CITRUS HEIGHTS, CA – A man has been charged with attempted murder after he tried to strangle his 3-month-old baby to death in a Walmart parking lot.
Daniel Graf, 32, was at the Walmart on Friday night to meet his estranged wife and visit his daughter. The couple eventually got into an argument over custody arrangements that led to Graf’s wife calling police.
Graf got angry with the responding officer and began walking away with his daughter. Graf then threatened to kill the baby and began strangling her. Realizing the infant was in danger, the officer decided to show Graf the proper way to choke the life out of someone by placing him in a carotid restraint control hold.
“It’s a tactic where the officer applies pressure to both sides of the carotid artery on the neck that will render and individual briefly unconscious,” said Jon Kempf from Citrus Heights Police.
What Kempf is trying to say is that the officer placed Graf in the Sleeper hold, an effective choke-hold I liked to employ on my ex-wife during sex, and before her lawyers got involved.…Continue Reading
MESA, AZ – A woman in Arizona has been accused of stabbing her husband in the back after the couple got into an argument over one of those dumbass Cosmo quizzes.
Noelle Clough, 23, called police on Monday saying that her husband was cut in the back and needed stitches. According to the police report, while she was on the phone she said her husband was choking her so she stabbed him.
When police arrived they found Clough’s husband suffering from a stab wound to the back. When police approached Clough, she informed them that she was a monster and asked to be shot and locked up forever. She told the responding officers that she and her husband had been drinking for a while when they began arguing over a Cosmo quiz and ex-lovers.
She said that the argument became more heated and that her husband threw two knives on the kitchen floor and instructed her to stab him. As he was walking away, she says she meant to cut her husband with a 4-inch blade paring knife, but accidentally stabbed him instead.…Continue Reading
Prosecutors say that 84-year-old Frank Shull let his son, 56-year-old Byron Shull, and his son’s girlfriend, move into his home because Byron was a jobless, recovering alcoholic with nowhere to live.
But instead of being thankful for the help he was receiving from his father, Byron got upset that he had to abide by the rules his father instated while living under his roof. Completely asinine rules like no drinking or smoking the house. So Byron decided to get a little revenge.
“Traditionally the father drinks milk with each meal. When he got his glass of milk that morning, Byron had put at least one bottle of Visine into the milk,” said Cuyahoga County Assistant Prosecutor Andy Nichol.
Byron claims it was meant as a harmless prank, because poisoning your elderly father is hilarious. But after consuming the almost two bottles of Visine his son had put in his milk, the elderly man almost died.…Continue Reading
Grove City, OH – Police received a call from a 13-year-old boy on Sunday morning, telling the dispatcher that his father had just stabbed his mother to death and had instructed him to call 911.
“My dad just killed my mom. He just told me to call you guys,” the boy can be heard telling a 911 dispatcher. “He just ran outside and killed my mom and she’s laying in the grass in front of the apartment.”
The boy’s father, 38-year-old Jeremy Roberts, allegedly chased his ex-wife, Candice Roberts, outside his apartment and stabbed her to death in front of their children. She was there that morning to pick up her kids.
Eventually Roberts gets on the line and tells the dispatcher his wife is under a blanket and that the weapon he used was outside by her body. When the dispatcher asks about what he did, Roberts calmly tells her they will see when they show up.
For the rest of the five-minute 911 call, Roberts can be heard telling his children that they have a big sister who will take care of them.…Continue Reading
BOYNTON BEACH, FL - We have had a couple stories this week detailing someone setting someone else on fire–one in Alaska another in Ohio–and now we have another out of Florida. The difference with this one is that it was all caught on video.
A woman was meeting 54-year-old Roosevelt Mondesir at a gas station so that they could exchange their 4-year-old son. The two are not married, but do share custody of their son. But when Mondesir arrives in his white Jaguar, he does not have their son with him. He does have some gasoline, however, and proceeds to pour it on the woman and her vehicle as she tries to leave.
The gas station surveillance cameras captures this, as well as the 34-year-old woman’s futile attempts to get away from Mondesir and try to find help inside the convenience store. She doesn’t find any and the relentless Mondesir is able to set her on fire. Video footage captures the horrific image of the woman on fire as she first tries to enter the store for help, and then as she runs around the parking lot trying to put out the flames.…Continue Reading
Cleveland, OH - Speaking of people setting their partner on fire, a man Kniption reported on earlier this year has been sentenced for setting his girlfriend on fire while she held their baby.
