Will it surprise you to know this is an intro...

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 03:17 AM

hi. since joining, i have more or less stuck to the main page and the reality bites area. i just spent some time reading the past introductions. i am now even more suspicious of humanity.

here are some relevant facts about me...

- i live in the mountainous part of indiana.
- it is the middle of the night and i am eating a peanut butter and banana sandwich.
- i am an engineer by education, work for a company in europe, and travel a lot.
- criminals suck. unless its me and the crime is speeding. then the laws suck.
- whenever my seven year-old daughter asks me what is in something she is eating, i always answer "weasel." she has heard this hundreds of times and still asks. it concerns me.
- when typing a child's age, i can never remember if the hyphen goes between the age and "year" or "year" and "old" - and yet i never bother to look it up.
- i do not yet understand reputation points, but have received some. if you gave some to me... thank you.
- i think that "not-florida" should be a tag.
- i like to run to clear my head. running keeps me from being an asshole. ...or it keeps me from thinking i'm an asshole. i'll never know which.
- carolinablue friend-requested me right off. very nice, that cb.
- diet coke is the perfect beverage. ...and makes a fine hair gel.

other than that, it is worth noting that some stories prompt me to write impassioned and possibly combative dissertations and others make me say "fuckin' humans. oh well" and write some bullshit comment that i - and probably *only* i - think is funny. i cannot predict which reaction will occur. it is kinda random. if you are on the receiving end of a dissertation or attack, damn the timing.

anyway... dd is cool. kudos.

**Tundratot** · March 31st, 2011, 03:33 AM

Welcome to the D'D. I respond to my children's questions about what we might be having for dinner, things like ground glass, snail shells, grass, rusty nails, and whatever other horrible things I can imagine. This used to be a great deal of fun for them. Now they argue about it. I hate that question.

**tmdgirl** · March 31st, 2011, 05:19 AM

Welcome

**MC30** · March 31st, 2011, 08:03 AM

**Jaded** · March 31st, 2011, 08:17 AM

Great intro! Welcome to the forums, kniption. Many thanks for your participation up front, appreciate it. ;)

**cubby** · March 31st, 2011, 09:10 AM

**Countess Olenska** · March 31st, 2011, 09:25 AM

I tell my kids I'm going to sell them to the gypsies.

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 09:57 AM

yours and tundratot's kid interactions are great. the advantage of telling them that you are going to sell them to the gypsies is that, if you ever really do, they won't be surprised. hello to you both.

hi back also to tmdgirl, mommacrazy30 (whose video link i like - paralyzer is still a fave, though), jaded (whose writing up front is excellent and comments hysterical), and cubby (who, if the photo is real, is a really cute cat).

i also noticed kitty and hellsbells stopped by. greetings. hellsbells... you're one hard workin' summabitch when it comes to presenting stories. im. pressive.

**biteme** · March 31st, 2011, 11:58 AM

welcome

**brokenandtwisted** · March 31st, 2011, 12:04 PM

@kniption, @carolinablue is a total friend whore and she'll steal your kidneys when you're sleeping. Be careful.

@Countess Olenska You should just say broken. The thought will scare them more than gypsies.

**walkingeagle** · March 31st, 2011, 01:21 PM

I can't say I've kept up with every comment on the FP, but I have seen you out there and I'm seeing a few of your posts on this side as well.

**Nell** · March 31st, 2011, 01:30 PM

Welcome!

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 04:01 PM

hello @biteme and @Mare . @brokenandtwisted ... your cautious words about @carolinablue are appreciated and i will be sleeping with one eye open. @walkingeagle and @Nell - you seem voices of reason in the forums. greetings all.

this will be a test if i have got mentions figured out...

**Kitty** · March 31st, 2011, 04:18 PM

Originally Posted by kniption

hello @biteme and @Mare . @brokenandtwisted ... your cautious words about @carolinablue are appreciated and i will be sleeping with one eye open. @walkingeagle and @Nell - you seem voices of reason in the forums. greetings all.

this will be a test if i have got mentions figured out...

