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Casey MolterSEBASTIAN, FL – Casey Molter, 28, trashed his girlfriend’s car because she told him his dead grandmother would appear in his dreams and sexually assault him with a sex toy.

The incident happened last November, but the details are just now making the rounds.  According to police, they were called to a home shared by Molter and his girlfriend.

Apparently, the two got into a fight the led to Molter taking out his frustrations on his girlfriend’s 1997 Nissan Altima. The damages included a broken passenger side mirror, and deflated tires. There was also a used prophylactic and “love notes” on the hood and windshield.

When asked why he damaged his girlfriend’s car, Molter told the deputy that his girlfriend is a “spiritual person’ and can tell a person about their dreams.” Molter said that his girlfriend told him his dead grandmother was going to appear in his dreams and “commit an unusual sex act to him involving an adult erotic device.”

Molter said that he was unable to get the image of his dead grandmother sexually assaulting him with a sex toy so he took his frustrations out on his girlfriend’s car.…

Jesus BlowobEVERETT, PA – A 14-year-old boy is facing two years in jail after he simulated oral sex from a Jesus statue that, honestly, looked like it was made for something exactly like this.

The teen got himself in trouble after simulating the sex act with a statue that belongs to the Christian organization, Love in the Name of Christ. A friend of his snapped the photo in late July and then posted it on Facebook where it quickly went viral.

On Tuesday, police arrested the kid and charged him with, get this, desecrating a venerated object — a rarely used 1972 law. If he’s convicted, he could be looking at two years in juvenile jail. In case you are wondering, like I was, Pennsylvania law defines “desecration” as:

“Defacing, damaging, polluting or otherwise, physically mistreating in a way that the actor knows will outrage the sensibilities of persons likely to observe or discover the action.”

In other words, the teen hasn’t been been charged with damaging anything, he’s been charged for possibly offending a religious person by putting his crotch in the face of a Jesus statue.…

Willie NobleLITTLE ROCK, AR  – Little Rock Police  say 48-year-old Willie Noble didn’t care much about his future freedom when he walked out of his home and started shooting at a car full of teenagers who vandalized his car.

One of those bullets ended up hitting and killing 15-year-old Adrian Broadway, and now Noble is looking at a first degree murder charge.

It happened on at around 1 a.m. Saturday morning after Broadway and a group of her friends pulled up to Noble’s residence for the second time that night, and covered Noble’s car with leaves, eggs and mayo.

Noble came running out of the house armed with a gun, and opened fire on the group of teens as they drove away. Police say the group drove to a nearby gas station and called 911 after realizing Broadway had been shot in the head.

Adrian Broadway

Adrian Broadway

She was rushed to Arkansas Children’s Hospital where she would be pronounced dead. Aside from the driver of the vehicle suffering lacerations to his hand from broken glass, no one else in the car was injured.

Kenneth James VanlueAUSTIN, TX – Police say they arrested a man who broke into and vandalized a Department of Public Safety’s driver license office , including committing a bit of fecal-graffiti.

Kenneth Vanlue, 40, was arrested and charged with criminal mischief and burglary of a building after approaching troopers investigating a break-in at the office on North Lamar Boulevard, an affidavit said.

According to police, about 7:30 a.m. Wednesday, troopers responded to a reported burglary at the office, where they discovered the front door glass smashed. The windows had been broken with a brake drum, the affidavit said.

When troopers entered the building, they found several items destroyed, extensive damage to the office’s computers and equipment, and the word “surcharge” written in feces on the lobby wall. Yep, sounds like someone with a gripe to me. Or IBS.

The officers also found two severely damaged department vehicles, both with body damage caused by a sharp tool. Trash cans had been used to smash the vehicles’ windows as well as bust up the hoods and trunks, according to the affidavit.…

Huber Heights, OH — Jesus. I am having a hard time finding anything to write about today that comes close to the face eater, the intestine thrower and the dog that was skinned alive. I’m guessing that’s actually a good thing.

