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Thread: Fat man just wants to dance.

  1. #1
    Meow Baby! Unamused Cat's Avatar
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    Fat man just wants to dance.

    NEWPORT BEACH – Police are looking for an overweight, unshaven man in his 30s who snuck into two unlocked homes recently to dance for their residents, claiming that it was a requirement of his fraternity's scavenger hunt.

    Around 10 a.m. Sunday, a woman living in the 1700 block of Marguerite Avenue went into her living room and found a man there who said he had to dance for her, said Newport Beach police Sgt. Evan Sailor.

    The woman was alarmed and not sure how she should handle the situation.

    After finishing his dance, the man hugged the woman and put his hand on her butt before leaving, Sailor said.

    On April 12, a similar incident occurred in the 700 block of Begonia Avenue in Corona del Mar, where a man with a matching description told the resident that he was in a fraternity and had to dance for her, police said. He touched her hand before leaving.

    Police believe the man is either a residential burglar or sexual deviant, Sailor said.

    Police ask that anyone with information about similar incidents contact Crime Prevention Specialist Andi Querry at 949-644-3699.

    The man is described as a 5-foot-10, 200-pound, white man with a heavyset build and unshaven face, seen wearing a blue or white T-shirt, shorts, white socks and white tennis shoes.

    http://www.ocregister.com/articles/p...4-woman-sailor

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  3. #2
    Wadi Thooo Wannabe Lizard's Avatar
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    If not for the butt touching, this would be nothin' but funny.

    People...if you don't have a big barky dog, lock your damn doors!
    Lizard is not woman, and not a man. She is something you will never understand. ~From the collected works of the great and marvelous Morbid

    It's hard to shoot yourself in the foot when it's in your mouth. ~Stephen Colbert

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    Pickle Me Jaded Jaded's Avatar
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    Sorry, even with the butt touching, I'm still cracking up. Cause all I can see is Chris Farley doing his Chippendale routine on SNL.
    "Never make a decision when you need to pee."
    --Leonard Cohen (Beautiful Losers)

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    The Picture Guy w8ng4msrgt's Avatar
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    [ame="http://youtube.com/watch?v=9RajNvJ3bCU"]Chris Farley[/ame]

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  9. #5
    Charmed, I'm sure.... Shadow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by So Jaded View Post
    Sorry, even with the butt touching, I'm still cracking up. Cause all I can see is Chris Farley doing his Chippendale routine on SNL.
    I had the same... thought come to mind LOL....

    ~ceisdsgil

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    Buzzkill. Athena's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lizard View Post
    People...if you don't have a big barky dog, lock your damn doors!
    ...lest you be danced at!!! Oh, the horror...

    SJ's right - butt-touching included, this is still fucking HILARIOUS.

    The woman was alarmed and not sure how she should handle the situation.
    You don't say, huh? Personally, I'd start moving furniture out of the way. Maybe he knows how to cha-cha? I'm not wasting a perfectly good dance partner.

    Oh, and 5'10" and 200lbs is TOTALLY not fat. That's "healthy". :D
    "Now that ceaseless exposure has calloused us to the lewd and the vulgar, it is instructive to see what still seems wicked to us. What still slaps the clammy flab of our submissive consciousness hard enough to get our attention?"

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  13. #7
    Wadi Thooo Wannabe Lizard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by So Jaded View Post
    Cause all I can see is Chris Farley doing his Chippendale routine on SNL.
    God, I still hate it that he's dead. That's one of the funniest SNL skits ever, and he did some really funny shit. The motivational speaker living in a van down by the river....
    Lizard is not woman, and not a man. She is something you will never understand. ~From the collected works of the great and marvelous Morbid

    It's hard to shoot yourself in the foot when it's in your mouth. ~Stephen Colbert

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    Pickle Me Jaded Jaded's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Athena View Post
    ...lest you be danced at!!! Oh, the horror...

    SJ's right - butt-touching included, this is still fucking HILARIOUS.



    You don't say, huh? Personally, I'd start moving furniture out of the way. Maybe he knows how to cha-cha? I'm not wasting a perfectly good dance partner.
    I know, huh? It's so hard to get a guy to dance these days. :D
    "Never make a decision when you need to pee."
    --Leonard Cohen (Beautiful Losers)

  16. #9
    Meow Baby! Unamused Cat's Avatar
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    I love that SNL skit. Farley rocked.

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  18. #10
    With my all by myself... SoUncool's Avatar
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    I seriously don't know how the "judges" in the skit could keep a freakin' straight face...!
    YOUR mom.

  19. #11
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    This guy was in my room!! A half dressed dude was doing a wiggle at the foot of the bed!!!!!

    Then I turned on the light and discovered it was just my hubby trying to step over the dog in the dark.
    Talk about disappointing... *sigh*
    Want to see what you've missed on D'D?
    Click "New Posts" (below the Front Page tab above) to see posts you haven't read.
    Click "Mark Forums Read" on that page to clear the list.

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  21. #12
    Pickle Me Jaded Jaded's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dakota_Valkyrie View Post
    This guy was in my room!! A half dressed dude was doing a wiggle at the foot of the bed!!!!!

    Then I turned on the light and discovered it was just my hubby trying to step over the dog in the dark.
    Talk about disappointing... *sigh*
    OMG.....you fuckin kill me!!
    Be my internet girlfriend and have my internet babies...k?
    I'm gonna be laughing about that for days.
    "Never make a decision when you need to pee."
    --Leonard Cohen (Beautiful Losers)

  22. #13
    Charmed, I'm sure.... Shadow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dakota_Valkyrie View Post
    This guy was in my room!! A half dressed dude was doing a wiggle at the foot of the bed!!!!!

    Then I turned on the light and discovered it was just my hubby trying to step over the dog in the dark.
    Talk about disappointing... *sigh*
    Damn Dakota.. you have such a way with words.. I'm still chuckling..


    ~ceisdsgil

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