It looks like you got it right =D

**walkingeagle** · March 31st, 2011, 05:14 PM

Originally Posted by kniption

hello @biteme and @Mare . @brokenandtwisted ... your cautious words about @carolinablue are appreciated and i will be sleeping with one eye open. @walkingeagle and @Nell - you seem voices of reason in the forums. greetings all.

this will be a test if i have got mentions figured out...

I'm going to lose my place in the voice of reason here, because CB, is great people! She is as nutty as the rest of us!

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 05:26 PM

i took @brokenandtwisted 's warning as goodnatured. ...so i believe your voice of reason is still in good standing. ...oh, and "hi" to (properly mentioned) @Kitty.

**carolinablue** · March 31st, 2011, 05:41 PM

Muahahaha! I'll getcha shoes and name a cat after you! Then I can say, "that damn kniption peed in the corner again"! Ironically, of course.

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 05:43 PM

oh *that's* funny, @carolinablue!

**Rawrehz** · March 31st, 2011, 06:07 PM

Hi and welcome.... although I think I missed the whole 'not-florida' tag concept :/
I am blonde and I am from Florida so maybe that's why ...

anywhoooo~ hiya!

**Obsolete** · March 31st, 2011, 06:14 PM

Show us your tits!

(one of these days that's going to pay off)

**Coyote** · March 31st, 2011, 07:26 PM

Welcome to the Den kniption!

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 09:55 PM

hi @Rawrehz. the proposal of a "not-florida" tag is because your neighbors - well... some of them, anyway - seem to be taking bad behavior to astonishing depths. ...almost to the point of being unfair to the scumbags in the other 49. i'll read a post and think "that's abominable" and then see it is from florida and basically shrug it off. "not-florida" is just an attempt to level the playing field. ;)

hello also @Obsolete. i admire your hopefulness. sorry to disappoint as i generally get no beads at mardi gras.

thank you for the welcome to the den, @Coyote. greetings also to @OMalley, @Gidget, and @totallytoddler who i see stopped by.

**totallytoddler** · March 31st, 2011, 10:05 PM

Greetings back to you @kniption and Welcome!

That's me by the way.

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 10:14 PM

oh my. ...and the word on the street is that you had a birthday today, @totallytoddler. 28... happy birthday, tt!

**totallytoddler** · March 31st, 2011, 10:18 PM

Originally Posted by kniption

oh my. ...and the word on the street is that you had a birthday today, @totallytoddler. 28...

Yes, I had a birthday today. And I confess that's really not me...but I am hot and my ass DOES look like that! Millions of squats and lunges. :)

**kniption** · March 31st, 2011, 11:07 PM

i knew that it was a dead ringer, @totallytoddler!

...and i can see that you replied as i was editing the missing birthday wish into my last post. so here it is again: happy birthday, tt. hope it was a good one!

**OMalley** · March 31st, 2011, 11:29 PM

This reminds me of Romper Room...someone can SEE me! Said my name!

Oh, ummmm...Hi.

**claddaghgirl** · March 31st, 2011, 11:48 PM

Welcome knipition. Your name brings me back to the 80s (best time of my life) and the numerous times I said to friends "my parents are going to have a kniption fit". And they had many a kniption fit after finding out some of the things I did.

You have met the best members of DD...well, a few are yet to crawl out from their lairs and when they do I'm sure they will introduce themselves to you.

Enjoy the insanity.

**kniption** · April 1st, 2011, 12:20 AM

funny, @OMalley. haven't thought about romper room in a while. all i need to know i learned in romper room, i suppose. glad you stopped back by.

i am also a product of the 80s, @claddaghgirl. ...and, to this day, i am not aware of a better phrase for that demented swirly tantrumish state that parents got/get themselves into while reprimanding a child for the very same shit they pulled at that same age.