Barnard Cato, AKA Sharticus, Flees DUI Accident To Avoid Soiling Himself.

**malq** · April 29th, 2012, 06:23 AM

When you gotta go, you gotta go.
This was Barnard Cato's excuse for a quick exit after accidentally and unknowingly smashing his vehicle into another one while drinky. Anytime you put a scratch in your beater car, it's much to the chagrin of the friend you borrowed the car from, at least it is in my case. It's really the shit's when you fail to drive away without getting caught. To add insult to injury, Mr Cato took out the local news stand as if he knew he was going to be on the front page from the wreck he claims he does not know he was just in.
The cops followed his scent and found Cato a few minutes later in of course, Walmart.
Ready?
“I didn’t realize I hit somebody. (I) pulled into the next stop ... I had the runs, I had to go" Cato said, according to an arrest report The police noticed the same thing they write in every DUI report The 29-year-old suspect had a "strong odor of alcohol emanating from his breath and clothing" and his eyes were "bloodshot and watery," There is no mention of the buttjuice filling his boots, which was his sole reason for leaving the scene of the accident that he did not know he caused.

My guess is he clenched his buttocks untill they were done booking him for his shiny newcharges of DUI, hit and run and leaving the scene of an accident involving injury. Charges are pending on possession of a shart.