Frederick, MD - Police say Marian Larman left her 3-year-old child alone in the car, strapped in a car seat, for as many as four hours while she got her heroin fix on in a room at a Motel 6. Larman reportedly checked into the room at about 3:00 a.m. and a passerby noticed the child at about 7:00 a.m. The temperature at the time was about 57 degrees. Police found Larman passed out in the bathtub, surrounded by her collection of drugs, which included heroin, prescription drugs and cocaine, and an assortment of drug paraphernalia. A search of her vehicle yielded even more heroin. Pathetic, really – she has tons of pictures of her and the kid posted on her Myspace. Tons of happy, smiling, good-time pics. The child looks happy, healthy and well taken care of. You’re screwin’ shit up, mommy…big time. Larman, 34, was booked on numerous drug charges, one count of reckless endangerment, one count of confinement of an unattended child, and one count of second-degree assault.…Continue Reading
Wenatchee, WA - Pop quiz, Demonites!! How many foreign objects do you think one dude could cram up his poop chute? Mind you, we aren’t talking about singular foreign objects, we are talking a collection of foreign objects grouped together before said cramming. Before today, my guess would have been somewhere around 4.5, and that’s stretching it a bit. Give up? How ’bout I just give you the full list, k? One cigarette lighter, rolling papers, a golf-ball sized baggie of smoking tobacco, one bottle of tattoo ink, eight tattoo needles, a smoking pipe measuring approximately 1″, a small baggie of ganja, and a partridge in a pear tree. Ok…so I’m just shittin’ ya about the bird, but that is quite an assload, no? According to authorities, Gavin Stanger, 24, packed all that junk in his trunk for a three day stay at Chelan County Regional Justice Center, leaving law enforcement officers shaking their heads in amazement. “We were all wondering, ‘How do you put all that up there?’” Wenatchee Police Department spokesman Sgt.…Continue Reading
EVANS, Colo. - You know, I didn’t think anyone would top Jaded’s Thursday ritual of drinking box wine and then driving naked around the neighborhood on a riding lawnmower while flicking lit cigarettes at children, but I am pretty sure 21-year-old Gary Carville has her beat. Police say that on Thursday, Carville got into a fight with his girlfriend stemming from the fact that their 10-month-old puppy named “Midnight” kept waking him up with his early-morning barking. He also wasn’t happy with her stupid decision to give up smoking cigarettes and weed because, well, she’s pregnant. After smashing his bong and cutting his hand, Carville grabbed his woman by the throat while punching his girlfriend’s mother a couple times when she tried to intervene. But he wasn’t done yet. Carville then took Midnight and tossed his ass off a bridge and into the South Platte River. The police report has the girlfriend stating she saw the dog “flip” out of Carville’s hands as they drove over the river, and then she “heard it splash.” She added that when they went back over the bridge they saw the puppy trying to swim, but sadly no one has seen the dog since.…Continue Reading
Stamford, Conn - Tomas Manzano, 35, is probably going to go down in history as one of the most embarassing parents we have ever featured here on D’D. On Wednesday he was one of 39 chaperone’s accompanying his son’s fifth-grade class from Stillmeadow Elementary School on a field trip to Manhattan. Before the end of the day, Manzano will have fought with a teacher and the cops, as well as molested a handful of his son’s female classmates. Reports are that Manzano seemed fine when the class visited the Bronx Zoo, but that he started to show signs of being intoxicated shortly after. It turns out that the water bottle he had been sipping from did not contain water, but rather Vodka. A teacher ended up confronting Manzano when they witnessed Manzano caressing a girl’s face on the bus. It’s at that point two other girls told the teacher that Manzano had touched their “private parts”. When the bus arrived at the restaurant Mars 2112 on Broadway, the cops were called.…Continue Reading
Augusta, GA - Nothing strengthens that daddy-daughter bond like a few brewskies, no? I remember the first time I got shit-faced with my dear old dad. I had just turned 21. Dad taught me how to play beer pong and I taught him how to roll a quarter off his nose, bounce it off the table and straight into a shot glass. Good times…goood times. Jeffrey Hickson likes to throw a couple back with his kiddo, too. Difference is, she’s only 9. The child was spending time with her drunken daddy Wednesday evening when she placed a tearful call to her mother, and begged to come home. According to police, Hickson, thoroughly intoxicated himself, forced his child to drink beer and threatened to kill her if she didn’t. When he realized the child had called her mother, he drove the child out to the woods and took her out of the car. “No idea what he was planning on doing in the woods. It’s very scary. Don’t really know what was going through his head,” said Richmond County Sheriff’s Captain Scott Peebles.…Continue Reading
