Fredericton, Canada – Daniel Kelly Gould, 31, was sentenced to 10 months behind bars for two sexual assaults which occurred in area parks on May 5th and July 17th.
In the first incident, Gould targeted a sunbather in Odell Park.* The woman, who was lying down with her eyes closed, was alerted to Gould’s presence only when his baby batter found its way into her hair and onto her shoulder; a classic example of what I term “surprise bukkake.”* Gould was able to run off with his waning johnson leading the way, but was subsequently arrested for his endeavors.
Gould’s second reported foray into the wild world of public ejaculation occurred at Wilmot park where he masturbated behind a seated sunbather and doused her hair with a healthy dose of his cock snot.
The semen from the two incidents yielded a match, prompting Gould to plead guilty and accept a total of 10 months in jail where he is likely to have a cell-mate with very crusty locks.
Prosecutor Hillary Drain offered an astute bit of insight into Gould’s actions when she pointed out that “going to a public park and ejaculating on women minding their own business isnít acceptable.”
On another note, I’ve just come to the unfortunate conclusion that this is a world in which I no longer wish to live.…
This article was written by PetePuma for The Dreamin Demon - the Internet's self-appointed buzzkill - and is not allowed to be copied on other sites.
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