Welcome to the Ninth Circle Lunatic Asylum
! muahahahahahaha...
I am Her Majesty, Queen Carolinablue
, Protector of the Realm
, Collector of Taxes
and Kicker of Asses
. My responsibilites are many
; mostly they consist of making :wait:long, rambling, incoherent posts.
(which have no relation to the topic being discussed.
)
Male or Female<3? I need to know if you will be one of my hoes
, or a man whore
. If you suck up enough you will be promoted to minion
!
Everyone on this site
, except for me
, is either drunk
, depraved
or deranged
. Or all three
.. those are the most fun
.
My most distasteful
responsibility
is to warn you about some of the whack-a-doodles
here.
Morbid is a vile excuse of a sentient being
! He makes a squillion
dollars offa this site, and what does he do
? He disappeared our BLOGS
! He shambles around wearing rags
he picks out of the garbage
; the stench will burn out your nose hairs
He does nothing but booze it up with Jaded
and exposes himself in public
! He carries a magnifying glass...for obvious reasons
. He is currently wanted by the cops for molesting hyenas at the local zoo
. The hyenas are going to sue
.
Jaded isn't much better
, but she IS cuter.
She is as deranged as he is
, but handles it better
. She follows men down the street
, threatening to kiss them
if they don't give her money
. She once jumped on a cop's back
and screeched, "HIYO SILVER, AWAAAY
!" Poor cop ran 2 city blocks before he could scrape her off on a light pole
; now he refuses to leave the station house.
She just got out of the hospital<3; Morbid's reeking sofa
gave her a mutated STD
...the CDC has named it "Morbaidherparrhea"
There is no cure
CbabyRKO is very pretty
and articulate
... It's a trap
! She is an undercover agent for the FBI!
One day she'll find the Bahamian bank
where Morbid the bastard hides his millions
. She is relentless and will track him down
, but only if she can wears a HazMat suit
. She is planning our March on Morbid:devil: protest...she wants to catch him and beat him like a rented mule
till he gives us back our blogs
. Be nice to her or she'll put you under surveillance.
Krystal and Forensic I might as well put them together; they are partners in crime
. They have the onerous job
of giving physicals to new
Marine recruits
It's a HARD job:crack:<---that's vulgar
, inappropriate
and slightly obscene
...and so are they! Some of the guys come back for more
searching...those hoes have the BEST job evah:devil:. They are so devoted to the Corps
, they have volunteered
to go overseas with the troops
! To keep their Marines' morale high
and their morals low.:whistle: They will succeed
because I've never met anyone with lower morals!
rod2pop is my man whore
and works very hard at it
; sometimes I have to discipline him
. Right now he's chained to the wall
in my dungeon for refusing to paint my toenails.
I'll let him out later
and maybe give him a squeak toy
.
The duties of my position call, but before I attend to matters of state I must warn you that most everybody here is slightly unhinged. I am all that stands between you and....THEM!