Colorado Springs, CO — Kevin Gaylor, 24, found himself in an unenviable position early Wednesday morning after allegedly phoning in a false burglary report to cover up his infidelity. Gaylor apparently called 911 just after 3:00 that morning to report that someone was trying to knock down his front door. What’s more, he told police the alleged burglar was armed. Five officers were dispatched to his home, lights and sirens blaring. They immediately made contact with said burglar and detained her for questioning. It was right about then that the proverbial shit hit the fan… Seems Mr. Gaylor recently met this woman on Craigslist and invited her to his home. Unfortunately, the douche’s live-in girlfriend unexpectedly appeared, wrecking his planned rendezvous. When the “other woman” arrived and knocked on the door, Gaylor panicked and called the police in order to convince his girlfriend that the strange woman knocking on their door was a burglar and not his booty call. I have to assume this man is extremely good looking, somewhat rich, or very well-hung…I’d hate to think these ladies were attracted to him for his intelligence. When all was said and done, the unarmed Craigslist chick was released. And if she had even an ounce of brain matter boppin’ around inside her brain space, she would have immediately returned home and headed straight for*dontdatehimgirl.com. But, considering she drove three hours from Denver to hook up with a dude off of Craigslist at 3:00 in the a.m., something tells me she may be lacking. Gaylor was cited with misdemeanor false reporting. No word yet on whether the girlfriend allowed him to keep his testicles. Note: I have seen his name listed as both Keith and Kevin. Because the police blotter lists him as Kevin, that’s what I went with. Many thanks, Alan!
This article is from The Dreamin' Demon, the Internet's self-appointed buzzkill.


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