Back in January, 31-year-old Kevin Ford got into an argument with his girlfriend, 31-year-old Tiffany Lawson. This argument led to Ford spraying lighter fluid on Lawson, who was holding their 11-month-old child, as he chased her around the house.
Lawson was able to make it to the second floor of their town home before Ford lit her clothing on fire. Lawson was able to drop her baby from the second floor window to someone waiting below, then strip off her burning clothing and take the same exit.
Both the baby and Lawson survived, with Lawson suffering second degree burns, a broken wrist and other injuries. Ford fled the scene before police arrived but was arrested later that day.
In April, Ford pleaded guilty to two counts of attempted murder, three counts of aggravated arson, three counts of felonious assault, four counts of kidnapping, two counts of domestic violence and one count of endangering children. On Thursday, Ford was sentenced to whopping 16 years in prison.…Continue Reading
Firefighters and police responding to a fire at an apartment building early Friday morning discovered the dead body of 24-year-old Michael Gonzales in one of the apartments.
His girlfriend, Gina Virgilio, initially told investigators that Gonzales had been drinking while celebrating his birthday when he started spitting gasoline from a cup on the floor and couch. When he lit a piece of paper, she says she ran out of the apartment. She said she heard glass break behind her, but never looked back.
After she left, she borrowed a cellphone to call her mother. She told her Gonzales had been abusive and was spitting gasoline at her while also using an aerosol can as a flamethrower. She said a fire broke out and that she had left the apartment. Virgilio was interviewed by police later that morning and then released that evening.
Her mother demanded to know what really happened when she returned from the interview and Virgilio did.…Continue Reading
Memphis, TN – Sometimes, as in this case, I post an article simply because of one line in the original article that I can’t help but find hilarious. Unfortunately, this article is regarding a fairly violent domestic assault out of Memphis.
Police say 30-year-old Angelus Gwynn and his girlfriend, 34-year-old Lakisha Cash, got into an argument over a car that led to Gwynn wrapping a tow chain around Cash’s neck and choking her until she passed out.
One neighbor who lives two doors down heard what happened when she got home,”They said she was literally on the ground. We had kids all out here and they thought she was dead. She was laying in the middle of the ground. They thought she was dead.”
Another neighbor who witnessed the events told police that, and here is the line I mentioned earlier, while Cash lay unconscious on the ground, Gwynn bounced a basketball off her head while he drank a beer.
Trust me when I say I do not find domestic abuse funny. But dammit, out of context, the visual that description puts in my head just cracks me up and I am positive that fact is helping secure my spot in Hell.…Continue Reading
Police say Tonya Thomas, 33, fatally shot her four children early Tuesday morning. Deputies identified the children as Pebbles Johnson, 17; Jaxs Johnson, 15; Jazlin Johnson, 13; and Joel Johnson, 12.
Three of the children – one of them ‘covered in blood’ – had reportedly gone to a neighbor’s front door before dawn to say that their mother had shot them. The mother then called the children back to the house and killed them, said Lt. Tod Goodyear, a spokesman for the Brevard County Sheriff’s Office.
“From what the neighbors said, she was very calm. She walked out and called them back. They turned around and walked back to the house,” Goodyear said.
The neighbor then heard gunshots and called 911.
According to police, another neighbor said that Thomas had sent a text message in the middle of the night saying she wanted to be cremated with her children.…Continue Reading
Hayle, England - A British man received a life sentence for an attack during which he gouged out the eyeballs of his then-girlfriend – a mother-of-two. The man did not allow the woman to call for help for 12 hours after inflicting the injuries. She is now blind.
Shane Jenkin, 33, of Hayle in Cornwall, reportedly attacked Tina Nash, 32, while she slept at her home in April 2011. Nash, 31, testified that she awoke to find Jenkin on top of her and strangling her. She lost consciousness as a result. During the attack – in addition to her eyes being gouged out – Jenkin broke her jaw and nose.
The court was told that Jenkin then waited 12 hours before allowing Nash to call for help.
Nash testified that after attacking her – during those 12 short hours that she remained blinded, broken, and bloodied, of course – Jenkin told her, “It’s all your fault. I’m going to get 20 years for this. You’re blind and your kids grow up.…Continue Reading
Las Vegas, NV – Police in Nevada are looking for a man accused of biting off the lip of his pregnant girlfriend — something he was arrested for doing to his wife a few years ago. Note for the squeamish, the two links below are of the two women’s injuries.
