just another thing one gives up when they give birth or make a child.

As far as going out on a balcony to smoke her weed even bigger chance of jail time there not to mention her neighbors being subjected to it.
Not to mention the kids in the home alone while she is out there what if they run up and lock her up. Who will care for those kids??
Not to mention what if they are sleep she is out side getting high and something happens to one of those kids She will never hear them.
IF she had to smoke than that means she has a problem and that means she needs treatment
Sure it is just weed but anytime a person has a problem putting their priorities in order this means they are addicted and abusing and that they need help.

Bt the way I am a recovering addict. I had a serious addiction that I learned Quick that I had to stop if i was going to be a Mom.

Lilbay here is a story that fits perfect with what you are saying:

http://www.wpri.com/global/story.asp?s=9018304

**crickett** · September 17th, 2008, 01:34 PM

Originally Posted by So Jaded

I quit doing just about everything once my children were born. I wanted to be sure that if anything happened to them, I had enough brain cells and wits to take care of them as necessary.

At any rate, putting a 9 month old baby into a bathtub and walking away to do anything, whether it's to smoke pot or just eat a damn sandwich, is just fuckin stupid. Period.

The point is NOT the pot, IT WAS LEAVING THE BABY! I enjoy a good glass of wine. Always have at bedtime. Have I EVER left an infant in a tub by itself? NEVER!
HAVE ANY OF YOU EVER LEFT AN INFANT IN A TUB BY ITSELF EVEN IF YOU HAD BEEN DRINKING OR SMOKING POT??? E-V-E-R???
I'll bet you have NOT E-V-E-R
I do NOT care about her pot smoking. It's not even an issue. It's her parenting that sucks!
This STUPID FUCKING LOWLIFE CUNT LEFT A 9 MONTH OLD BABY A-L-O-N-E IN A TUB OF WATER!!!!
PRIORITIES! Babys safety BEFORE your fix.
She needs to have her worthless ass sent to prison. Her other children need placed somewhere where they can get the kids to bed before they get fucked up for the night.

**RockRGrl** · September 17th, 2008, 03:12 PM

Originally Posted by crickett

the point is not the pot, it was leaving the baby! I enjoy a good glass of wine. Always have at bedtime. Have i ever left an infant in a tub by itself? Never!
Have any of you ever left an infant in a tub by itself even if you had been drinking or smoking pot??? E-v-e-r???
I'll bet you have not e-v-e-r
i do not care about her pot smoking. It's not even an issue. It's her parenting that sucks!
This stupid fucking lowlife cunt left a 9 month old baby a-l-o-n-e in a tub of water!!!!
Priorities! Babys safety before your fix.
She needs to have her worthless ass sent to prison. Her other children need placed somewhere where they can get the kids to bed before they get fucked up for the night.

amen!!!

**lilbay** · September 17th, 2008, 05:38 PM

Exactly what I was thinking in that story Rocker Girl.
So Jaded and Ceids
I can relate to the medical reasons. After all there is no worries there of jail or being torn away from your kids etc.
Honestly if the kids are older it is I think a lot different as i said If there is no threat of jail.
I see too many parents daily with Mom's and even Mom and dad in jail each day and it is sad. All because Mom and Dad could not stop puffing.

Sorry where I live they still kick out time for weed. So maybe it is different for you ladies and You all may have a grasp but I know and see plenty Mom's who sadly do nothing but weed and do not sadly care for their kids during the time they are smoked up.

I know some think it is justifiable to do what they want and I know some can handle it. What scares me is will it come a time later when the person can not and than things start to crumble but they are too high to ever know?? or too far gone to realize it or give a darn or have the ability to do anything about it?

I mean I can easily sit back and take a extra bit of my meds (I take narcotics for pain from my beating)
and be a happy flying high pup while both kids are in school and even more my kids are 21 and 15 so heck if i never come out the room as long as they know i am alive and there is food in the house they will make their own dinner and be happy.
But is that really how I want to spend my time? or them spend theirs?
No, I like helping with homework, watching tv, and messing with them in the evening, and Thank heavens they still like it too well most the time LOL after all they are men. LOL
Maybe I value that time more now because with the oldest, I left him with a sitter every weekend so I could party with friends when he was younger To be honest I still hate all the shit I missed from his early years. I justified it because I had one heck of a great sitter that I knew loved and would care for him no matter what.
I Never done anything at my house around him.
But heck i slept more recuperating from the partying, i left him with her more while I was out doing it, and later done a month in jail and missed a whole month of his life, all over some bullshit charge that was 13 years old.
So I guess that is why i see things the way I see them. When I got pregnant with the youngest I made up my miond that I would not play games or gamble with the time I had with him.

All i am saying is Who knows where the falling off point is for each person?
More importantly if you have kids is it worth chancing it and seeing if you have a falling off point or where it is or telling yourself it will never happen to me only to have it happen in the end.
Again that is not a question really needing a answer more just me wondering aloud I ramble just look past me i am old.
LOL

I do think it comes down as Cricket so nicely Yelled
It is her Parenting that was a issue but i can not also help to wonder if in fact she did not have issues with getting high would she not maybe done a better job parenting??

