moonlilly1981

You have a home her. You fit in here and you need to get out of this depression mode and date Steve, Geve love a second chance. It is why the world turns not money love. Love your children love to work love to play Love. Pure and simple. Stop being afraid because of 1 jerkfanugin.

you fit in here sweetcheeks. i don't fit in with the school moms either. i could give a rats ass about new clothes and who said what to whom. you are going through a very stressful situation. no reason to just 'snap out of it'. it will come with time. focus on you and your kids. and fuck the rest of it. when you are ready you will know.
keep your chin up honey. shit happens to the best of us. ;)

^^^Momma has is right. You don't won't always fit the mold. I'm not a mommy group girl, I like comfy clothes and I could give a shit what people think of me.

Amen to what everyone else said. You're not the only mom that feels that way when you drop the kiddos off. I have even purposefully stayed in the car to avoid the bitchiness that stakes out the front door of the school. When I do talk to them, all I can think about is how much I want to get away from them and their petty, gossipy bullshit. So, I say, find friends that accept you as you are--even if it means here on the Demon--and open your heart when you are ready. If Steve is the right guy, he'll tread softly.

Hell, I don't fit in with the school mommy crowd either. Not sure why & don't give a shit, either (usually). Fuck 'em, I say.

Moon -- I never fit in ANYWHERE EVER, even in my own family. Oh, I fake it when I have to but only with my family, and they still don't accept me -- it's all an act for a few hours. (The last time I saw my niece she told me she had seen the skirt I had on but her s/o wouldn't let her buy it because it looked like something a "hippie" would wear -- so I don't buy my clothes at Ann Taylor Loft or whatever .. .. .. I also don't wear my clothes a size too small.)

Before I worked in health care for 20+ years, I worked in construction mgmt for around 10 years. They only way to get any respect was to learn how to hold my own. Honestly, health care in the area where I live/used to work (Central VA), well, I just never fit in. Ever. Hubs either since he's not from here (and ex-Air Force). We don't drive the right car, we don't shop at the right stores, the list goes on and on. School events were the worst experience ever. But we went and finally just accepted that the other parents were always going to ignore and snub us.

But we did it for our boys, and they did appreciate it and they did notice. We tried, though; gave it our best shot. We decided those parents weren't good enough for us and let it go. But it did take a few years to finally let it go. When I did have to interact with these bitches, I just tried to be pleasant and sort of in a "rush". And there's always the fake cell phone (don't forget "vibrate") and politely excuse yourself.

Good luck. Maybe you should give Steve a shot, as a friend for a while. Make that clear then see how it goes after that (since you do have to work with him and all). If you're comfortable with that since you're the one who has to see him all the time (and work for his dad).

Good luck. I think you'll be having more "good" days than bad days soon. You're a good person, Moon. I feel it. I would be proud to be your mom.

~~S

Feh on fitting in. Why would you want to?
As for the love/relationshit stuff, right now you need to love YOU before you can love anyone else.
So straighten those shoulders, lift your head up high, and be who you are, not what you think others expect you to be. And if right now you are a woman into self-pity, then that's who you are. Nothing to be ashamed of, and you WILL come out of that IF that's where you are.

Originally Posted by Amazon

Feh on fitting in. Why would you want to?
As for the love/relationshit stuff, right now you need to love YOU before you can love anyone else.
So straighten those shoulders, lift your head up high, and be who you are, not what you think others expect you to be. And if right now you are a woman into self-pity, then that's who you are. Nothing to be ashamed of, and you WILL come out of that IF that's where you are.

What Amazon said, just be you, Moon. Everything will then all fall in to place in time. It's amazing when you finally realize how much energy was wasted on "fitting in". You're awesome just as you are. Take stock sometime -- not right now but some time. Read some of you past blogs and look how far you have come. Each and every one of us has had a pity party; it's a rule or something.

{S}

Oh yeah, pity parties ARE indeed allowed. Just don't wallow in them.
I have come to the conclusion that everyone is happier when they are miserable and since I STRIVE to be different, I make sure no one ever pities me like that again. When I have my own pity party, it is a party of one. Of course, the medication does help that a bit.

I'm not depressed. Just venting. Not a pity party. For the most part i am happy with life. Yeah it has its bumps its ups and downs.

Steve is awsome. We have spent some time together as friends. Just having fun and enjoying each other's company.

Ridiculous. People are saying you fit in HERE? How do you like THAT for some bullshit coddling and moot pats on the back. Fit in here. Good christ.

Yo- biggest thing? I don't know how many times I keep hearing women say "he's been my friend since (insert timeframe here)" as if it justifies some rebound fuck. All that is fine...along with the dipshit who is "so sweet" and lets your kids play with socket wrenches and shit.

Biggest thing is this- you wanna fuck like mad, do it. But stop letting your kids be around every boyfriend and meet them, and let them be these nice guys to the kids and shit. I get tired of hearing that shit from women. "He's so nice to the kids".

Stop having them AROUND the kids, man. I did it once. Mandy. I had her around the girls. WE were in a long term relationship. Figured it was ok. She was good with them. Kids miss her to THIS DAY. They bonded. You know what? They got hurt when we broke up. They got caught up in the hurt too.

Seriously. Don't have your kids around relationships anymore. They're not litmus tests to see if said dude is going to be nice or not...or worth it or not...wait a long time before that shit comes into play.

But you don't fit in, moon, because that's just the way you are. Some of us DON'T fit it. It's just the way it is.

You may never. It's your cross to bear....

I agree about keeping the kids out of it. I do not agree that she doesn't fit in here or anywhere else for that matter.

You don't have to be a cookie cutter to feel comfortable and frankly she would be boring if she were.

I never fit in with the suburban sports moms. All they wanted to do was sit in the stands and talk about themselves rather than watch their kids play. I always hung out on the fence with the dads who enjoyed the games. Don't even worry about those shallow bitches. Bah!

whoa whoa whoa lieman stop the over reaction train. Yes friends nothing more. Steve is nice to look at but Im not interested. Yeah its cute to see in interact with my kid. But I was more pointing out how his values are different then most peoples. Mike and I have been friends since we were eleven years old. We both came from abusive homes. We are both now epic relationship failures. That dosnt mean im going to date either one of them.

The whole point of this blog was to vent about how im sick of never fitting in anywhere. I can't seem to find my little corner of the world where I belong. I had all day saturday by myself. I could have dialed a number or two and found me some rebound un-feeling sex but I didnt. I met a friend for breakfast and got a pedicure. I'm not nearly as shallow and empty as I appear to be.

If and when I decide to date again that person isnt meeting my kids unless it gets extreamly serious. Fucking isnt serious enough to meet my kids. Ive made that mistake twice now and it wont happen again.

I got misty eyed reading this. I guess quite a few of us here don't fit in "most" normal circumstances.
You SHOULD enjoy spending time with whomever you enjoy spending time with without having to worry about being pressured for a "relationship". It is a fine line when someone who is pursueing you decides friends is really what you meant and starts a relationship elsewhere. So be careful about becoming dependant of the attentions or you may feel you don't fit in there either.
It sounds like you have some great friends and lots going for you. I don't think you're depressed I think your normal and that you're just healing. A wound itches as it heals and our minds bug us as our hearts heal too.
I think you are going to be just fine and that you will love again when you are ready so vent away!