Collinsville, IL- In case you are wondering, the writing on the shirt of the inebriated idiot to the left reads “Cleverly Disguised as a RESPONSIBLE ADULT.” I beg to differ. Just by looking at the man’s mugshot and reading the news on him, I seriously doubt he even knows how to spell the word adult. Or clever. Last Saturday, 44-year old Timothy A. Neal and his twin 18-year old sons, Daniel and Timothy W. Neal, were celebrating the holiday at bonfire near Collinsville. Another man at the bonfire began talking about religion and demons which resulted in an argument erupting between him and the Neal trio. Suddenly, Neal and his two sons began pummeling the man which resulted in him being taken to a local hospital for treatment to injuries to his face. Neal and his sons were arrested and the three were charged with a felony charge of mob action. Beings the twins were intoxicated, they were also charged with unlawful consumption of alcohol by a minor. The men were taken into custody and transported to the Madison County Jail.…Continue Reading
Oklahoma City – I am pretty sure this is the
second third stiletto attack story we have had here. Yup, it is. The last ones involving a guy getting a heel in the eyeball and another with a 52-year-old stripper. In this case, 23-year-old Patricia Peek got pissed off when Shawnta Odell, 23, asked Peek’s boyfriend for a cigarette inside the City Walk bar. An altercation started but the club’s bouncers stepped in and separated the two. Peek wasn’t through with Odell quite yet and ended up punching the woman in the head with her stiletto heel. Bloodied and suffering from a large gash to her head, Odell was taken to the hospital to be treated. Police arrested Peek, who had been detained by the bouncers, on one count of assault and battery with a dangerous weapon. Her high-heels were found in a trash can outside of the club. As anyone who knows me can attest, I love my women crazy and the craziness of Peek gets the blood pumping right to my groin.…
New Port Richey, FL- This is not the first time we have featured an idiotic 911 abuser here on the D’D (missing orange juice, no nuggets) , and I am pretty sure it will not be the last. While I usually prefer to pass on these types of stories, today happens to be one of those times that I cannot. It is not because the man you see featured is any where near the lip-licking eye-candy I usually enjoy posting for you. (Although, he does sort of resemble a much younger Yoda.) It is because 32-year old Charles Dennison is just plain stupid. According to the website suite101.com, calls should only be placed to 911 for potentially life-threatening situations for humans. (E.g. automobile accidents, heart attacks, fires, stolen peanut M&M’s, no internet connection, and so on.) The emergency call that Dennison recently placed to 911 was because…wait for it…his mother took away his beer. Oh, GAWD! The humanity! Personally, I’d rather be beaten with a hundred wire hangers on a nightly basis than have a single one of my ice-cold brew-skis removed from my clutches.…Continue Reading
- I hope you all had a great holiday. Mine was pretty fantastic and I didn’t even get drunk this time. Here are a few stories that caught my eye today that I just didn’t have time or desire to do anything with.
- Orlando, FLA – In a bit of good news for once, it is being reported that Casey Anthony, currently on trial charged with the murder her daughter Caylee Anthony, had a bit of an accident at the courthouse today. She fell after her restraints became entangled while getting out of the Orange County Corrections Department van. Officers were unable to catch her before she fell forward and landed on her dicksuckers. She was taken to a medical facility to treat a busted lip and a chipped tooth.
- DALY CITY, Calif. - Police believe that tainted drugs are responsible for the death of 23-year-old Anthony Mata who took some Ecstasy at the “etd.POP 2010″ music festival Saturday night at the Cow Palace. Eleven other people were hospitalized after attending the festival due to apparently tainted doses of the drug Ecstasy.
- Well, I want to thank me for all the hard work I did today. I did an amazing job and I don’t know what I would do without me. Thanks, me, I am a true gentleman and a scholar. Maybe later I will show me my appreciattion with a nice steak and a handjob. Until then, here are a few stories I didn’t have time to get to.