So here’s a story about a man who drove his truck into a Taco Bell because they left a 99-cent taco off his order.

According to police, Michael Smith had driven away from a Taco Bell drive-through with a meal for him and his girlfriend when he realized they had left off a taco. Slightly annoyed, Smith drove back through the drive-through and politely pointed out the error to the employees because, well, shit happens.

Sorry, that was me. I get enraged when people almost kill me in traffic, or the DD server goes down as I am publishing a story… I don’t get ‘roid rage whenever some teen making minimum wage gets my order wrong at a fast food restaurant. I just assume that’s gonna happen so that I am pleasantly surprised when it doesn’t.…

Ehrhardt, SCSHowing Animals Respect and Kindness (SHARK), an Illinois animal rights group, has taken the fight against animal cruelty into the 21st century by equipping a state-of-the-art helicopter drone with surveillance equipment to create a platform by which the behavior – or misbehavior – of hunters can be recorded and assessed. Effective? You decide…

On February 12, SHARK operatives deployed the drone outside of the boundary of the Broxton Bridge Plantation. Broxton Bridge Plantation is self-described as offering ‘a wide variety of hunting opportunities on over 7,000 acres of land’ including ‘deer hunting, wild hog hunting, duck hunting over decoys, in addition to pheasants and bobwhite quail.’ On this particular day, though, the target of SHARK was a BBP pigeon hunt.

As the hunters were positioned on the plantation grounds ready for the hunt to begin, SHARK members completed final preparations to the drone that was to serve to document the hunters’ vile actions and contempt for animal life. At the crucial moment, the video-equipped high-technology eight-propeller helicopter drone is released and lifts flawlessly into the air.  …

Winter Haven, FL – Sheriff’s deputies in Florida are searching for the assailant in an execution-style slaying of a Florida laundramat change machine.

The man was recorded on video entering the Busy Bubbles laundramat, drawing a semi-automatic pistol, and firing a single round into the machine. He then pauses and reaches out to his victim – presumably to check for a pulse. Clearly not satisfied, the stone-cold killer then fires multiple rounds into the victim while it sits motionless. The assailant then flees.

The suspect is described as a black male, approximately 5’11” tall, 185 lbs., wearing a gray hoodie and dark baggy pants. As the perpetrator did not recover any money from the victim, it is suspected that he will be charged with attempted robbery when captured.

If anyone has information about this incident or can identify this suspect, they are urged to contact Polk County Detective Jason Paquin at (863) 287-9037.

Only together can we stop organized crime…

Denver, CO — As evident by Jaded’s reaction to Septic Flesh, certain people just don’t appreciate fine art. Some people in a Denver museum learned this as well when a drunken idiot stumbled in and tried to piss on a painting worth millions of dollars.

Police say that at around 3:30 p.m. on Dec 29, a heavily intoxicated Carmen Lucette Tisch showed her disdain for “1957-J-No. 2.,” a $30 million painting by Clyfford Still, by walking up to it and attacking it.

Witnesses say the 36-year-old scratched and hit the painting before dropping trou and putting her ass against it. That’s when she reportedly slid down the painting and began urinating.

Luckily, she did not successfully spray the 9 1/2 feet tall and 13 feet wide painting with her stank, but she did do an estimated $10,000 worth of damage and get slapped with a felony criminal mischief charge, which carries a maximum sentence of up to 12 years in prison.

Probably not much of a surprise, but this isn’t Tisch’s first run-in with the law.…

SANTA ROSA, CA — Look. it’s a slow day so I’m going to just throw a couple stories out there starting with five boys who are facing charges of vandalism and animal abuse after they broke into a school.

The kids got inside a mobile classroom at Northwest Prep and turned over a refrigerator, broke windows, tagged the outside of the classroom with gang graffiti, tore up the school’s vegetable garden and tortured a pet hamster to death.

