Elk Lick, PA – We have an ungodly number of animal fuckers here at the Dreamin’ Demon. And, unfortunately, we have also tallied up a considerable number of baby rapers. However, I can’t recall a single story where the two were combined. Until now. Authorities are accusing 38-year-old Rodney Lee Thomas of raping the family pet and an infant. Somerset County Children and Youth Services alerted law enforcement on Tuesday, accusing Thomas of sexually assaulting a 9-month-old baby girl. During the investigation, it was revealed the child had been raped at least three times between February 7 and MarchMarch reviews 16. If that isn’t bad enough, it is also alleged that he fucked his pet dog, RockyRocky reviews – an act that ultimately led to the dog’s death. For his many vile offenses, Thomas is facing charges of rape, sexual assault, aggravated indecent assault, endangering the welfare of children, simple assault, making terroristic threats and three counts of sexual intercourse with an animal. Bond has been set at $100,000. Thomas reportedly told authorities he has been involved in this type of activity since he was a teenager. And really, I have no idea what that means. Has he been fucking dogs since he was a teen, or babies? Both? Either way – he’s wasting air and space.

SAN ANTONIO – Look, if you are an adult and play any type of online video game, you have gotten used to the jackasses. It’s par for the course and if you cannot handle it, simply play with your two friends or just don’t play online games. For Xbox 360 owners, the term jackass defines the thousands of 13-year-olds telling you what they are going to do to your mother after you kill them in whatever game that involves firearms. Well one of these jackasses got his ass in a lot of trouble the other day while playing “Modern Warfare 2″ when he started telling anyone who would listen how he was planning to shoot up his school. Unfortunately for him, some dude from Canada was listening, and he took the threats seriously. Oh, and warning, the video after the jump starts automatically, so adjust your volume so you don’t piss your pants at work like I did. [Read more...]

Mesa, Arizona – A mother got fed up with her son being bullied by a boy at the Academy with Community Partners and did something kinda understandable but undoubtedly stupid. The school had failed to do anything about the repeated reports of bullying so on Thursday,  Tracy Branham took matters into her own hands. She arrived at the school to pick up some papers for her son when she saw the bully and his two brothers standing out front. Frustrated from a meeting with school officials the previous day about the bullying in which she described a staff that “didn’t seem to care” Branham began cursing at the boy and demanding he apologize to her son. The boy allegedly cussed her out and the trio headed into the administrative office. Branham followed. Once inside the office, she continued her rant against the three boys as well as the staff. Charlotte Hooper, the three boys mother, arrived at the school a short time later and Branham started cursing at her as well. [Read more...]

Houston, DE - After his girlfriend’s two teens were brutally attacked, Wayne Jones tried to convince the cops he and the children had been jumped. His version of the story went a little something like this – at around midnight last FridayFriday reviews evening, Wayne decided to take the kids, a 13-year-old boy and 16-year-old girl, out for ice cream. But first he had to stop at his parents’ home and borrow some money. While there, he noticed the front door of a vacant house next door was open and he decided to investigate. It was then, he said, that he was attacked by a couple of unknown suspects. When the kids entered the home looking for him, they, too, were attacked. The unknown suspects fled the vacant home after beating the shit out of everyone, Wayne put the kids in the car and drove around for an hour looking for help. Hmmm…even if I didn’t know the outcome of this story, I’d still think that story had a strong odor of bullshit surrounding it. And, I’d be right… [Read more...]

MORROW, Georgia – On Wednesday night, 45-year-old William C. Caldwell III was dressed in an elf costume and waiting in line with kids to see the Santa at Southlake Mall. When he got to the front of the line, Caldwell allegedly told Santa that he had dynamite in his bag. Santa then called security. The mall was evacuated and GBI bomb squad called in. No explosives were found, but the mall did not re-open that night. Caldwell is in jail charged with making terroristic threats, false public alarm, reckless conduct, disorderly conduct, possession of a hoax device, false imprisonment and simple assault. You know, at first this is kinda funny, envisioning a man looking like Caldwell dressed as an elf waiting in line with some kids. But then the dynamite thing just has me thinking, what a fucking dick. Not only did the mall lose a ton of money over this stunt, he unnecessarily scared the living shit out of some kids just trying to enjoy the holiday with their parents. Had I been there in the crowded mall surrounded by sheeple spending my paycheck away on overpriced shit for people who don’t deserve it and later in line with a bunch of snot-nosed brats waiting to pay too much for for a pic with a dude in a red suit trying to supplement his Social Security because of the Hen’s incessant whining about doing things with the family, only to end up being herded out because of some jackass…I would’ve punched the fucker in the face.  [Read more...]

NEW BEDFORD, Massachusetts. – This story makes me laugh. Two rappers, Matthew Rufino, 24, and Jason Foley, 28, posted a YoutubeYouTube video entitled “Watch 4 Me” that landed them in jail. These two idiots are not aware of what the First Amendment actually covers when they decided to threaten two people in the video by name. One was State Trooper Paul Gifford, who had given Rufino a ticket for driving on a suspended license a few years back and the other was Judy Young, a probation officer who supervised Rufino on a pot possession charge. Adding to their hardcore street cred, Rufino and Foley have been arrested and charged with two counts of making threats to commit a crime, threats to use a firearm and intimidation of a witness. [Read more...]

