Disturbingly Shitty Ads

[DamagedGoods]

Do you ever find yourself watching something, only to suddenly wonder htf you came across it in the first place?

Yeah, that's gonna be my story from now on...

Of course, I really DON'T recall how I first came upon this... probably a thread somewhere...

Prepare yourself... it's about to get messy... and by messy I mean a cavalcade of bad acting, and really really horrible "banter"...



If you watched it... you can clearly see that the ad starts out bad and goes downhill fast from there.

1. I've listened to the first statement by the chick in the middle about 10 times, and I'm still not entirely sure what she's trying to say. It sounds like, "Hey! I look at car accident lawyer!" or perhaps, " Hey! I fucked that car accident lawyer!" (You can hear it as the lawyers finishes reading out her phone#)

2. "Slow down cowgirl, don't click so fast, you're not a man!" If anyone in my household told me to stop channel surfing because she wanted to check out the poorly constructed ad of a personal injury lawyer, said person would be promptly ejected from both my house, and my life. Also, yes, I am not a man, but I can sure as fuck appreciate channel surfing to avoid ads, does this make me somehow transgender?

3. "But is she going to be as tough as a man?"

4. "Well we're tough enough to give birth!" All hail the mighty Vajayjay! Babies come from there!

It looks like they're hanging out in a doctor's waiting room... and I don't know about you guys, but I'm fixated on that fugly blanket. Why is it there? Why does it look like it's trying to escape under the loveseat?

I'd lost the link to the original video, and, wanting to share the atrocity with my hosuemates, I went to youtube and searched for it... much to my horror I discovered that there are more *shudder*

Next up:



1. "... it was really nice to have a woman lawyer who understood my problems..." Because, usually women lawyers are incompetent boobs, but this one's awright!

2. "Yeah but did she know her stuff?" No... she somehow passed the bar exam without knowing how to actually practise law...

I think the next one is even more sexist and corny!



Fuck it, I'm not doing any quotes for this one... I'm just going to roll my eyes dramatically and move on...



In this thought provoking episode, we learn that male lawyers are all tennis playing, uncaring douchebags... which might be true, but I'm pretty sure most personal injury lawyers would put effort into your case, they tend to make more money that way.

I find it amusing that in this ad, the actual lawyer talks, and is better in front of the camera than the actresses.

Holy fuck do I hate the "women bantering in an intimate setting" type ads... but this one takes the cake I think.

Now, feel free to add your own...

[Dakota Valkyrie]

Our area had a steakhouse (which we went to frequently and a daughter worked at) that had the WORST stupid ads. "Smoky" did the ads himself. Probably wrote them too. He was quite the character but made every meal an "experience". He sold the business and the new owners drove it into the ground. Smoky died in a gully in AZ a few years back.

"Cannibals"?


You can see more of them here: http://www.youtube.com/user/oldsmokys

[DamagedGoods]

Holy Hairy Bouncing Manboobs DV... that was... an experience....

[Alf]

I just sat here and watched them all, DV. I liked the outtakes they included in the "Meateaters" ad.

--Al

[DSC]

OMG... those are bad.

That's what I want, a feminist lawyer that will piss off a male judge.

And smoky's.... oh my. don't even know what to say.

Chicago has Eagle Insurance's long running commercials that are sooo bad they're unforgettable and successful. There's a wiki article about it:

Eagle Insurance is a vehicle insurance agency based in Chicago, Illinois, which has been serving residents of the metropolitan area since 1961. It is best known for its unusual, low-budget television commercials featuring the egg-laying “Eagle Man,” an actor in a bald eagle costume.

These commercials were such a 'success' that Lincoln insurance had to get in on it too




And of course can't forget Victory Auto Wreckers which still runs this commercial: