A Swedish woman with a fetish for inanimate objects has revealed she's been married to the Berlin Wall for 29 years.
Eija-Riitta Berliner-Mauer, 54, whose surname means Berlin Wall in German, wed the concrete structure in 1979, reports the Daily Telegraph.
Mrs Berliner-Mauer, who has been diagnosed with a condition called Objectum-Sexuality, claimed she fell in love with the wall when she first saw it on TV as a child.
She began collecting "his" pictures and saving up for visits. On her sixth trip in 1979 they tied the knot before a handful of guests.
While she remains a virgin with humans, she insists she had a full, loving relationship with the wall.
Mrs Berliner-Mauer, who lives in Liden, northern Sweden, said: "I find long, slim things with horizontal lines very sexy.
"The Great Wall of China's attractive, but he's too thick - my husband is sexier."
While the rest of mankind rejoiced when the Berlin Wall was largely torn down in 1989, its "wife" was horrified.
She's never been back and now has only model to remind her of "his" former glory.
Mrs Berliner-Mauer, who has shifted her affections to a nearby garden fence, said: "What they did was awful. They mutilated my husband."