“It was bad. They did three different cruel things to it,” Sgt. Mike Raasch said. Of course I want to know what the hell they did to it, but no one is reporting on what these three cruel things were. They got busted after a woman playing volleyball at the school heard glass breaking and watched the boys run from the unit when she went to go investigate. She was able to identify them to police.

Two 11-year-old boys were arrested on suspicion of felony vandalism and released to their mothers, while two 13-year-old boys and a 14-year-old boy were arrested for burglary and vandalism and booked into juvenile hall.…

Lakeville, MN — A 34-year-old man with a history of mental illness was arrested Saturday after police say he approached the altar at the All Saints Catholic Church and poured a liquid believed to be urine atop the altar and Book of Gospels.

The house was rocking Saturday evening, with anywhere from 700-900 people in attendance, when Steven Fay entered the church and headed straight for the altar. According to the criminal complaint, Fay, who was not a member of the church, then turned to face the parishioners, opened his jar of pee and proceeded to pour.

Fay was confronted by an off-duty police officer as he attempted to leave the church. As the officer grabbed his jacket, Fay reportedly began throwing punches and yelled “I hate Christians!” He then slipped out of his jacket and continued toward the door, only to be subdued by a group of parishioners.

“People were jarred and probably a bit frightened,” said Reverend Tom Wilson. “But they were also calm and there was a prayerful presence at the same time.”

Lakeville police were quick to respond, and Fay was taken into custody within five minutes.…

Woman Accused Of Stabbing, Mutilating Pigs

February 11, 2011 at 3:44 am by  

Chesapeake, VA — Authorities have reason to believe 21-year-old Ashley Marie Fowler entered Zack Sawyer’s pig pen Monday night and repeatedly stabbed a couple of his pigs, decapitating one of them.

Animal Control officers say the headless pig’s body, which had multiple stab wounds, was left in the pig pen – it’s head was left on Sawyer’s front porch. The second pig was so brutally stabbed it had to be euthanized.

Sawyer claims Fowler is acquainted with his ex-girlfriend and may have murdered the pigs in retaliation over a breakup. “The girl I broke up with, her friend is crazy as sin,” he says, “If you do seditious stuff like that, you need to go to jail and spend a lot of time in there.”

Fowler was arrested on Wednesday and charged with two felony counts of killing/maiming livestock, one count of misdemeanor vandalism (police say Sawyer also had his tires slashed), and one count of possession of prescription pills. She has since been released on bond.

Arrest made in pig decapitation case:

Jackson, TN — At about 2:30 Tuesday morning, Jackson police were dispatched to Northeast Middle School after neighbors heard an alarm going off in the building. When officers arrived on scene, they determined that someone had gained entry into the building through a broken window. It didn’t appear as if anything had been stolen, and aside from the broken window, nothing had been damaged. Curious. Officers found their first clue laying on the floor – it was a wallet. Inside that wallet, identification belonging to one Dakotah Lamuska. With that evidence in hand, police decided to sneak a peek at the surveillance video from the day. As they watched the tape, their suspect appeared on screen…he was dancing. Butt-nekkid. Police are baffled! They have no idea why someone would get nekkid, break into a school and start dancing. My own personal opinion? Bucket list. (#6,747 on my own list). Anyway, the video also showed 24-year-old Lamuska airing his junk outside of the building as well. Twinkle toes has been charged with burglary, vandalism and indecent exposure.…

Columbus, GA – Some of you may recall a story we posted back in May concerning an incident at a popular playground in Columbus. Long story short, someone taped several box-cutter type razor blades to the handles and steps of the slides and other playground equipment for shits and giggles. Fortunately, the blades were spotted and removed before any blood was spilled. Well, it appears as if the police have arrested the douchebags responsible for the evil act. Derek Fullum, 21, and Gary Bryan, 18, have admitted to planting the blades as a joke…they just wanted to see what would happen. “They say that they did not target the children even though they put these razor blades on playground equipment that was played with by children. They classified it as a party prank,” said Columbus Police Chief Ricky Boren. “They also told us about other times they had been to the park and vandalized some of the areas. One individual made a statement that they wanted to see how it would change lives of people.” Both have been charged with criminal damage to property in the first-degree and are being held in the Muscogee County Jail.…

