Throughout the last few years I have engaged in behavior that begs questions as to why, and even when, when will it spell the end. I have caught myself looking in the mirror, while someone talks to me, or while I am bleeding from my face, and wondering what the fuck I am doing.

But last night, I refrained. I have been making better decisions lately, opting not to fuck a beautiful woman on a hotel room...

I will make this a short blog, because it's going to scroll off the screen in about three hours.

Talked to a friend tonight, about ghosts, and how they last. She told me, she said she still thinks about hers, a lost love seven years later, and is that obsessive, and I said no, that love is sometimes dark and ugly, but love, real love doesn't die, and things that don't die, get decrepit.

I talked to...

Everything is peaceful and serene, and life is like the reflection of mountains against a glassy laketop. The whores are gone for now. I see my children every day now, I am working hard at finishing editing for my webpage, and I have taken a sabbatical from pussy. Things are….calm.

Calm.

I wake up in the mornings now, not in the evenings. I have purged the phonies form my life, almost entirely. I have my ordinary...

Ahhh, it is the time of year again. The trees no longer blossom with life, they twist and writhe upward, leafless, in silent screams toward the sky, hard black shapes in a dark blue horizon, lit only by a cold moon. Even the air is harsh, a stinging bittercold nipping at your neck as you venture out into the night. Homes are dark shapes flanking neighborhood streets, their porches glowing with dancing orange and red hues, as Jack-o-lanterns...

The reflection of Marylin's glistening body is etched across my bloodshot eyes, and they look out the window of an airplane, down below to the bristling lights of Dallas, glowing through the black horizon overlooked by a sliver moon on a hopeless night, and I can still see her dance, can still feel her slinky legs fold over my stomach, can still smell her cigarette breath and her cheap coconut perfume as she kisses...