**Piper** · September 17th, 2008, 10:29 PM

So I've been watching this thread wondering whether I should comment or not. Well I've never been really good at keeping my mouth shut. So here it goes.

Yes she was negligent in leaving her baby unattended in the bathtub- heck I won't even go pee while my 9-month-old is in the tub. So much can happen in just a few seconds. But at least she was giving the baby a bath so she couldn't have been that horrible of a parent.

Here's where I think I differ from most people reading/commenting: I am really opposed to drugs of any kind. I don't drink, I've never done any drugs what so ever and I don't ever plan on it. My hubby has done enough for both of us for 2 lifetimes. I've lost a boyfriend to heroin and that was hard. I've seen what drugs can do to a person.

BUT the biggest reason I'll never do any drugs is my parents. They were/are hippie-types. I remember them smoking pot right in front of me as a child. Over and over again. And I hated them for it. I resented the fact that we didn't have money for anything but they still managed to buy drugs. I remember being about 7 years old and the Easter Bunny didn't come one year because we didn't have any money, but they still had their pot. My b-day is in August and my mom would take and re-wrap gifts that I got and give them to me for x-mas. That's how poor we were.

I can attest personally to the fact that parents smoking pot=forgetful/neglecting parent. You don't know how many times my parents "forgot" me. I remember my g-ma paid for me to go to camp and my parents forgot to come pick me up- a counselor had to call them and even then they arrived 5 hours late! I don't think there is any better way to make children feel unimportant than to do drugs. Maybe my parents were really bad at balancing the two- I don't know. But I do know that their drug use is something that really has fucked me up pretty good- to this day still.

**Envy** · September 17th, 2008, 11:02 PM

Like Piper, I too debated entering this thread. After seeing everybodies posts i realized that we need a wake up call.

1. There are good pot smokers, some on DD and others we know offline, that can defend the issue of smoking weed.

2. There are bad pot smokers, some recovering or slowly dying, and that can be brought up and defended or attacked when it comes to smoking the bong or roaches.

3. This is an example of a bad parent who couldn't handle her pot or kids.

4. This POS SOB left her 9 month old baby in a bath tub full of water. Need i remind us, KILLING it.

Please pick a number to dial

**TheImperialCerealKiller** · September 17th, 2008, 11:53 PM

Originally Posted by Piper

BUT the biggest reason I'll never do any drugs is my parents. They were/are hippie-types. I remember them smoking pot right in front of me as a child. Over and over again. And I hated them for it. I resented the fact that we didn't have money for anything but they still managed to buy drugs. I remember being about 7 years old and the Easter Bunny didn't come one year because we didn't have any money, but they still had their pot. My b-day is in August and my mom would take and re-wrap gifts that I got and give them to me for x-mas. That's how poor we were.

I can attest personally to the fact that parents smoking pot=forgetful/neglecting parent. You don't know how many times my parents "forgot" me. I remember my g-ma paid for me to go to camp and my parents forgot to come pick me up- a counselor had to call them and even then they arrived 5 hours late! I don't think there is any better way to make children feel unimportant than to do drugs. Maybe my parents were really bad at balancing the two- I don't know. But I do know that their drug use is something that really has fucked me up pretty good- to this day still.

Wow, that is a really really sad story. My husband had a similar childhood, but due to mental illness/alcohol. I never realised that people could get that hooked on pot! You always hear that it's not addictive, but your story certainly proves that it can be indeed.

**lilbay** · September 18th, 2008, 01:55 AM

Piper I have sat and talked with my oldest and he did hold a lot of resentment against me for a a good while due to my not being in recovery for him as i was for his Brother. He was also upset and remembered so much mroe than I ever even thought he picked up on regarding my getting high.

Thankfully though we have had the help of one heck of a great Therapist who has helped me not only deal with my own demons as well as helped us all to communicate.
I hope at some point you too can reach a place that you are at peace with what happened.

**Piper** · September 18th, 2008, 11:19 AM

Lilbay- kudos to you for addressing this issue with your son. My parents are way into denial. Adding to my resentment is the fact that I have a sister 14 years younger and a brother 17 years younger than me- that they didn't totally screw up.

I went to see a psychiatrist 2 times- why only 2 times? Because on the second visit she said, "Let's talk about your relationship with your parents." I left and never came back.

The peace I have has only come to me by being a better, more responsible parent. My parents have their crap together now (at least they appear that way) but I'm a more resilient, self-reliant, stronger person for the stuff I went through. A bit mistrusting and cynical but not too bad for basically raising myself.

Thanks for letting me vent- the check's in the mail. ;)

**lilbay** · September 18th, 2008, 12:39 PM

No problem Hon I wish I could reach over and give you a hug.
Since I can not i will give you this.

**TheLittleFriend** · September 18th, 2008, 01:01 PM

I have nothing against potheads as long as they don't harm themselves and others.....

But...leaving baby in the tub alone while smoking pot? Gee, I hope it was worth. Stupid bitch.