Frankenstein Arrested At Toby Keith Concert

August 30, 2010 at 2:55 am by  

Anderson Twp., OH – Again, another group of words I never thought I’d have to combine in the same sentence. ‘Tis true, though – Frankenstein apparently enjoys Toby Keith and beer but dislikes police officers and patrol cars. He was arrested at the concert Saturday night after he allegedly threatened to cut a couple of police officers. It’s been reported that an intoxicated Frankenstein approached the officers and threatened them multiple times, stating, “If I had a knife I would stab you.” Unamused, the officers shackled the drunken country fan and placed him in a patrol car. Once in the backseat, Frankenstein let loose with his fury, kicking out the rear side window. Frankenstein was then placed in another patrol car where he proceeded to beat the shit out of the partition with his face. Personally, I probably would have beaten myself senseless before attending a Toby Keith concert, but that’s just me. Anyway, Frankenstein continued to run his mouth at the hospital, threatening law enforcement and medical personnel alike. After he was stitched up, he was placed in a cell.…

EAST FARMINGDALE, N.Y. – We already had once incident this month where the body of an 9-year-old disabled girl was stolen from a cemetery in Pennsylvania, now we have one of a body stolen from a cemetery in New York. Police say that sometime between Monday evening and early Tuesday morning, vandals broke into St. Charles Cemetery in East Farmingdale. The ghouls got inside three different mausoleums and in one of them, a casket had been taken out and smashed open. The casket contained the remains of an 87-year-old woman buried 12 years ago and are currently missing. Police do not believe the woman was specifically targeted but that whoever did it came with the tools to perform such an act. The Diocese Brooklyn operates the cemetery and has contacted family members to let them know what some sick assholes had done. Bishop Nicholas DiMarzio called the desecration an “incomprehensible” act. I don’t subscribe to the whole ‘the body is sacred even after death” crap and personally, you could turn my dead ass into a rotting marionette for all I care.…

Toledo, Ohio – A woman got so upset with some McDonald’s employees over their inability to server her Chicken McNuggets, she is facing vandalism charges after fighting with them at the drive-through before busting out the window. 25-year-old Melodi Dushane was captured on surveillance video as she gets out of her car and confronts the workers, punching one of them in the face after getting upset over their refusal to serve her the McNuggets because they were still serving breakfast. One of the employees fights back a bit, pulling Dushane’s hair, before finally getting the window closed. Still not done with her rampage, Dushane grabs a beer bottle and hurls it through the drive-through window then drives off. I have some video footage after the jump and my description does not do it justice. Dushane is crazy as hell and for some reason her unbridled rage turns me on a bit. For now she has been charged with vandalism, but I am betting that more charges will follow, particularly for the “punching the worker in the face” thing.…

Boise, ID– Idaho police believe they may have finally solved a year-long condiment crime spree. Since May 2009, Ada County library employees have reported finding books in the drop box covered in corn syrup and ketchup. In a stakeout this last Sunday, police were able to ketchup with the condiment caper and to their surprise it was a 74-year old woman named Joy L. Cassidy. Officers nabbed Cassidy just moments after she pulled through the outside drive-through of the library and dumped a jar of mayonnaise into the library’s book drop box. Cassidy was charged with malicious injury to property and carrying a concealed weapon, after police found a loaded handgun under the front seat of her car. Cassidy did not have a concealed weapons permit. Cassidy was also issued a citation for driving on an expired driver’s license. Police say Cassidy is a person of interest in at least 10 other condiment-related crimes that have left library books soiled and sticky over the past year and caused thousands of dollars worth of damage.…

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