Salina, KS – I have seen my fair share of idiots here at the Dreamin’ Demon, but Michael Sampson? He could be their friggin’ leader. Initially hauled into court on minor offenses – driving with a suspended license and littering -  Sampson, for whatever reason, dug himself a hole by threatening the judge and her court with moronic sign language. Wednesday afternoon, during his Municipal Court trial, Sampson allegedly held up his fist and pointed at a Salina police officer before making some kind of vulgar gesture. Sampson then held his fingers to his own head in the shape of a gun and then pointed his finger gun at that same officer. When asked if he wanted to testify on his own behalf, he responded by pointing to a court officer, the judge, and the prosecutor and making a “slashing gesture across his throat.” Ooooo, scary. While he got off fairly easy on the original charges – found guilty of driving while suspended and sentenced to 90 days in jail, 80 days suspended and acquitted of the littering charge – he is now looking at more serious charges. Michael Sampson, 41, is now charged with four counts of making a criminal threat and one count of aggravated intimidation of a witness – all felonies. What a dumbass…. [Read more...]

Atlanta, Georgia – When John Michalik observed a group of Atlanta Department of Public Works employees doing a bit of JackJack reviews and Shit while blocking a road – he pulled out his camera and began filming them. The workers were not pleased by being on camera and one of them let Michalik know it with threats and racial slurs. “You keep putting that camera in my face, I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll take that motherfucking camera and whoop your ass,” yelled a DPW employee on the tape. What was the worker doing? reading a tabloid that he displayed to the camera saying he was, “Reading about y’alls crazy ass white folks.” While his fellow employees tried to calm the their fellow worker down, he wasn’t finished. He called John Michalik a “crazy ass cracker” and before driving off he stated, “I’m ’bout to get this motherfucking hammer and beat the fucking hell out of him.” [Read more...]

DeLand, Florida - When I was just a little Jaded, I wanted to grow up and become a cop. I dreamed of saving the world with my shiny gun and my big-ass flashlight. Now that I’m almost all grown up, I realize that I never would have made it past the first week – I would have had a run-in with the likes of the lovely Julie Hubbard and I would have totally lost my shit. The arrest report would have read, “The cracked bitch spit on my leg, and that’s when I pulled out my big-ass flashlight and lit up her insides. The end.” Julie turned what could have been a simple ticket and a fine into a sputum flinging, name calling, law enforcement officer threatening, clusterfuck. [Read more...]

Dallas, Texas – WomenWomen reviews in the Turtle Creek and Oak Lawn area are being told to keep your eyes peeled for any suspicious behavior as a very brazen robber has now been linked to five attacks on females. Their concern is that the guy is getting bolder with every consecutive attack. Police say that the man cases parking lots surprising his targets as they are distracted. Using a gun, he makes the victim take him to ATM’s. In two cases, he has broken into the victims’ homes. An accomplice held one victim at the home while he took the other to an ATM. He made one victim strip naked and get in her closet as he went through her apartment, stealing small electronics and jewelry. So ladies, keep your eyes peeled. It is very important that while you are carrying that bag of shoes while talking on the cell phone about Alicia’s ugly new hairstyle that you are constantly aware of your surroundings! [Read more...]

Washington, PA - Foreplay do – when in the mood, sweet nothings in his ear, a sly glance, and a fluttering of the eyelashes may relay to the object of your desire that you are in the mood for some nookie. Foreplay don’t – informing the object of your desire that if he doesn’t do you right now, you will cut his dick open and watch him bleed to death, right before you slap him across the face. While that may ‘do it’ for some men, *coughMorbidcough* one dude in particular had a problem with Samantha Harvey’s approach. On August 20, Samantha allegedly approached the 20-year-old male as he was getting ready for bed. After delivering her awesome come-on line, Samantha forced the man into her bedroom (I’m assuming the two are roommates), and ordered him to perform. To further entice him, she allegedly clipped a hot curling iron on to his ear.  [Read more...]

KEANSBURG, NJ - Two teen boys were involved in some kind of dispute. The father of one of the boys was a friend of 41-year-old Tara Donahue. He had the cell phone number of the other teen so Donahue decided she was going to get involved and call this kid and give him a piece of her mind because she was “looking out for her friend’s children.” She dialed the number and when the person answered, she began threatening them and threatening to kill them and the person’s mother. The person she was talking to was police dispatcher John Swartz. She had called the police station by accident. [Read more...]

Fond du Lac, WI – You may recall a story I posted last week about the scorned women armed with Krazy Glue and a plan. At the time, I had no further information on the victim, his name withheld because he was the victim of a sexual assault. Well, as luck would have it, this whole crazy quadrangle is back in the news again. So now, we get a peek at the object of the womens’ affections – Donessa Davis Sr. He gets his own little spot on the Dreamin’ Demon because he is every bit the wacko those women are – and then some. After the melee from the penis gluing incident died down, Donessa was arrested on charges of child abuse, theft, and harassment. Hell, I’m not sure I even know where to begin. [Read more...]

Naples, FL- I hate it when people make empty threats. I’m never going to talk to you again. I’m going to run away. I’m going to kill your mother. I’m going to do my own laundry from now on. If only that last one would stick. A friend of my hubby’s once said he wished someone would invent something to make the menial chores like washing dishes and doing laundry less troublesome. I told them they did. Unfortunately, it’s called a woman. Oops, now I’m getting off track again. Here’s the story. [Read more...]