South Daytona, FL - I meant to get this story up yesterday, but my computer is suffering from a severe case of constipation. So, here I am a day late and always a dollar short. The grizzled old perv staring back at ya today is 56-year-old Ronald Thornton. While visiting his son’s home last SaturdaySaturday reviews evening, Ronald got a hankerin’ for a piece of his granddaughter’s 7-year-old friend. At some point during the visit, Ronald allegedly entered his granddaughter’s bedroom, grabbed her little friend by the wrist, and whisked the child off to the bathroom, locking the door behind him. Meanwhile, Ronald’s son, Jason Thornton, became alarmed after he witnessed the child quickly vanish behind the bathroom door. Thinking there was something wrong with the child, Jason knocked on the door and asked the little girl if she was ok. The kid didn’t answer, so he asked again. This time, he heard the voice of his father coming from behind the locked bathroom door. “We’ll be out in a minute,” he said. [Read more...]

Memphis, Tennessee - Skipping all the hassles of whores and Rohypnol, police say that Dr. John O’Connell with Lakeside Behavioral Health sexually assaulted a co-worker after hypnotizing her. The woman was trying to kick a smoking habit and the good doctor told her that he could help her quit that stupid, nasty, disgusting habit with a little bit of hypnosis. She agreed to it and for their second session they arranged to meet at his “satellite office“. I put that in quotes because that office is a room at the Relax Inn. I shit you not. Anyway, the woman went along with it and was instructed to lie on the bed where “he took off her socks and shoes, that later led to her shirt,” said said Steve Shular, spokesperson for the Shelby County Sheriff’s Dept. Court papers state Dr. O’Connell repeated “You are very relaxed and will not remember this when you wake up” to the alleged victim. She says he then fondled her tits.
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Manatee County, Florida Art Linkletter hit a gold mine when he came out with his “Kids Say The Darndest Things“. It was such a hit because I think every single person could relate to hearing children reveal such intimate details so innocently or say some very adult things taken so far out of context. All of it either embarrassing or funny as hell. Or both. There’s something so engaging about listening to a child explain something. Especially when they know they have your undivided attention. They become a bit more willing to share, a bit more animated in their story telling abilities. And if an adult has all the appropriate reactions, the child’s trust and willingness grows. Which was perhaps the case of this three year-old. I can’t imagine the intensity of the attention she received when she said, “Daddy Lorne touched my cooter and it hurt.” [Read more...]

Lake County, Florida Ah, being released from prison must be an overwhelming experience. Freedom again…at last. Another chance has been given to set things right with your life, get a job, find love, celebrate the golden years. I’m sure that goes through every prisoner’s heads…or rather a great deal of them. And so many don’t get the chance to start “anew” as their terms count down the remaining years of their lives. I’m sure so many spending life sentences would give their left nut to have the chance Martrez Anderson had, to get sprung from prison at the young age of 25…to live each day to the fullest. But Martrez just couldn’t cope with being out. Within 5 days of being released, he just had to do something stupid to land his ass back in the poky for a bit longer. How many years does rape carry? [Read more...]

Boynton Beach, Florida I’m sure it’s safe to say all of us have walked the same routes to and from someplace so often we become completely aware of what’s in it’s proper place and what’s missing. When I was young, walking home from school was filled with common sights. The same older people who volunteered their time to make sure we all crossed the highway safely, the old lady sitting on her porch with fresh baked cookies or a bowl of candy for us as we returned home. That whole experience gave such a sense of normalcy and general good feeling to those of us passing by. And we’d always look if these people were not within sight, waiting for us. Yet I somehow cannot help but feel sorry for the children who lived along the route of Franklin Davidson, the pervert who liked to call attention to himself to all youngsters crossing his path, only to wave his privates in their general direction. [Read more...]

Bradenton, FL- Warning! The nasty ham-beast being front paged today is going to make any recent food some of you may have just consumed creep back up into your throat and remind you once again to read the DD first before eating. Then again, most of our stories will ruin your appetite, so you can just go ahead and consider this site not only a great place to read about true crime, but also an excellent deterrent to weight-gain. Now, on to the icky details. [Read more...]

