Trinity, TX – Special things come in threes, or “trinities,” we all know that.* Think about it; the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost; ménage à trois; The Bee Gees; the number of penetrable holes in a…bowling bowl.* The list is long, and it now continues with the number of people caught this year jamming crystal meth up their twats…in Trinity, TX, for Christ’s sake!
Karen Hale, 22, the reigning holder of Texas’s coveted “Most Asymmetrical Face With An Impossibly High Forehead” award, was arrested on May 9th after police acted on a tip about alleged drug activity and pulled over a vehicle containing Hale, 30-year-old Charles Alexander, needles, spoons and other drug paraphernalia.* The contents of the car, including the human ones, were detained by Trinity Police Chief Steven Jones.
Officer Jones informed the two detainees that they would be probed somewhat extensively once they were booked.* Hale has apparently never heard of a body cavity search, however, since she was caught on video surveillance cameras removing a plastic bag from her bra, and placing it inside her vagina or, as some of us “in the know” call it, her “prison wallet.”
Now, Hale and Alexander were already facing charges of misdemeanor possession of drug paraphernalia, but Hale’s disappearing act afforded her a secondary charge of felony delivery of a controlled substance.* If she had made it into the pokey with the crystal meth, she would have been slapped with a third charge for bringing drugs into a jail.* And that, fellow Demonites, would have been a trinity of charges.* So…effing…close!…

This article is from The Dreamin' Demon, the Internet's self-appointed buzzkill.


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