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Another Bunch Of Random Words Make A Name, Cherries Waffles Tennis Arrested

Whisper

Whisper

#byefelicia
erfzwy.jpg

Cherries Waffles Tennis​
She may have had a brush with the law, but her name makes her sound pretty sweet.

Cherries Waffles Tennis, 19, was arrested
[...]
after allegedly making fraudulent purchases at surf shops in Jupiter, Florida
[...]
Police say Tennis, along with 19-year-old Vincent Mitchell and 22-year-old Paul Miller, purchased a $400 spear gun and GoPro camera with a credit card that ended up being declined.

All three were booked into jail on fraud charges, but Tennis started getting the Internet’s attention on Thursday when her mug shot was posted
[...]
with the caption “Florida Woman’s Name Just Random Assortment Of Words.”

Whatever. Cherries Waffles Tennis is an awesome name, in competition only with “Crystal Metheny” and “Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybob-Bop-Bop” for our favorite Weird News name.
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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/...sted_n_5776980.html?utm_hp_ref=crime&ir=Crime
 
WHY would you do that to your child! See, it made her steal credit cards and buy things she shouldn't have! Poor Girlie!
 
That look was also the look she gave the detectives interrogating her when they asked "Why did you do it?" She gave them that look and said "you read my name, right?"
Who here thinks that the spear gun and GoPro were most likely intended for a homemade porn video... work your minds on that lil' vision of lovely getting all Free Willy on film... Free Willy 5: Mating Season

Best title ever for a story @Whisper
 
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Her mother was just looking at what everyone was eating and what was on tv and thought "good enough":)
 
You guys are killin' me!!!!11!!
  • Tonsillitis “Tonsy” Jackson (boy) – born Nov. 7, 1932
  • Meningitis “Mennie” Jackson (boy)
  • Appendicitis “Pendy” Jackson (girl) – born Dec. 25, 1936
  • Laryngitis Jackson (girl)
  • Peritonitis Jackson (girl)
  • Jakeitis Jackson (girl)
From Nell's link, heaven help them poor chilluns!
 
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Best laugh I had since I sang the minute lube minutemen jingle to my girls. In case you were too young to remember it goes like this. We're the minute lube minute men Trained to lubricate And do it right. We're the Minute lube Minute men. But those ridiculous names are funnier. How do those kids keep a straight face when they have to give their names?
 
Wolf_of_Mars said:
My birth name is pretty jacked-up, but nothing like these kids have.
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I dont say much I have a kid named Heaven
have finished explaining her name years ago
wasnt what we had picked but she almost died and nurses and dr referred to her as a little piece of Heaven and it stuck
my name is kinda common but my mom spelled it really fucked up after my dads bff
Aimee' its actually a mans french name
 
She has a lot of real estate on that face. Perfect for a Wal-Mart. Judging by the stretchmarks on her cheeks, I wonder if her profession is blowing up balloons.
 
joanne mazza said:
Best laugh I had since I sang the minute lube minutemen jingle to my girls. In case you were too young to remember it goes like this. We're the minute lube minute men Trained to lubricate And do it right. We're the Minute lube Minute men. But those ridiculous names are funnier. How do those kids keep a straight face when they have to give their names?
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Welcome. If you haven't done so already, Start a thread in introductions so we can welcome you proper.
 
You get cookies if you do an intro thread, so it's totally worth it. My first name is the male spelling, and that also makes it longer. It's misspelled a lot, too.
 
[QUOT="Chinchillazilla, post: 818556, member: 6091"]Her brother, murderer Blueberries French Toast Racquetball, remains at large.[/QUOTE]
I am In tears!!! I was trying to come up with clever joke about her playing tennis with the waffle and her mouth, but I'm done! That was good...that. was. Good.
 
joanne mazza said:
Best laugh I had since I sang the minute lube minutemen jingle to my girls. In case you were too young to remember it goes like this. We're the minute lube minute men Trained to lubricate And do it right. We're the Minute lube Minute men. But those ridiculous names are funnier. How do those kids keep a straight face when they have to give their names?
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Now I need to find this jingle for my spouse's phone. It's as good as the Juicy Fruit one... "Take a sniff... pull it out...."

Or maybe I'm just disturbed and so hear everything pervertedly.
 
I didn't have a name for my son when he was born and my drunk parents walked over from the neighborhood bar for three days in a role begging me to name him Nicholas. I had no good ideas so I told the nurse Niko. She gave me a fifteen minute lecture on how this is not a dog and I have no business naming him something so stupid, so I let her put Nicholas on his birth certificate.

He hated it. He did not like his name at a very young age. When he was two, he started telling people his name was Blue. So, he was Blue. Then at around four years old, he asked if he could change his name to Nike. I was thrilled. It was close enough to Nicholas and it fit him. When kindergarten came, he went to a private school and the music teacher told him he could not be Nike unless it was a "real" name and on his birth certificate. I photocopied baby name books and sent those along with his amended birth certificate. It means victory. Also, it is not a food or a disease so bonus points for him.
 
Maybe she was adopted from the foster system. Sometimes, they will let a child pick their own new name.
I hope that was the case and her mom isn't a complete moron.
 
I hope they drug tested her mom when Tubby was born, ain't no way someone sober picked out that name, or an adult. Hmm, maybe she has older siblings that picked out her name?

My Mom is Barb (and my father is Ken, no lie) she was named by her sister because her sister loved her new Barbie doll, so her name is Barbara.

I'm also saving this story in case my children ever bitch about their names, I''m sure they'll thank me after reading this.
 
See - now I could look at the blue waffle and be OK. The dismember video - not so much. Does that make me weird?

And just so the thread isn't totally derailed - I have a boy's name. Full on boy's name. Ask @Nell. She knows.....
 
Unusual baby names. Is your child named for something special?

"My hometown"
"My favorite author"
"A precious gemstone"
"A Greek goddess"

...

"Uhhhhh breakfast at IHop?"
 
Whisper said:
I dont say much I have a kid named Heaven
have finished explaining her name years ago
wasnt what we had picked but she almost died and nurses and dr referred to her as a little piece of Heaven and it stuck
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I'm kinda on the hippie side, but I think it's a pretty name. And, her story just seals the deal. :)
 
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