Back in 2008, 27-year-old Roberto Flores was arrested after he bit the lip off his then wife, Perla Padilla. She was in the hospital when she told police Flores he “bit off her entire lower lip, exposing her teeth and gums.”
Flores was found guilty of battery with substantial bodily harm and sentenced to a maximum of 5 years in prison. He was out in seven months. In January of this year he struck again, biting off the lip of his pregnant girlfriend.
Victoria Silva says Flores was a lot like me when they first met. ”Very funny, charming, nice looking, very nice personality,” she said in an interview while wearing a face mask to hide her disfiguring injury.
But as is usually the case with these psychotic assholes, it wasn’t long before he started showing his true colors.…Continue Reading
WATERTOWN, NY – On the evening of April 19, 21-year-old Jessica Baughman allegedly escalated an argument with her grandmother by removing 12 of her grandmother’s pet goldfish from their tank and sautéing them until they died. She also broke the elderly woman’s wooden wolf statue which was valued at all of twenty dollars.
Apparently, after the fish fry, there was an extended lull in the fighting because it wasn’t until about 12:30 a.m. when the police were called. It seems that the argument had resumed and grandma, 63-year-old Vera Nichols, claims that Baughman had become enraged again, pushing her until she fell onto a bed.
Baughman was arrested on charges of felony cruelty to animals, fourth degree criminal mischief and second degree harassment. Baughman was detained at the Metro-Jefferson Public safety Building and her bond was set at $2000
I know I’d be pretty peeved if someone murdered one of my pets in a culinary fashion but I couldn’t help myself, I laughed trying to imagine how this transpired. Maybe I’m a big old jerk, I don’t know.…Continue Reading
PALM BAY, Fl – Police have arrested a man after they say he got angry with his wife over her attending a concert, and attacked her with a box of Cheez-It snack crackers.
Police say 37-year-old Andy Gatz got into an argument with his wife on Monday after she attended an Earth Day concert. At the time of the confrontation, Gatz was under a court-ordered injunction to avoid having any contact with his wife.
During this argument, Gatz allegedly threw a box of Cheez-Its at her face, injuring her eye.
“A small square cracker apparently went into her right eye and caused her injury,” said Yvonne Martinez, spokeswoman for the Palm Bay Police Department.
Gatz had already left the home before police arrived, but turned himself in later. He told police he tossed a single Cheez-It cracker at his wife, not the entire box. He was arrested and charged with battery and violation of an injunction.
Gatz was allowed to leave jail on community supervision, but ordered to have no further contact with his wife.…Continue Reading
Gainesville, FL - Shenay Jackson, 19, is accused of pouring bleach into her ex-boyfriend’s lap while he was driving.
The pair were arguing in the car when Jackson first pushed him in the face before using the bleach to change the race of his penis. The bleach soaked through the unidentified man’s clothes, causing a burning sensation to his naughty bits that resulted in him pulling over to remove his clothing.
Jackson admitted to police that she got into an argument with her ex, but only picked up the bottle and shook it, causing some of it to splash on him. She never intended to get any on him.
However, the police report states there were puddles of bleach inside the car, far more than would be present had it came from merely shaking the bottle, and the man’s clothing were soaked and displayed severe discoloration.
Jackson was charged with simple battery, a first-degree misdemeanor, and was being held at the Alachua County Jail. I can’t help but think the charges would have been more severe had this been a man using bleach to make it rain on his girlfriend’s vagina.…Continue Reading
Muncie, IN – I’ve seen women remove men’s testicles before, placing them in their purse or in a jar placed on a high shelf in a closet, but the recently married men in those cases were usually willing participants.
Not so for the poor guy in Indiana, whose ex-girlfriend was arrested after she practically removed his testicles with her bare hands.
Police were called to the home of a 57-year-old man who reported his drunken ex-girlfriend, 43-year-old Christina Reber, had entered his home uninvited and had assaulted him in a most unpleasant fashion. Fellas, prepare to cringe.
The victim said shortly after yelling “call the fucking police” and slapping him in the head multiple times, Reber latched on to his low-hanging fruit and began “squeezing as hard as she could.”