- JACKSONVILLE BEACH, Fla. – Floridians continue to show true class after Jacquelyn Tinsley was involved in a hit and run where she slammed her van into a car carrying three people. She drove home and forced her 15-year-old son to take the van away so she could report it stolen – which she did. Florida cops, used to this kind of retardation by now, were not buying it. The teen finally admitted the truth and told police where the van was. His mother was arrested, but still spouted her innocence and blamed her son. “Absolutely not. It was all his fault. I had nothing to do with it,” Tinsley said.
LA CENTER, Wash – Police Sgt. Jerry Lester was eating lunch at the Palace Casino when security officers approached him and informed him that a little boy was sitting in a Lincoln Navigator in the parking lot. They paged the 3-year-old boy’s mother and before long, 32-year-old Valerie Tran came outside drunk and just couldn’t understand what the big deal was. She didn’t understand why they were upset at her leaving her kid in a car with no food, spoiled milk and a soiled diaper while she gambled…for thirteen hours. I mean, she would come out of the casino and check on him ever few hours or so. Like, gosh! Cops gave the kid a teddy bear and some fresh clothes while casino employees brought him some water and a PB & J. Child protective services took the boy and charged Tran with leaving a child unattended in a vehicle — a gross misdemeanor that carries a maximum sentence of two years in jail and a $1,000 fine. Anyone find a pic of her and I’ll send you a pair of my underwear I was about to give to Goodwill (nevermind, Coyote wanted ‘em more than anyone).…Continue Reading
HAWTHORNE, Calif. - What are the odds that I would have two stories today featuring dogs peering out from behind bars? Who cares. This story does not involve a pit bull raping kids in a day care, but rather a pit bull who was saved after neighbors observed its owner abusing it. Neighbors heard the yelps of pain and screaming coming from the home of 19 year old Ricardo Salvador Plascenia. When one went to investigate, they witnessed Plascenia slam a 50 pound pit bull, named Mary Jane, onto the concrete. He then punched and kicked Mary Jane before treating her like some kind of flag; hoisting her onto a pole by her choke chain. By time police got there the dog had been taken down, but luckily one of the neighbors captured the entire event on cell phone video. Plascenia was arrested Monday and booked on charges of animal cruely and cultivation of marijuana. Mary Jane was taken to the Carson animal shelter where she will eventually be put up for adoption.…Continue Reading
Harrison Twp., PA – James Histand, 54, was driving along in his Subaru station wagon Sunday evening and somehow managed to get his vehicle stuck in some muck. A most helpful and friendly neighbor, 62-year-old Patrick McNally, came to his rescue with his Ford pickup. After a bit of heaving and hoeing, McNally freed the grocery getter from the mud. Once both vehicles were back on solid ground, McNally laid down on the road to unhook the chain connecting the vehicles. As he was doing that, Histand hit the gas – running over his helpful and friendly neighbor’s face with his left front tire. Police said Histand then called 911 and drove away, only to return on a tractor 20 minutes later. Why a tractor? I have no friggin’ clue, but police believe alcohol was probably a factor. After Histand returned to the scene, he was arrested and charged with two counts of driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs and “numerous summary offenses.” McNally was transported to the hospital for moderate injuries to his face and has since been released.…Continue Reading
Klamath, CA - I don’t know how the hell I managed to miss this one…must have been sleeping off a three day Jäger binge or something. Anyway, back on March 21st, Jarrod Wyatt, a 26-year-old mixed martial arts cage fighter, allegedly killed his friend, 21-year-old Taylor Powell, in a most savage, brutal and gory manner.
According to the probable cause statement, authorities responded to Powell’s home after a man named Justin Davis called to report he had seen a naked and bloody Wyatt standing over Powell’s obviously dead body. Davis told police that he had been at Powell’s residence earlier that day and noticed Wyatt was acting strangely after drinking “some kind of mushroom tea.”