Palm Bay, FL-After being sexually abused repeatedly over the last two years, a 14-year old girl finally escaped the clutches of her abuser. Police arrested 33-year old Andrew Stitzel and charged him with nine counts of sexual battery and five counts of child pornography on SaturdaySaturday reviews at a Motel 6. When interviewed, Stitzel admitted to having sex with the teen in wooded lots and later taking nude photographs of her. He said he planned to email them to another person, which he refused to identify, but later deleted them. Unfortunately for him, the girl took the memory card from his digital camera so she’d have evidence for the police, which was sent to a Florida Department of Law Enforcement lab to be retrieved. Additional charges may be pending for his skeevy ass and he remains in jail on a $675,000 bond.

Tavares, FL – As long as the mouth breathers of the world remain fertile, we will never have a shortage of material to put up on the front page of the Demon.  And as long as we have women that refuse to believe what their children tell them, people like James McDonald, 35, will never have to go very far for victims.  When McDonald’s now 10 year old victim told her shit-for-brains mother that she was being abused, she told the little girl it was all just a dream.  Idiot. [Read more...]

Altamonte Springs, Florida Why is it that some of the best stories originate in Florida? I mean, some of the most idiotic crimes and excuses are from Floridians who don’t seem to have an ounce of common sense. Is it intense sun? Perhaps a study should be conducted regarding the constant smell of coconut butter and the affects on the typical ass-wipe’s brain. And having lived a few miles from the Florida State line in a resort town, I understand how just about anything goes. Everyday is like parade day. You surely know what I mean. People pulling the stupid stunts like walking out in front of traffic expecting the drivers of the vehicles to realize the world stops because they’re eager to get to the beach, etc. People wearing ridiculous clothes or the morbidly obese people sporting the tiniest bathing suits. (well, tiny on them) I came to the conclusion while living down there, the police really do put up with a lot of crap and look past a great deal as well. Except when it’s a nude guy making a get away on a bicycle after being chased by the father of a 14 year old girl. [Read more...]

Sarasota, Florida — Mark Dungan-Carpenter, 21, lived at Sandy’s Family Childcare, a private residential child care facility owned by his mother and operated by his grandmother.  Although he wasn’t an employee, he was occasionally paid to babysit the kids.  According to police, Dungan-Carpenter was doing a little more than babysitting.  He was arrested for sexually battering a 5-year-old boy at his home daycare. You can tell by Mark Dugan-Carpenter’s MySpaceMySpace that he doesn’t have much of a life.   He states his occupation as X-Box 360.  His gamer tag is EoP Ryloth, and he hopes to be sponsored by a big named company someday.  Like that’s really going to happen now. [Read more...]

Mt. Arlington, NJ –  I’ll be the first to say that school bus drivers have a pretty crappy job.  Kudos for those who do the job and keep their sanity.  Lacking abundant patience with other people’s kids and a general annoyance of other drivers, I couldn’t drive a school bus.  I might possibly end up in jail for smacking some smart ass teen upside the head.  However, that isn’t what school bus driver Edward M. Comperchio was arrested for.  [Read more...]

NASHUA, NH -  A beast most foul, Jonathan Blaney, 22, has admitted to raping a young relative three times, starting when the young boy was just 5-years-old.  Until now, at age ten, the boy kept his painful secret.  [Read more...]

It has been a lovely day with some exciting action in the forums.  We have discussed various ways to prepare a hot dog, the difference between livermush and liverwurst, and the benefits of waterproof mascara at mugshot time.  But alas, it’s that time again.  TimeTime reviews to bring you a short summary of some stories that did not quite make the cut in time for a full write up, but are filled with enough asshattery to be noteworthy.

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Boston, Massachusetts–Christopher Mundell’s girlfriend made a late night food run, leaving her 2 1/2 year old daughter in his care. How long she was away from the apartment is unknown, but it was long enough to forever change the life of her little girl. [Read more...]