Despite his best efforts, the man was unable to get Reber to let go as she began digging in her fingernails into his tool bag. It wasn’t until after they fell to the floor that the man was able to regain possession of his eggs and call 911.…Continue Reading
Los Angeles, CA – The mugshot you are looking at is 42-year-old Lisa Robin Kelly, better known as Eric Foreman’s slutty sister from “That 70s Show.” She got herself arrested Saturday on a felony charge of corporal injury upon a spouse, and was released on $50,000 bail.
But not before taking the mugshot that has now gone viral because if there is one thing people love, it’s actually seeing a visual representation of another’s downward spiral.
In this case the visual representation is in the form of a mugshot, one in which a disheveled Kelly manages to put something that resembles a smile on her face. The kind of smile someone uses immediately before slicing off their own nipples and drowning their young in the bathtub.
After she was released, Kelly took to her Facebook page and began begging her “friends” for money, claiming she is being set up by her boyfriend who is attempting to ruin her acting career and is making money selling pictures of her to TMZ.
“I did nothing to hurt John Michas.…Continue Reading
BISMARCK, N.D. – Police have arrested a man after they say he used a cattle prod on his ex-girlfriend during an argument.
According to the criminal complaint, 37-year-old Christopher Martin went to the home of his ex-girlfriend and accused her of stealing $500 from him the night before. The ensuing argument resulted in Martin producing a 5-foot-long cattle prod that he used to shock his ex.
When police arrived and interviewed Martin, he admitted shocking his ex out of anger over the missing money. Martin’s day got even better after a K-9 search dog at the scene hit on his vehicle. The resulting search would yield some weed, some meth and drug-related paraphernalia.
Martin was arrested and charged with felony aggravated assault-domestic violence along with a myriad of drug related charges. If convicted on the felony assault, he faces five years in prison and a $5000 fine.…Continue Reading
Fridley, Minn - A woman in Minnesota has been arrested and charged with three counts of animal cruelty after allegedly throwing three pit bull puppies at her 25-year-old boyfriend.
David Remme and 20-year-old Gabrielle Allen had been arguing inside an SUV outside an apartment complex last Friday morning when Remme allegedly struck Allen in the face, breaking her nose.
That’s when Allen reportedly picked up three week-old pit bull puppies that had been in the front seat and threw them at Remme. No reports on if she hit her mark, but the puppies landed in the parking lot.
As Allen left the Anoka County Jail with a black eye, she denied any wrong doing.
“I didn’t throw any puppies.” She claimed. “I was wrongfully incarcerated. I have a broken nose. I have some bruises and scars all over my back. That’s all I’m going to say.”
Police say that although the puppies landed on concrete, they appear to be fine. They were taken to a breeder for evaluation and neither of them were believed to have sustained any injuries.…Continue Reading
Pasco, FL - A 57-year-old Florida man is facing charges after he called 911 to complain that his wife would not let him look at Facebook in peace.
Doyle Hardwick only wanted to check his Facebook without his wife sitting next to him, so he tried to get her to go to bed with beer. But after consuming eight of them, his wife didn’t feel like moving and Hardwick called 911.
Caller (CLR) “says him and his wife are sitting next to each other,” the 911 transcript reads. “CLR is upset because she won’t go to bed. Now they are bickering about who has been drinking. CLR has had 4 beers. Wife has had 8 beers. … CLR is upset because she wouldn’t let him look at Facebook peacefully.”
When police arrived at the couple’s home, 54-year-old Julie Hardwick let them in and directed them towards her husband who was still on the phone with 911. Doyle Hardwick told the deputy that his wife was supposed to go to sleep after he gave her the beers because that was their agreement.…Continue Reading
Lake Worth, FL – Lisa Cherry, 46, was arrested on Monday after allegedly stabbing a man during an argument over how sick she was of cooking for him.
Police report that the 56-year-old male victim said Cherry began drinking beer and throwing food out the door because she was sick of cooking for him. He admitted to taking away her beer and threatening to cut her pony tail off if she didn’t stop throwing things.
Cherry allegedly picked up a kitchen knife and cut the home’s phone line before stabbing the man in the left hand. He refused to go to the hospital so his injury was treated at the scene.
The victim’s sister witnessed the stabbing and collaborated her brother’s account of the assault. Lisa Cherry was apprehended after trying to run from deputies and is being held at the Palm Beach County Jail with a bond set at $1,000. She faces aggravated battery charges with a deadly weapon.
It’s psychotic moments like this that make some men terrified to ask their chemically imbalanced women the age-old question, “Honey, what’s for dinner?”…Continue Reading