He said he left the residence but returned later to pick up his dog – that’s when he walked in on the gruesome scene. When a deputy arrived at the home, he saw Wyatt on the couch next to his friend’s ravaged corpse. Powell’s body was covered in blood and most of his face was removed.…Continue Reading
Toledo, OH - What is it about food that makes people completely lose their shit? Don’t get me wrong…I love food, especially of the bacon variety, but I don’t see myself getting all stabby over it. Well, maybe just a little stabby. When Aaron Dean’s mother showed up at their apartment with a cheeseburger for herself and none for him, dude got irate! According to his mother, Vergie Dean, her 6’3″ 300-pound son pitched a tizzy fit early Friday morning and assaulted her. “He was like ‘Where’s my food at?’ and I’m like ‘I’m not gonna give you anything’ so he smacked my sandwich and he pushed me or something and it escalated from there.” She said Aaron then began choking her and backed her into a corner. At that point, a knife materialized from somewhere and Vergie stabbed her son in the finger. Aaron stormed off to his room and returned with an extremely large butcher’s knife and said “You cut me! You cut me!” before plunging the knife into his mother’s arm.…Continue Reading
Erlanger, KY – Raymond Jackson is behind bars, facing a somewhat lengthy prison sentence, because he’s a fucking moron. According to authorities, the imbecile allowed and encouraged his toddler step-daughter to drink a mixture of gin and iced tea while he was caring for her and his 6-month-old son over the weekend. The girl was rushed to the emergency room after mom returned home from work and found her passed out and unresponsive. Blood tests taken at the hospital revealed the 2-year-old child’s BAC was .25 – more than three times the minimum for a driver to be presumed impaired under Kentucky law. It’s a damn miracle the kid didn’t die. Raymond’s wife, Amanda, was granted emergency custody of both children and a restraining order against Raymond was granted. In her petition for the order, Amanda claimed the 2-year-old also had fractured ribs and bruising on her head. Poor kid has already been through what amounts to a knock-down, drag-out bar fight and she probably hasn’t even mastered her ABC’s yet…way to go, dickhead.…Continue Reading
Grant, Fla. – Richard Cassin has been arrested and charged in what sheriff’s deputies called the worst case of elderly abuse they’ve ever seen. Coming from sheriff’s deputies in Florida, it must be bad. So were they exaggerating? God, I hope not. When paramedics were called to the home Cassin shares with his 82-year-old mother Florence Cassin, they walked into a horror movie. The arrest reports states that Florence Cassin could only moan and cry as she lay in a bed swarming with thousands of gnats and dead roaches on her pillow. She had insects inside her mouth, rotting food stuck in her hair, and eyes coated with a yellow and green discharge, and she was wearing a dirty diaper. The report indicates that the smell coming off of her was overwhelming – and we all know if someone in Florida says that a smell is overwhelming, it must be bad. She was rushed to the hospital and placed in intensive care. An intoxicated Richard Cassin explained that he had not taken his mother to the doctor in two years because “they just poke and prod her” and he figured “she would just die.” You can check out some video here that has a couple of neighbors weighing in as well as breaking Floridian stereotypes.…Continue Reading
Port St. Lucie, FL – “My mother is a walking piece of shit,” John Wilson said. “I hate my mother.” So he stabbed her. And then he stabbed her some more. He “kept stabbing like an Alfred Hitchcock movie.“ He reportedly said the best stab was “the stab where she stopped breathing.” His mother, 56-year-old Patricia Wilson, died Monday morning after having been repeatedly stabbed in the back and neck by her dear son. I guess I’d better back up and clue you all in on what went down, huh? According to John’s live-in girlfriend, Gina Weathers, John started acting a little freaky over the weekend. He had come in contact with some poison last Saturday while on the job as an exterminator, and had been acting as if he was intoxicated all weekend. Gina and John began arguing early Monday morning because she felt he needed to be seen by a doctor. And because he was “still stumbling around like he was intoxicated,” she hid his car keys from him.…Continue Reading
DENVER, Pa. – On April 17th, 4-year-old Alexandrea died from a lethal dose of methadone and Xanax. Yesterday her 30-year-old father, Brian Moskal, was charged with killing her. Moskal is legally allowed to possess and use these drugs for himself, but admitted to investigators that he also gave them to his daughter. He stated that he gave the girl two doses of the drugs, one at 8 p.m. and one at midnight the morning before she was found unresponsive. Moskal is charged with criminal homicide, drug delivery resulting in death, drug delivery and endangering the welfare of a child. He was not in jail long before he was transported to the hospital in critical condition. No word on why. After posting this, I wanted to double-check to see if anyone had reported on why he was hospitalized. I didn’t find anything, but did find his full mugshot. I think some of you will find his T-shirt interesting. …Continue Reading
Mystery has an article over in the forums about 87-year-old Ola Mae Agee – an alleged crack dealer. The elderly woman was obviously just trying to supplement her income by selling the nasty rock to the local crackheads. She might have gotten away with it, except one of those pesky crackheads wasn’t a crackhead at all – he was an undercover officer. With mugshot. Source: WKRG…Continue Reading